You know you're drunk when...

[Boring_Man]

You know you're drunk when...

 

1. You light the filter end of your cigarette and stare stupidly as it flares up (the dekserve was a peach, she laughed and said, "I do too!").

 

2. You say hello to the painting of the Egyptian girl by the stairs at Sheba's.

 

3. It's a beautiful day. You decide to take the car for a spin and head to your space. The car isn't there. The car probably hasn't been there for several days. You rack your brain and come up with three possible places where you might have left it.

 

Anyone else want to play?

[Nervous_Dog]

Your wife is away, you get drunk, really really drunk, come home, take your clothes off in the hallway, fall asleep beside the bathroom door only to be awoken by your wife coming home a day early.

 

. . . . hang on , that was last weekend

[Guest]

I took remit to include, both indicators of drunkenness from the night before and signs that indicate approaching drunkenness.

 

Some of these MAY at first sight indicate a tendency to overindulge, but fortunately in my case some of these ?side effects? to drinking large amounts are only exacerbated by various unrelated mental health problems ???

 

Apologies for any duplication

 

 

 

I wake up on the floor in my hotel room, next to my open fridge.

 

I wake up in a police cell

 

I wake up in a police cell and am not sure what for

 

I lean my head against the wall when taking a piss at a urinal

 

I talk complete bollocks

 

I vomit in the bed

 

I urinate in the bed

 

I urinate in the bed and blame it on the GF

 

In the morning I can?t remember whether the GF left me the night before, or her body is in the bath

 

I get angry

 

I accidentally burn my fingers with cigarettes

 

I don?t care. About anything. Ever.

 

I fall asleep sitting on the toilet

 

I want another drink.

 

When asleep, I can hold a conversation of pure meaningless drivel, with my eyes open (not to be confused with a ?blackout?)

 

I need help to find my car or motorbike, before driving home

 

In the morning I need time to remember where my car / motorbike is

 

In the morning I wake up in the road / on a pavement / in a ditch ? and the first thing I do is look for my motorbike

 

In the morning I wake up in the road / on a pavement / in a ditch and I can?t remember how I got there

 

In the morning I wake up in the road / on a pavement / in a ditch and it doesn?t surprise me

 

I wake up from a blackout to find myself having sex

 

I see ghosts of dead bargirls in my hotel room and have two sided conversations with them

 

I am happy to see ghosts of dead bargirls in my hotel room.

 

I wake up during the night and see a BG walking around and am not sure if she is a ghost.

 

I wake up with a BG or GF and hope she is not dead

 

I wake up with a BG or GF and wonder if she will fit into my new suitcase.

 

I decide to push my car home

 

I get argumentative

 

I have a ?black out? and it does not worry me

 

I start dancing

 

I set fire to the Hotel

 

I know everything

 

When asleep in my bed I lash out violently with my arms and legs

 

I can suddenly speak Thai

 

I get depressed

 

I like to take my clothes off

 

I am easily encouraged to take stupid bets

 

I become extremely happy

 

I like to climb statues and up the outside of buildings

 

I get convinced that I am sober

 

I wake up with NDI (non-specific drinking injuries)

 

I have a name for unexplained injuries.

 

I set fire to my hair. Sometimes by accident

 

I know lots of people who know more of my ?drinking stories? than I do.

[MaiLuk]

Fucking hysterical post

[MaiLuk]

>>In the morning I need time to remember where my car / motorbike is<<

 

In the morning i report my car stolen because it is not in the driveway. Forgot i walked home (and so did the girl that was with me)

[Guest]

In the morning i report my car stolen because it is not in the driveway. Forgot i walked home (and so did the girl that was with me)

 

Cool

 

I once reported to the Police that the tender to my boat had been stolen. (It was an 8 foot dingy)

 

I "found" it a couple of months later - sitting in my garage.

 

Because I had given the serial number I figured that I had to "de-report" it, the policeman had difficulty beleiving this explanation.

[..]

Nervous_Dog said:

Your wife is away, you get drunk, really really drunk, come home, take your clothes off in the hallway, fall asleep beside the bathroom door only to be awoken by your wife coming home a day early.

And the lesson learned was that five 100 baht plastic baggies of yaa dong is NOT a good idea, no matter how many Midnite gals help you drink it!

 

So we're doing it again next week, right?

 

Cheers,

S "hates two day hangovers, but like the fun associated with 5 baggies of yaa dong" D

[..]

Boring_Man said:

You know you're drunk when...you say hello to the painting of the Egyptian girl by the stairs at Sheba's.

At least you did not try to BF her. Or did you?

 

 

OK, I'll play. You are drunk when you give the taxi driver B2K for a B20 ride because the notes look the same in a drunken stupor.

 

Cheers,

S "where's my 1,960 baht?" D

[Nervous_Dog]

Shit - remember the night I tried to do that, only thing that stoppedd me was Goatscroat shapr eyes noticing!

 

I still owe you 1000 baht to! Where was you last night when I had the $

[John_Betong]

 

Hi All,

 

Just remembered about waking to the alarm at 06:00, the night after bonking and only had an hours kip. I stood in front of the bathroom mirror and put two contact lens in the same eye. What a bastard of a job to extract them:(

 

Cheers,

 

John_Betong