Good Girls or Bad Girls - Which is Best

[Raven]

There is discussion from time to time on this board about how to meet "normal" girls and how to treat them when you do meet them. For this post, I will refer to them as "good girls." The majority of discussion on the Board is of course about agogo girls, freelancers, BJ artists, massage girls, and the like. I will refer to them as "bad girls." There are of course many good "bad girls" and probably many bad "good girls." More on that later.

 

 

 

During my last trip to Bangkok, I was fortunate to taste a little of both - time with good girls and time with bad girls. In fact, during my most recent 11 night, 12 day stay in the Kingdom, I spent time with 6 bad girls and 5 good girls. Not an overly impressive number until you consider that I spent 24 hours with one "good girl" and 6 full days under the 24 hour watch and supervision of one "bad girl." That left five days for the other 9, so I had a full schedule.

 

 

 

I will get to the point. I thought I would enjoy the good girls more. They were pretty, college educated, spoke good English, and wanted to meet farangs. And in fact, I did enjoy their company. But the company of the bad girls was a lot more fun. They were more fun to be with - I could be myself and did not have to be on best behavior. And of course, there's that sex thing, which is kind of the point of the trip.

 

 

 

I am a little reluctant to share my methods, for fear that they may be abused. But I trust you will respect the girls, so here goes. I spent quite a bit of time on Bangkok Chat before I went. Met lots of good girls there, (and a few bad girls also). These girls generally are students or have recently graduated. We exchanged photos, chatted a lot and arranged to meet. I don't call them good girls lightly. With one exception, I did not touch any of the good girls. We met in a public place, usually alone, sometimes with her friends. We had dinner, or went to the market, or the museum. Essentially, we dated. No sex. If I were looking for a marriage partner, this would be a great short list - a scientist, couple of teachers, airline flight attendant, and a cute secretary. (There's always a cute secretary.) And I did not have time to meet 3 or 4 others who were qued up to meet me, including a couple of small business owners. Next trip.

 

 

 

The bad girls were predictable. Your usual mix of freelancers and agogo dancers. All cute as a button (or cute as a bug as one recent poster said). For the most part, great in bed. Not demanding. Fun to be with. Some problems with language, but the language of sanuk is generally physical. And the lady I spent 6 days with spoke good English.

 

 

 

I have come to the conclusion that most of the women who meet farangs either "professionally" or socially would like a long term relationship with a farang. And given my selection processes, I believe that most would like a long-term relationship with me. Most of the good girls have said as much. A couple of the bad girls as well.

 

 

 

Here's the problem for me. I will be honest. I think Thai women are beautiful. But the major reason I like them is that I enjoy the sex. It is possible to have sex with good girls. One was ready to on my last trip and two have stated that they want to have sex with me when I return. But there's a catch. They all want to marry. They think that I am a monogamous being. They think that I will be faithful to them. Most, but not all, of the good girls are virgins. I do not think that it is morally right to "take" a woman's virginity with false promises or by creating false expectations. Although they are great ladies, I think that until I am ready to move to Thailand and marry, we should just be friends. It is possible, but truly difficult to find a good Thai girl who is OK with an open relationship.

 

 

 

Which brings us to the bad girls. Lower maintenance than the good girls. Pay the bar fine and the nightly stipend. Be your usual friendly self, and you will have a great time 80+% of the time. If the relationship sours, move on. Even if it doesn't, move on. Hell, you're in Thailand.

 

 

 

I will keep in touch with 5 or 6 good girls. Some I met, some I did not have time to meet, and some I have just recently met on the Internet. But I will keep my nights free for my true love in Thailand - those wonderful, lovable, irresistible bad girls.

 

 

[Old Hippie]

Given a choice,which would you take, heaven for the weather, or hell fo the company and atmosphere?

 

 

[Coloseum]

An excellent post.

 

I chatted/exchanged messages and pictures with 3 good girls.

 

I couldn't wait to meet them.

 

Once in LOS I started off with a bad girl and that was that as

 

far as the good girls were concerned, I did not even bother

 

to call them. The encounter with the bad girl really put things

 

into perspective for me, and it became very clear to me why

 

I love the kingdom.

 

I just could not master the courage to call the good girls

 

knowing full well that I'd have to bullshit them one way or

 

another e.g as to why I came to LOS in thae first place, etc.

 

etc.

 

So, no more good girls for me in LOS I have enough of them

 

here at home.

[Pom_Jao_Choo]

Truly you are enlightened! And your wisdom runs deep like a river, or something like that.

 

Good Post!

[HSTEACH]

Damn GOOD Post! I fully agree. I've been in a similar situation before and although the "good" girls are nice and a good change of pace, it sure gets boring with the same senario each night, dinner and conversation. No sex, hell very little if any touching. It gets to the point where you look forward to that part every night when she says, "I've got to go home, work tomorrow," so you can take off the shirt and tie and go see the "BAD" girls. The Thai-Chinese girl I've seen the past three trips says her sisters "dated", if that's the correct word, their future husbands 3-4 years before marriage. That's a LONG time to go without! At my age, I don't know if I have the patience to last that long. Sure, she's very smart, well educated and wealthy and would make someone with a hell of a lot of patience a good wife, but in the long run, I still prefer the "bad" ones. It's immediate "satisfaction" with the "bad"ones instead of possible satisfaction somewhere way down the road with the TC lady.

[Guest]

>>>I think now it wasn't really love, it was an infatuation, not with the person, but with an insane experience, so totally opposite from my 'normal life', so complete different, that it enchanted me. I've felt like Alice through the looking glass.<<<

 

 

 

The above post came from another current thread, by pheonix. I think that this is what most of us experience in LOS. That one small paragraph above pretty much sums it up for me. We all have tons of 'good girls' surrounding us, no matter where we might come from. The attraction here are the 'bad ones' (expats excluded). Los represents one big giant candy store for many of us. It is insane, and completly different from our 'normal lives'. I exclude expats because I think they eventually tire of the scene, and desire something else over time, but I suspect they would tell you it took a long time to get there. I'm sure if I lived there, 5 years from now I would be looking for a 'good girl' also. Here's my point. Most of us have only 5-6 days over here maybe once a year (see all those posts...(only 298 more days). Maybe I've just been lucky, but what I experience with the b/g's I've been with is a great deal of fun, warmth, and caring on both our parts. Why is it I want to come back as soon as the wheels on my plane hit US soil? Because in those 5 days I've managed to develop a closeness with some very beautiful, sweet women, that would take me months to experience with a good girl from LOS. And I mean sex aside. I take my girls out on the town every time I'm here. Just the fun from that alone would keep me coming back. My last visit a month ago I was with a sweetheart on my last night who insisted on going with me to the airport at 8 am. We did have lots of sex, but I spent more time that night (all night) explaining to her that she shouldn't feel so bad about having a few stretch marks because of baby (she was unbelievably shy about it)...and that she's jai dee, and that's what's important. In the end, we made love with the lights on, and I must tell you, it was awesome. She was crying going out the door, in the taxi, and the whole time at the airport, saying "you not go". So what came out of that little one experience. I left LOS with wobbly knees, and she walked away feeling much better about herself that she did the day before. And no...she dosen't even have an email address, so not a gold digger. Only contact we've had is when I've called her several times at her bar to see how she was doing. I've got 4 more stories similar to that for the other 4 days I was there. I'll see her when I go back. May not b/f her, but I will see her to let her know I think about her, and am concerned for her. Is it even remotely possible for me to experience that kind of closeness with a 'good girl' in 16 hours after meeting her? Of course not. So you see, for me, this is the attraction. Would I marry her? No. But I'm not coming to Thailand to get married. I'm going there to have fun, and enjoy life's experiences. And that I do. I guess it all comes down to what your objectives are. I'd much rather sanook with a good girl, but it's just not going to happen in the 5 days I get to be there. Just too much protocol in the way.

[Raven]

High Thaied - Nice Post. I think you have summed up the experience with a more down to earth description. I know that I have a hard time separating my infatuation with the "bad girl" of the moment from my infatuation with the whole scene. On both ends of my trip, I usually find myself thinking about this.

 

 

 

At the start of the trip, I sip a beer in Soi 7 (pick your venue - massage parlor, bar beer, agogo, etc.), look at all the ladies and think to myself. "Wow! Look at all these beautiful women. And I am going to get laid by one (or two) of them tonight."

 

 

 

In the middle of the trip, if I am lucky, I will have found a nice lady with adequate English, passable social skills, good looks, and bedroom talent to spend several days with.

 

 

 

At the end, I usually find myself in one of the aformentioned venues, surveying the scene and thinking to myself "I am one lucky bastard." The bad girls are simply great. The relationships never last, even though I try to stay in touch. But they sure are nice while they do last.

 

 

 

The good girls are also very nice. So earnest, so sincere. But in truth, not what pulls me to LOS again and again.

[anonymouse]

Well I'd describe by girlfriend as a good/bad girl!

 

When I first met her she was working in a a bar she didn't drink, smoke or take drugs - she still doesn't. She was a sweet person and fun to be with - same, same now.

 

She now works for herself [ with very little financing by me ] providing catering services for various functions.

 

When I am in Thailand we can mix freely with people in her village from all walks of life farmers , police chiefs, uni students, etc. We can also go into town and drink in bars that a 'good Thai girl' wouldn't be seen dead in. We recently purchased a house in her village and she has become a good friend of the lady lawyer who dealt with all the legal side of things.

 

I've met the one for me, basically what I'm saying is it's not always black and white and you can find good/bad girls out there who get as bored with 'the scene' as some expats do.

[Guest]

who in their right mind would ever go with a good girl when they can have a bad girl? - unless they plan to get married that is.

 

 

 

in the uk good girls are ten a penny - once they latch onto you it can take months to get rid of them

 

 

 

give me a bad girl any day of the week

 

 

 

 

[the_numbers]

BG's (Bad Girls) are clearly the magic that keeps this debacle running.

 

 

 

Q: Is anyone guilty of going after a good girl, and maybe actually self deluding (or not) into thinking: "I'm invested in this", landing in bed with her. Then finding yourself going away, and knowing full well you've soiled a girl who thinks you are her beau, the ideal farang, and knows nothing of your nefarious intentions, and/or bargirl rompings? Maybe nobody wants to fess up to this.