Guest Posted May 22, 2002 Report Share Posted May 22, 2002 "he cried he used to cut his wrist, took the medicine. " If he is acting in this unhealthy way in his forties, he will not likely grow out of it. You may be in love (in your twenties), but eventually love will not be enough. You will think and feel differently about him in the future. Hopefully you will not have damaged your self too much by then. Is he doing the housework while unemployed? It is wonderful that you want to help and support him, but it is his responsibility to solve his problems.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 22, 2002 Report Share Posted May 22, 2002 A good measure of a person is to see how they react to adversity. In your boyfriend's situation, I would think he would be improving his English and searching for any job he could find, as well as doing the washing, cooking, etc while you work. This situation is stressful for both of you. Does he show concern for your stress, or mostly his own? How is his attempting suicide going to help you, seeing as he supposedly loves you and therefore puts you ahead of himself? He exhibits the classic signs of a victim. Although you want to help him, that may just accomodate his "woe is me" victim attitude. If this is your first love, it may seem hard to believe there is someone out there more worthy, but there is. Often we are attracted to those who have some kind of problem we relate to in some way. This is not a healthy thing to give in to. It can be a sign that we possibly have unresolved issues to deal with. If I were you, I would give him a certain amount of time to fix himself and his situation, and if it does not happen, leave him and ask yourself some hard questions about your attraction to him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 22, 2002 Report Share Posted May 22, 2002 "Lets hope the next two quarters bring better news" I sure hope something changes with IT. Here in the States the situation doesn't look like it is going to get any better any time soon. Even highly skilled people are having a hard time getting work and I don't see what it is in IT that's going to change. Is there really any difference for an office admin who uses Word, Excel, or Powerpoint whether they have a 2 ghz desktop(with flat panel display) or a 600 mhz PC workhorse? Is a company going to shell out big bucks for all their office people to have faster PCs? How different is Windows XP (really) from Windows 95/98? Do employees REALLY need web access? What about having your datacenter monitored 24/7 by remote admin in India? Or Ireland? How many new applications are being developed? How much new software do you see at Pantip as opposed to 1 or 2 years ago? I'm hoping to land one of those high paying brick layer jobs!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shygye Posted May 22, 2002 Report Share Posted May 22, 2002 Call Immigration police. He has overstayed his visa and they can ship him back to his home country. There he can get some help and when he is better he can return. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iuytrede Posted May 22, 2002 Report Share Posted May 22, 2002 I am surprised how much good old-fashioned work ethic we find on this board! Actually a bit too much for my taste. I can understand very well that not every farang is fluent in English, I recommend some of you Americans out there have a trip to Makedonia or Estremadura - good luck with your English! And some posters seem to think every farang country is well-off! Go to Portugal or Ukraine and you will be surprised. And I can understand very well that it may be hard to find a job in Bangkok (manual labor is forbidden for farang). One thing you might try is saving money by adapting to a "poor" lifestyle. For example, many people in Europe don't own a car (even if they could afford one). You mentioned moving to a cheaper place, maybe you can find someone who will stay in your old place so you don't necessarily lose the deposit. Another thing you both might try is some kind of "self-employed" work for your BF. You can do some small business (open an internet-cafe or selling food, whatever) and he can be very helpful (buying stuff, doing backoffice work). But as your boyfriends condition seems rather serious, it is maybe better for him to go home for a while. In Thailand he is (just) a foreigner, in his country he might get back some self-esteem. Of course this depends on the economic situation back home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 22, 2002 Report Share Posted May 22, 2002 Excellent flic, Repo Man! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 22, 2002 Report Share Posted May 22, 2002 definite troll - the grammatical mistakes are inconsistent in pattern/type - bizarre mix of relatively high brow words, basic, complex mistakes in syntax - it is very very very very unusual for a male with suicidal ideation to cut his wrists - wrist cutting is virtually the preserve of females crying for help or the occasional truely suicidal female - males pursue other (often more violent) avenues to express suicidal feelings - failure to respond to questions regarding the citizenship/details of the BF - the starting of a new thread (maximising exposure) instead of replying within the original thread - lame reason to explain 'her' posting on this particular board - the next question the troll is likely to ask is "what is a troll"...would've been before i mentioned it anyway Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 22, 2002 Report Share Posted May 22, 2002 Yes, this might be a troll, but if not the BF seems to have quite serious psychiatric problems. There is several alternatives like clinical depression (as someone pointed out before) and that could require medical treatment or/and therapy. He could also suffer of somekind of personality disorder that could explain his selfdestructive behavior. A third chice is alcohol/drug problems. It could ofcourse be a combination of these (two or more). whatever it is Iwould recommed a visit to a doctor, a shrink would be the best but any good doctor could do. Good luck ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 22, 2002 Report Share Posted May 22, 2002 I upgraded from a 300 ( OCed to 450 ) Celeron to a 750 PIII last year & could hardly notice the differance with my usage. Internet, Word, Picture Publisher & Front Page.. Same Same Basic aps are mature, what can be done with a word processor today that could not be done with Ami Pro 3 under win 3.1 w/ 8 meg ram .. or outside of big band width Flash type aps any HTML coders.. Gamers need hardware & new games.. no need for a corporation to upgrade the clerical staff. management needs bandwidth for intra & inter communication.. I don't get the stagnation in fiber optics intergration. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gummigut Posted May 22, 2002 Report Share Posted May 22, 2002 Did I miss something or has the nationality of the boyfriend in question has not been mentioned. So, what is the boyfriend's nationality? As for the situation... Moving to a cheaper apartment is a help that needs to be investigated more fully. If the Boss knows of the situation, he should be able to lend you the 1 or 2 months security which you will pay back when you get the security from the existing apartment. If Jitima is indeed earning 20k a month, that is more than enough for a cheap apartment and food for 2 if they eat cheaply. The goal now is to get income to equal expenses until the boyfriend can secure a job. Which at this point seems very unlikely for a variety of reasons but I think it mainly stems from a will-to-work. Jitima has made the decision to support this guy do to love. While I don't agree with this I think it is something we should all take as a given. <<burp>> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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