TGs who marry Farangs must be Hookers ?

[sidsanuk]

Let's not get too wound up guys. The discussion of colour etc here was purely in relation to Thais perception of other Thais. Where colour shade does have status implications it would seem.

 

Let's not try to extend that beyond the discussion topic, because we might get into some 'heavy' racist areas.

 

Only throwing my views in, as I started this thread and hence the background to the title. :-)

 

 

 

Sid

[cardinalblue]

sidsanuk,

 

That was my point exactly. Yet the above discussions were so superficial and silly without ever looking at the root causes and the history of color in relationship to society. It is like taking someone to look at a football game and then explaining the rues of the game of another sport.

 

That is why i suggested that the color conversation be terminated. You either fully expore into a subject and give it its due or don't do it at all. In this case, the latter is the better option.......my point being your discussion topic is directly about color as a key ingredient. Racism implications was there from the get go and one needed to dig much deeper to get beyond racism. I don't think you intended it to happen, but your topic quickly turned into what came first, the cart or the horse thinking......dangerous terrotory indeed.

 

cardinalblue

[pattaya127]

Interesting, I always thought that Thais could tell if a girl was a BG from 100 metres :-)

-----------------------------------------

 

Only if she behaves or dresses as one, or the age difference between her and the farang is flagrant (like 35 Years+). All the rest is assumption on their parts, or laziness to imagine a farang and a non-BG can love each other.

I have read the posts about the look that some get when walking with a thai woman.

Just spent days in BKK, took the skytrain a couple times back and forth every day, did not encounter one bad look, actually the people are rather mum, just like in any public transportation system in the big cities.

Actually, at some points, some lady and her daughter could not refrain laughing at the big farang next to her, Kao san Rd type, bandana on a very hairy head, and I must say Gf and I joined blinked at her in approval. We farangs can be very odd funny to thais.

Other than that Skytrain is the epitomy of anti-sanook, strangers stuck together and keeping to each other.

Wherever I go in Thaialnd, I have seen very little problem with thais relating to us. I am quite sure some assume it's just farang with paid wife from the bars of Pattaya or Nana, but I see no animosity, so i still think that "live and let live" can be applied to how most thais live their life and look at others.

[sidsanuk]

Obviously not the intention...but point taken.

 

Sid

 

[limbo]

Hi Cardinalblue,

 

my intentions were absolutely not to start anything related to racism.

Fine with me to stop here.

 

Cheers,

Limbo

[Guest]

>>>Unfortunately I have to tell you that in my opinion a lot of things changed in terms of how the Thai?s see a Thai/Falang couples. <<<

 

personally, we do not have that problem that people mistake my missus for a prostitute and me her client here generally. she is one month younger than me and i speak thai relatively well. we do not go often to tourism areas (where it occasionally happens that someone insults us that way thinking i do not speak thai, but that is cleared up usually very fast - i can swear like a market women in thai :hubba:).

 

i see different reasons than racism for the change of attitude here. first of all, thais are not anymore overly "obediant" towards westerners, they have seen more than their fair share of western lowlifes and judge us now more by what we really are than what their perception of us is, a thing which i think makes life a lot better here, because it makes it easier for us foreigners to understand reality in this country and not just that "land of smile" surface.

seondly, it is not automatically that a former prostitute is looked down upon because of her former profession, more because of her low class background. my missus, who is from a poor village family, but was not a prostitute gets the same shabby treatment just because of her social background. one of the not so nice things of the land of smiles is the very rigid class structure.

 

in case of former prostitutes, it depends very much on their actual behavior. my missus has good friends (and family members) who were prostitutes, no problem. but unfortunately there is a tendency which many to put on airs about money, maybe it's just a defensive form of arrogance, but that does not go down well with my missus.

 

just face it, thailand is not, and most definatele never was, that paradise of smiling and friendly people. the only difference now is, that we farang have it a lot easier to see reality.

still, as a foreigner i can creat myself here a better life than i could anywhere else and i don't have any plans moving.

 

 

 

[jingjoh]

I was hoping you would continue with your ideas on this, it would make a great topic if we could keep the moral crusaders out of the equation and discuss it on a purely emotionless level.

 

 

[Guest]

Hi flyonzewall,

 

I like to follow you quite a way down. The whole subject is a lot about the very personal perception. That is also the reason why I declared my first post as our (my) subjective opinion. Furthermore, it is in no way the intention to paint a too dark picture about anything or even to make Thailand or it?s people bad in anyway. If it came over this way I am sorry. But however, it was our experience. Even though we can claim the exactly same ?advantages? when it comes to our appearance and the impression people should get about us like you do in your post . We certainly should not get mistaken as prostitute/punter couple anymore. We are also just two years apart from each other and we both are around our 40th. Additionally at no time I ever was/lived in Thailand to find a women, in the opposite, looking at some friends, I felt pity at the time for everybody loading his live with such kind of problems (I hope everybody understands what is ment). But who knows what love is?

 

Coming back to the subject: In fact we did make exactly the opposite experience like you describe conc. the where one gets the looks. At the time we come as ?Tourists? to Thailand we spend most our time at the beaches say the tourist venues. There we never encounter this issue. As a matter of fact in two month we will be on the islands again with whole our families and we are looking forward to it. What I ment was more the attitude of the people we meet during business dinners or parties we were invited. One party we were invited we had to leave (we left ourselves, they did not kick us out), because the insult my wife encountered was not bearable. Of course we received an apology from the host, but some years ago nobody ever would have dared to say something like that loud. And this is what I mean. The ?Thai rak Thai? thing (I am sure that the insiders know what I mean). I would guess that the average people on the street not even know what is going on. But people like this rule the country. And under this aspect and the fact that in my opinion it is very uncertain were this will end up, we (my wife and I) have to seriously reconsider if Thailand still can be our place for retirement. Even though we have no alternative at the moment.

 

I hope I did not violate any board rules, I tried to avoid the forbidden subject as good as I can, but bottom line it is what it?s all about. All the expats are invited to read between the lines, I am actually very curious to hear about your opinion.

 

Cheers

 

[gummigut]

BKKFREAK:

 

Thanks for your posts.

 

Interesting point about New York. I grew up in New York City and yes, there tend to be rather few looks if you are a caucasian male with an asian female. Other way around can be a bit different. I have been "hassled" at times (being an asian male almost always with a white female). Was much worse when I was growing up and thankfully relatively rare when I left (2-years ago). Then again, being older helps. I'm sure younger asian males still get looks.

 

As for your point about respect in general here in Thailand... I'd have to agree with you. The rudeness can be incredible. Even from people who are serving you. They can be bold as brass. Have a problem with a serving girl from Flyers. Really nasty piece of work.

 

Anyways, I would also like to say that some farangs do bring it on themselves. I'm sitting reading the paper in my lobby and in comes a caucasian guy. Late 30's. Good dress shirt, nice slacks, and shiny black shoes. Quality looking guy. His arm candy was a very cheap looking bar girl (oh my gawd, how did I know she was a bar girl?) in daisy duke shorts riding so high on her bubble butt I'm surprised I didn't see lips. Exposed midriff in a cheap top. Carrying on a rather loud conversation. Obviously they've been together for atleast a day or two. Least it isn't boring over here

 

<<burp>>

[Guest]

Hi Gummigut,

 

very, very interesting point of view you bring in. The vise versa situation, white female with colored guy. This brings an event to my mind which happened mid of the 80th while I studied English in Sydney. The time I was engaged with a very beautifully girl from Persia. She came from a very wealthy family who had to leave the country because of the big changes going on in her country at the time (I try to avoid politics as good as I can ) When it came to the point that I was introduced to her family (we kept our relationship as a secret because she preferred it that way) her father immediately made his veto against it and we had to break up.

 

Several weeks later on I met a friend of the family who worked as a doctor in the Sydney hospital. I asked him: ?What?s up? What?s wrong with me? I have a good education, a future, my family is also not last to find in Europe and by the way we love each other.?

 

He just said and I never will forget it: ?You are white. You not suit into his (the father?s) family for this reason. And by the way, don?t be so arrogant, what you think the most European Families would say if her bellowed daughter would come home with a Persian Muslim??

 

Uhhhhhh....! What can you say. He was and is right. And therefore, as sad as it is, I fully agree with you, that for a female it is, still today, much harder having a relationship with a men from another race then vice versa. And this closes the loop to my previous post. The people on the street have rarely the guts to directly address the mixed couple issue and/or they do not care at all. If they do however I ignore it, which does not mean that my mood does improve. Whereas ?the families? do have this guts more and more. ?How can a proper Thai get so low to merry a Falang?? And the only thing I like to express with this story is, that when the well educated people forget about the rules of correct behavior and respect, something is going to be wrong.

 

Cheers

 

PS: Gummigut, seeing businessmen showing up with a girl like you described her, I am also puzzled. I cannot understand why guys like them are doing this. If they really are what they pretend to be by their looks, then there are many much more ?gentlemen? like ways to get their share of fun in BKK and any other capitol in this world as well. Therefore, I just give them a smile.