itsmedave Posted June 3, 2003 Report Share Posted June 3, 2003 After a year of living together, my Thai girlfriend and I are thinking of taking the plunge around Christmastime. I have no clue how weddings are done in Bangkok (we will NOT be going to her village) and Dee herself informs me that she has no real clue either since "I never get married before." Our nuptuals will need to be done on the cheap...a small affair. (not all of her family nor all of my friends will be invited) It can be done Thai style with the monks and all or quasi western. Please skip all references to customs such as the paying of the dowry since it won't be happening in this case (hoping her father won't even be there) So, what do we do? Where do we go? How are invites and arrangements made? How long for planning? And yes, how much??? Thanks for all your help! Dave Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
khunsanuk Posted June 3, 2003 Report Share Posted June 3, 2003 Hi, No real clue about this myself either, but you are welcome to come over and let the girls talk. Sanuk! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stickman Posted June 3, 2003 Report Share Posted June 3, 2003 I'll tell you about what we did, though exactly how typical this is, I couldn't be sure. We had two functions, a traditional Thai wedding in the city of Korat and a Western style party in Bangkok, where a few board members were present. The traditional Thai wedding ceremony starts early in the morning around 8:00 AM or so and is all round up well before midday. I believe the first step is walking around on your knees feeding 9 monks, but we never did this as my wife is not Budhhist. Ours started with a parade down the soi where my mother in law lives which took a few minutes and was a lot of fun. We ended up at the house and then there were various facets to the ceremony including the display of the bride price, pouring the water and other bits and pieces that I do not remember clearly. (I do have it all on video and you are welcome to have a look at it.) Important note: It is at this ceremony that a bride price may be paid. I paid one and got it all back. Think carefully about what you want to do here... This was followed by a buffet brunch, although the food was more the type of thing Westerners would consider lunch or dinner. There was not a lot of alcohol and unlike many reports that I have read, no-on was drunk at ours, at least none of the Thais. A couple of my farang guests had a bit to drink. The total cost of this was around 40,000 baht which included the buffet food, drinks, flower arrangements, signs and a few other decorative items. This money was recovered in wedding gifts - remember it is more common for Thais to give an envelope than a gift. The ceremony in Korat was VERY enjoyable. 5 days later we had a more Western style wedding party at a Bangkok hotel. It is amazing what you can get for the money. Total cost for an AMAZING do at a 5 star hotel with food for 100 guests was 60,000 baht. This also included a night in a room at the hotel valued at $US 450 a night - and all sorts of other goodies. As far as value for money goes, it was quite outstanding. The Thai guests gave money in an envelope, the faransg gifts and we were embarrassed that we the cost was completely recovered andthen some. *If money is a concern, don't be shy to tell guests - farangs at least, that "an envelope would be preferred"* Now, before you get married, you have to consider the wedding photos. I think this is a Thai thing as I sure haven't heard of it in the West. You go to a wedding studio, get made up, and get all sorts of photos taken of you professionally. For a couple of large framed pictures, about 15 15 X 12 inch photos and the same photos at regular 4 X 6 size, this cost about 40,000 baht. This price also included a professional photographer to come to the Bangkok party, fire off five rolls of film, get them developed, printed and back to us. ALSO included was her wedding dress, my tux and also traditiona Thai outfits for the wedding ceremony in Thailand. Unlike the other costs, this was NOT recovered, but hey, you gotta pay for something yourself. Oh yeah, the 40K also included these really nice invitation cards and thank you cards too. I hope this helps. Stick Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 3, 2003 Report Share Posted June 3, 2003 "I think this is a Thai thing as I sure haven't heard of it in the West" The wedding photo thing is common back in Sweden. Did an album with photos of different sizes. Ended up paying about 13000 baht. Fredro Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gummigut Posted June 3, 2003 Report Share Posted June 3, 2003 I've got a new business idea!!!! LOS VEGAS!!!! We can open Thailand's first casinos!!!! Have faux Elvie Presley's give marriage ceremonies with Katoey volleyball team witnesses!!!! Oh man, this'd be a cash cow!!!!! I am selling timeshare investments. It will be right next to the oil plant in Rayong. It'd be great!!!! Seriously though, the information that seems to be missing is didn't you guys have to file papers anywhere? I'm assuming that if you file those papers then your married. <<burp>> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 3, 2003 Report Share Posted June 3, 2003 "I think this is a Thai thing as I sure haven't heard of it in the West" The wedding photo thing is common back in Sweden. Did an album with photos of different sizes. Ended up paying about 13000 baht. Fredro I believe it is common in whole Europe, isn't it? But americans tend to believe that the USA is the West. Best regards Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 4, 2003 Report Share Posted June 4, 2003 itsmedave, Here goes, my memory is a bit hazy ......some background info: We registered our Marriage at an Amphor in a Province just outside Bangkok (outside of Bangkok by 5-10kms) where my wife and her family lived. We had a Buddhist Thai ceremony at her house in the morning and a reception at a hotel in Bangkok that evening. Before Ceremony Arrangements Approximately 6 weeks before our ceremony my wife and I had a photo session with a professional photographer. This took 1 day to do and the morning was spent on make-up for my wife and the afternoon was where the photos were taken. We dressed up in all kinds of clothes, from Traditional Thai kit, to a Japanese Emperor and Chinese Emperor. I would say we arrived around 10am in the morning and finished at 6pm. You should note that photos will be taken at the studio with different backdrops and then you should go out to a park or garden area for photos as well. We had around 200 photos taken, but, we could only select 50 photos. Included in this was a wedding dress that my wife could wear to the wedding reception at the hotel! The final delivery was 50 photos delivered in a very beautiful photo book, 2 "gold" framed photos (big enough to put on your wall), presents to give our guests, invitation cards. The total cost was 52,000 Baht. Was this money well spent and would I recommend this to others? Absolutely! The photos give us a lifetime of memories and whilst it was a tiring day it was certainly fun! 3 weeks prior to the wedding I needed to get certain documentation in order for me to be legally married in Thailand and this involved : A statutory declaration from the Australian embassy stating I was fit for marriage Translating said document into Thai Visiting the Ministry of Home Affairs (on ChaengWattana, of Viphavdi Rangsit) to have the translation certified. 2 weeks prior to the wedding my wife and I were married. We went to the local Amphor, we had my wife's father as a witness to the ceremony (BTW, you need 2 witnesses). Since we were 1 witness short the person working at the Amphor processing our documentation was the second witness. I believe I needed to bring the Statutory declaration and my passport and my wife needed her id card and house registration papers. Other than that, I cannot remember. The Friday before the wedding (wedding on Sunday) all of my family arrived from overseas, so we went through a rough rehersal of everything and then had a big family dinner out! There was a natural argument over which family paid the bill and we won the fight to pay the bill (total cost 2,800 Baht for 20 people)! Unbelievably cheap! On the Saturday before, I went to my wifes house to help with preparations! Total cost for everything at the morning ceremony was around 100K, this included 100-120 people and improvements to the house (i.e repainted etc..). Wedding Day - Morning Ceremony On the Sunday morning the ceremony started around 8:45am (or some other lucky time which I can't remember) and I and my family / friends started at my uncles house next door. I led the pack with designated people behind carrying fruits, sweets etc....As I walked out the front gate of the uncles house I had too yell into a microphone oi-oi-oi 3 times. After each one, the people behind me would yell oi. This was some call to the family I was on my way and possible other meaning that cannot be recalled. As I reached the gate I had to bribe my way into the house by going through different gates. It was suppose to be 5 gates , but, ended up being around 15 gates. Total cost of bribes would be around 8,000 Baht. By the way, when discussing this and you ask the expected value of gate and number of gates to calculate total amount required, triple the estimated value! You don't want to run out of money. Additionally, the money was in white envelopes. Becareful, they will ask for multiple enevlopes so don't put large values in the envelopes. recommend 20-50 Baht notes and sometime max 100 Baht. My best man controlled this and I had a 20 Baht envelope stash, 50 Baht envelope stash and a 100 Baht envelope stash. The best man had to stash them in different pockets of his coat and remember which was which! Lastly, the first gates are suppose to be the cheapest and the last gates being most expensive. Once I got to my wife, I brought her downstairs where we sat down and displayed the Sin Sot (pre-arranged amount) and put on all the necessary jewellary (gold bracelet, necklace and diamond ring). Don't ask for cost of jewellary as that is private! Whilst this was being performed they had an announcer on the microphone stating amount of sin-sot and jewellary (weight). When this was finished, the monks arrived from our local temple (total of 9 monks) and they prayed for us, splashed water on us and then we "fed" the monks. Typically, the monks will eat the food then, but, the monks at our local temple don't like to intrude on proceedings and took the food and left. This was okay for us as it would have been boring waiting for them to finish! After the monks left, there was a 10-15 minute interval, my wife changed into another dress and then we had the "tie our wrists" together and pour water over our hands. This was performed by every guest (strictly speaking it should be a select set of guests only and based on seniority). After the guest has tied our wrists together and poured water over our hands they will recieve a present from us. Additionally, the best man would be standing behind me the whole time (this took around 1 hour)!! After this time it is eating and drinking time. This would be around 10:30-11am in the morning and considered brunch but the style of food was lunch/dinner!!! There were a couple of people having beer / whisky but not much! Wedding Day - Night Reception At midday the wife and I left for the hotel were we could relax for a while and prepare for the reception. The reception started at 6pm in the evening. We had invited 350 people to attend and expected 280 to attend. In the end proceedings got under way at 7:30pm with 350-360 people. So beware, typically if you invite 350 then 350 will turn up. As some people you asked to come won't attend, but, friends or relatives of others will! We were 50 people short in table space, but, the hotel sorted this out within 5 minutes and with no disruption to the atmosphere! Typically, when a person arrived they would go to the "table" where they would give their envelope of cash or present to the person behind the 'table' and sign the wedding book. An appointed family member would greet the guest and introduce them to both sets of parents. Then they would cover over to the photo area where the groom and bride are for a photo. The reception followed mainly western traditions and was a sit down dinner. So it was quite formal! The hotel included the ballroom, food, sound, lighting, decorations, flowers, ice sculuptures, wedding book, beer, softdrinks, water, wedding cake and a night in the hotel as part of the package. Due to the expense of wine we asked each international guest to bring 1-2 bottles over with them . This covered the wine segment! In the end the total cost was around 300K for 350 people and all inclusive. 95% of thai people gave money which we have recorded somewhere so we can remember how much they gave and use that as an indication for us giving in the future. 50% of international guests provided money and the other gifts! I was upfront with them about the "okayness" for money gifts! We recieved more than our total outlay! As soon as the formalities were over most people left (around 9pm) but family and friends hung around much later. In the end, my wife and I got up to the honeymoon suite at 11:45pm!!!! So tired we feel asleep as we had to be up at 5:45am in the morning for our trip to Phuket! We had the day photographed an videoed and this added another 20K to the cost but is was included in the 300k amount stated above. With this, we ended up with 500 photographs of the day and 2 videos! It was an extremely rewarding day that will be remembered for ever! In terms of cost, you should only do it once in your life so don't be too hung up on cost! Becareful about invitations, as at once stage my wife was looking to have more than 600 people attending, which was going a little over the top. I guess your all sleeping now! Wake up!! Sanukboot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BelgianBoy Posted June 4, 2003 Report Share Posted June 4, 2003 SB, WOW extraordinary post !!! Thanks for the effort and it really gives all details....... Another subject here for me....... my GF - who wants to marry me - is a fullblooded Bangkok catholic girl. Anybody out there with experience in a catholic wedding ? Cheers ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whosyourdaddy Posted June 4, 2003 Report Share Posted June 4, 2003 Woohoo.. Another Bachelor party!!!!! This time I will not be giving you 7000B to go find 4 girls.. You can give it to me and I will do the famous Itsmedave these are my girls and I am going to friggen enjoy them!!!! Just give Madstockbroken and I a call, we know a few katoeys that will make you squirm!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grabii Posted June 4, 2003 Report Share Posted June 4, 2003 Naiv, The statement was made by a New Zealander, not by an American. Regards, JEff Says naiv: Says Fredo: Says Stickman: "I think this is a Thai thing as I sure haven't heard of it in the West" The wedding photo thing is common back in Sweden. Did an album with photos of different sizes. Ended up paying about 13000 baht. Fredro I believe it is common in whole Europe, isn't it? But americans tend to believe that the USA is the West. Best regards Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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