Damaged BG?

[drogon]

Greetings

 

I would like your views on this subject:

To which extent do you think these girls are damaged mentally and physically?

 

- Their approach to relations with men.

- Their approach to sex.

 

Mine told me she built a strong wall between her and customers so that customers could not come too close.

(and the wall is hard to break as to her own words: " I am in a zone between customer and something else"

She also admits she is a bit of schysophrene (do not know the exact English term) as she has 2 personalities.

 

All the psychology and theory of communication courses I followed at university did not prepare me to deal with such a pain.

 

Thx for your comments.

[Guest lazyphil]

guys seem to be able to have good relations with their thai wives and yet have sexual intercourse with many bgs on the side, same could apply to bgs.......

[zob65]

I think a great deal of them would like to get married and live happy ever after, until they are dragged into the mire and become a run of the mill bg.

 

I feel sorry for them, put yourself in their shoes, work 6 days a week getting a hard time from the bar and the customers, then go home get fleeced by the boyfriend or family. Then do 10 years gradually dropping down the pecking order of bars. With a future of ? maybe mamasan? som tam seller? second wife to a old thai famer? I think thats why most of them live from day to day making the most of it.

 

Some I have met have been smart enough to buy houses or businesses but they are very few and far between.

 

I think you would have to become mentally scarred.

[Old Hippie]

Speaking from my experience with a few BGs I've gotton close with, it seriously fucks them up emotionally if they stay in the biz too long. Some come to only associate sex with money, and not any emotional attatchment...love to many means "how much? how often?"

[ChristianTroy]

I don't see how this issue is exclusive to BGs.

Face it... men are hormon steered monsters, long legs, good ass and nice boobs and we jump on it if she let us! It's natural they build a wall around themselves!

[Ranger]

I think Stickman once offered his opinion that you had about 90 days to save a BG before she would be irreparably and permanently damaged psychologically. A bit of a generalization, but probably pretty accurate. They have to build up defense mechanisms to mentally and physically deal with the degradation of their reality and many turn to drugs and/or alcohol to be able to deal with it. Get them out early and maybe you have a chance.

 

Ranger

[Old Hippie]

Like I said, I knew many when they started, and know them now, it is like 2 compleately different people...the job has clearly taken it's toll, and many had issues to start...

 

I'll further disagree with CT, and say there are certain elements to a BG's life, that don't exist for a "regular girl" or even the local bar slut.

[asiafun]

The 90 days is a number I have seen quoted a number of times and in my own experience it is a pretty good barometer of their mental state.

[Julian2]

I wonder if what we call "taking it's toll" is mere adaption to their new environment. Perhaps some of us see more in it than what's there. A trainee teacher would face his first class with the same trepidation a new P4P girl would with her first farang customer, but as he becomes more experienced his confidence increases.

Do some of us want to think of them as damaged so we can rescue them? Make them fall in love with us so we can look upon it as real relationship rather than sex with a prostitute?

The girls that work farang bars still have choices in their lives, they can refuse customers or even a drink, IT NEVER HAPPENED TO ME IT WAS SOMEONE I KNEW. Sure the money's not as good but if they really don't want to fuck they don't have to. That most of them finally do doesn't neccessarily make them damaged in my opinion, they just get on with their lives with a more realistic outlook.

[drogon]

I dont agree totally with you.

 

- Yes they can and the ones I know do refuse customers.

 

but they sometimes do not have many options left when the end of the month comes (even the saving ones) or when family is pressuring them etc......

 

- Do we like to think about them as damaged ones?

Some of us maybe but I think we canot deny the reality of the damages.

now to me the question would be:

 

- Are they (in general) too damaged to be able to live

a "normal life"? (what is a normal life?)

 

 

IME:

I have never been so close to a BG before, I mean I know her better each day and I can not stop myself of studying her behavior (thx to university courses).

 

Although she is quite different in her behavior from her "sisters"

at the end of the day -> she sells her body to men.

And yes she is damaged (like so many people around the world who are damaged by their life experiences).

 

Now, the interesting thing is she has some pride left (in her own words)

and this is why she does not have multiple sponsors-boyfriend etc.... and why she refuses to tell big lies (except the little ones so she does not have to hurt someone.....)

or to scam etc.......

 

But, if she stays in the bars, one day her self-esteem will be gone and so she will be the same as many other BG who already reached this point.

 

my 2 satangs