Old Hippie Posted July 27, 2006 Report Share Posted July 27, 2006 Just a general question here, say you had a teenage daughter, and some GUY was playing these types of games, what would your advice be to your daughter? what if she was 25, had known the guy for 1-2 years...? Would you tell her to stay in there and take more of this crap? or is it a differenty story if it is your daughter? Discuss... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sanddawg1 Posted July 27, 2006 Report Share Posted July 27, 2006 I agree with you OH!! The reason I won't let a TG/BG fuck me over is because I've had so much practice getting fucked over by farang women. OUCH Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Hippie Posted July 27, 2006 Report Share Posted July 27, 2006 Thank you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MaiLuk Posted July 27, 2006 Report Share Posted July 27, 2006 OH: If you are not willing to take any crap from a girl, then you will never have a relationship. Nothing wrong with that, especially if you are in LOS where endless pussy and flings can be had. Rships can be real hassle and get in the way of what you want to do. But if you choose to enter into a rt with a thai girl, as you and i know the crap will show up sooner or later. If your attitude is "any crap occurs i'm outta here", you would be better off not wasting time starting the rt to begin with. OTOH, if you do end up with a girl who would never do anything wrong, i suspect this docile girl would cause you to die of boredom and again the rt would be over in a hurry. Bottom line is no rts for you. The other side of the coin is, do we have a right to expect a girl to put up with any crap from us? Or are we angels and never step out of line so no need to consider that. Yep. We're Angels. Would never do anything to anger our GFs. And at the same time we are "real men". Makes alot of sense. If you are anything like me you will push the envelope with your girlfriend. Especially in the early stages. See how strong that bond is. I know alot of girls do the same. Is rorian man enough to handle such a girl? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigD Posted July 27, 2006 Author Report Share Posted July 27, 2006 I am taking each post into consideration OH. Excuse me if I don't make an immediate decision based on a couple posts because I do love this lady. Making hasty decisions is not what I would consider wise, especially since this would be a life long choice I have to live with. I have however decided to distance my emotions to keep myself safe for the time being so she won't "bite" me so hard if it comes to that. Yes the trust is gone now. I had no reason to doubt her before. I just happened to glance at her phone when she was with me at gullivers since she seemed so occupied with it and didn't notice I was standing right beside her. I'm in no way saying I'm perfect or that I expect her to be perfect. I'm just saying her actions seem questionable lately. I would like a chance to try to correct it before "dumping her to the curb" so to speak. Yes a lot of times the same "shit" is posted over and over again but I do want to hear the wisdom of the more experienced posters since I have not been in the game as long. I'll admit that I'm mainly looking for suggestions on how to clarify/correct my current position with her. BTW OH, I did not read your post on alternative nicknames. Though I'm glad I avoided trouble by announcing that this is an alt. If you or any other wish to here my reasons I can PM them, if it really is that important to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MaiLuk Posted July 27, 2006 Report Share Posted July 27, 2006 R: >>I have however decided to distance my emotions to keep myself safe for the time being so she won't "bite" me so hard if it comes to that.<< Sounds like a very reasonable approach but if you are living to gether i doubt you will distance yourself emotionally. You may find yourself getting more and more bent out of shape. When I was dealing with a thai girl here in the states who was getting on my nerves with her bullshit games trying to make me jealous, I bought a ticket to thailand and told her the day before i was leaving LOL. When i got back she had moved out. Now that is distancing one self emotionally. Not suggesting you do or don't do something similar. Good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Hippie Posted July 27, 2006 Report Share Posted July 27, 2006 "...BTW OH, I did not read your post on alternative nicknames. Though I'm glad I avoided trouble by announcing that this is an alt. If you or any other wish to here my reasons I can PM them, if it really is that important to you...." No explanation necessary. Mailuk wrote: "...The other side of the coin is, do we have a right to expect a girl to put up with any crap from us? Or are we angels and never step out of line so no need to consider that. Yep. We're Angels. Would never do anything to anger our GFs. And at the same time we are "real men". Makes alot of sense..." Yeah, valid point. Once the relationship is established, it has to be a 50-50 effort to make it work. The OP is claiming he doesn't go out, yet gets accussed of doing so so. She obviously does not trust him, now, he has reason to not trust her. So, the games have started, the trust is gone. We areall in agreement that a relationship will fail without trust, so...the answer seems obvious. Again, I have to ask, if this was your daughter, what would you tell her? or your son? My guess is, we would all be a lot more hard nosed in our answers, and far less willing to philosophize here...I know I would... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zaad Posted July 27, 2006 Report Share Posted July 27, 2006 OH, Rorian's words below are the reason I disagree with you. I'm in no way saying I'm perfect or that I expect her to be perfect. I'm just saying her actions seem questionable lately. Yes the trust is gone now. I had no reason to doubt her before. No distrust in the past, but things have changed. IMO the least amount of respect this girl deserves according to her good behavior throughout their relationship would be to give her the opportunity for clarification. There are situations where one does not qualify for a second chance, but this is clearly not one of them, NOT as long as we don't have all the facts. I mean..that's how I personally value my relationships. Glad to see there are some real men on this board who agree with me. In my book real men face the problem before considering step 2. They would certainly not run away from it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Hippie Posted July 27, 2006 Report Share Posted July 27, 2006 Zaad, You over looked the part where he said he never cheated on her, yet she has accused him of it, he may HAVE trusted her, but she has not trusted him. This is one of my reasons for the harsh reactions here. To me, her suspecting him, and her recent behavior (I am sure if he reexamines it, then he will see there WERE other times as well) seem to indicate that she is up to something. In any event, there is/was no trust on her part to him, and now his trustin her is gone...so why drag it out, and go through more of the same? I do see a familiar pattern emerging in the OP already...he is getting ready to blame himself here, just wait, it will happen...then the rest of the all to familiar pattern will begin. One thing I am not clear on, where is this girl from? and what is her occupation and background? The other issue I have with this is, would this girl try this with a Thai guy? My guess is, she, and others like her, may be relying on the farang sense of forgiveness, gullibility, stupid sense of desparation many of us have in these situations, and the lack of violence we demonstrate in problem solving. Face it, a Thai guy would slap the crap out of her if he suspected wrong doing. In any event, I definitely think these girls try more shit with farangs... "... In my book real men face the problem before considering step 2. They would certainly not run away from it..." Wer can agree to disagree. To me, problem with a woman? get rid of the problem, and move on...problem solved. Life is too short for bullshit games. Oddly, I have had a few relationships that didn't have all the dramatic crap and games... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Hippie Posted July 27, 2006 Report Share Posted July 27, 2006 J & Saunk A lie is a lie no matter if itâ??s about something â??trivialâ? or not. If she will lie about something trivial its only a matter of time until trivial turns into major and she lies about that too. When does it end? It will only end when you are strong enough to make it end. The problem with putting up with a little bit of crap is that it never ends. You take a bit, then decide o.k. it was just once, then some more, and make another excuse, then again and another, then you say well, I've been with her for xyz amount of time...we can work through it...then it just is too much. Best to cut it off early, and move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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