panadolsandwich Posted May 28, 2007 Report Share Posted May 28, 2007 Ok so it went pretty well over there, now I want her to come home with me. I read the following article by Khunsanuk on Thai/Western relationships: http://www.thai360.com/fbb/showtopic.php?tid/518045/ I scored fairly highly on most counts. I was certainly accepted well by her family. For those who haven't (or won't) read the article - it basically describes fairly well the need for role playing in Thai/Western relationships. It says in this culture you are the man, she is the woman - none of this sexual equality crap. To me it was a breath of fresh air. Noone would dare write that here in sunny Brisbane. I did most things right - for instance only buying small gifts for the family. Laos whiskey for the Dad. Groceries for the Mum. They were extending the house at the time (courtesy of a Korean in law). I helped out with that by doing some labour (token really) - and from the article - apparently saving them face. I got to tool around town in the family late model Honda CRV. They laughed their heads off when I wandered off on my own once, only to be claimed by another family (I think they were happy to have me back - as was I). They genuinely seemed to accept me as part of the family - no question of that. So now I want her to come home with me. She is a smart girl, but very lazy. She is very sociable and will make friends with almost anyone, sometimes to my chagrin. She has a good sense of humour and is remarkably placid while traveling which consoles me immensely (I'm the opposite when traveling). She unquestionably plays the role of the woman; gracefully serving me - doing my laundry and ironing and other such things. She is absolutely bonkers about me, totally and almost embarrassingly in love with me. I've got no doubt about this. Sorry this sounds intolerably smug. I got this job in Cairns. But will be on a roster of 9 on and 5 off. What I want to ask you guys is what the hell she is going to do on my 9 on? My thoughts are she should study. Although it wouldn't be inconceivable to just take her along with me. My biggest fear is she will be bored beyond comprehension. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cavanami Posted May 28, 2007 Report Share Posted May 28, 2007 She will... - watch TV - phone her friends - eat - maybe do emails? ...take it from here... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ckrisg Posted May 29, 2007 Report Share Posted May 29, 2007 Being left on her own for 9 days will cause her serious problems. Thais are very social people as no doubt you will have seen when she was with family and friends. You need to think about this, its just too long. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
panadolsandwich Posted May 29, 2007 Author Report Share Posted May 29, 2007 Yeah that's why I'm thinking she should come with me. I could certainly arrange it - but wouldn't be ideal. She'd still be fairly bored there I believe. I'd love to get her to work but that would be highly illegal. I'll probably just end up taking her with me, but I hope to christ someone can think of a better idea!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pescator Posted May 29, 2007 Report Share Posted May 29, 2007 I believe you think too mutt If she wants to make this work as much as you do, she should show some initiative as well. Kinda funny how so many posters in here want to put their thai gf on a piedestal. You wanna make her feel good, be comfy? Fine, then make her tell you what her interests are, if she - most likely - tells you she has none, suggest some to her. Besides from the obvious ones taking care of the home while you are away working. Being bored in my book beats the Hell outta doing painstaiking rice planting or the like. cheers hn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MooNoi Posted May 30, 2007 Report Share Posted May 30, 2007 I believe you think too mutt If she wants to make this work as much as you do, she should show some initiative as well. Kinda funny how so many posters in here want to put their thai gf on a piedestal. You wanna make her feel good, be comfy? Fine, then make her tell you what her interests are, if she - most likely - tells you she has none, suggest some to her. Besides from the obvious ones taking care of the home while you are away working. Being bored in my book beats the Hell outta doing painstaiking rice planting or the like. cheers hn Good points, Snakey... but IMO you can tell the girl you want to bring all you like about life in your own country and things that she can do, but if she's never been there it must be incredibly hard for the girl to visualise what life will be like. Also, the guy is asking the girl to "see the big picture" and think about the future which isn't exactly a trait that Thais are well-known for... especially if she comes from the P4P scene: "Live for today, worry about tomorrow when it comes." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
panadolsandwich Posted May 30, 2007 Author Report Share Posted May 30, 2007 I believe you think too mutt If she wants to make this work as much as you do, she should show some initiative as well. Kinda funny how so many posters in here want to put their thai gf on a piedestal. You wanna make her feel good, be comfy? Fine, then make her tell you what her interests are, if she - most likely - tells you she has none, suggest some to her. Besides from the obvious ones taking care of the home while you are away working. Being bored in my book beats the Hell outta doing painstaiking rice planting or the like. cheers hn Lol! It's funny that you should say rice planting because it was only a couple of weeks ago she was bitching about having to do that. Somehow it was my fault, although jokingly said. She is interested in making it work - I'm sure of that - if only because of the future avoidance of work. I know she likes reading those comics that TG's love so much - you know the ones where there are this young couple on the cover, clearly in love? I'm considering ordering a shitload of these. Also I'm investigating getting some type of Thai television linked up (has ITV sunk yet?). Of other concerns is food provisions. I was very happily surprised by the range and superb quality of seafood up in Cairns - however mundane things like fish sauce will obviously have to be imported from somewhere. I'm trying to do all this while I get set up in my new job and handle all the paperwork involved in visas and the like. I'm determined to get her here, but not naive enough to believe she will adapt all that well - especially when I'm away at work. She will have to look after all the housework, laundry, cooking and all of that - but it probably won't amount to that much. Luckily she already has a friend nearby she can talk to. We'll see I suppose, but any advise would be appreciated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeartThais Posted May 30, 2007 Report Share Posted May 30, 2007 no matter what you do, she's gonna get bored eventually. And then it'll be up to her whether she lives miserably or finds a gig to bed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
panadolsandwich Posted May 30, 2007 Author Report Share Posted May 30, 2007 no matter what you do, she's gonna get bored eventually. And then it'll be up to her whether she lives miserably or finds a gig to bed. Well that's a downright sullen judgment Mr HeartThais! Things ain't working at home son? You fucking bitter bastard! Even if I could pretend for one single moment that you were just being extremely cynical - it wouldn't matter the faintest. You're being incredibly insulting anyway. I actually hope this bitterness is of a practical nature - that you were fleeced in some way. Wouldn't surprise me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mattwasp Posted May 30, 2007 Report Share Posted May 30, 2007 I guess HeartThais' comment was one of stereotype rather than directly designed to be insulting.. as has already been said, Thais are sociable people, and she'll be away from home - so if you're serious you've got to work really hard to put her needs first. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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