Little massage gal spreading her wings?

[Encore]

Reading back my own account from a few weeks ago, I think the writing came on the wall then when she quoted that song:

 

> a line from a LukThoung song "I want to be your loved one, I don't want to be your "adultress" (The one who makes you an adulterer).<

 

She's come to the realisation that indeed I would never be available for her as sole friend/husband, that the highest she could possibly ever aspire to be with me was Mia Noi. She's young enough still to have hopes for a farang husband, but she also was aware of our growing affection.

The longer it continued, the greater the dilemma would become, the harder the fall. I had similar fears, I have been trying to avoid a situation like this from developing ever since my break-up with "Nok" in 2002. This one crept up on me, maybe because she was so unlike NOK, so naive and innocent to start off with.

 

She also realised that while our daliance lasted, it would get in the way of her developing other relations with potential.

 

 

After reading through this morning what I posted, I realized that the parting yesterday was faked, and I didn't want to leave on a false note. Also, I decided overnight we were Not going to have this little three night trip together next week, and then go on fucking once a week, it needed a honest conclusion and parting, which could not be done by phone.

 

So I phoned, suggested we meet on the beach, not hotel, not MP, not for sex but for talk.

I explained I realised we needed to call it quits, for all the good reason, and I didn't want to do so on a sour note. I acknowledged my affection for her, my resolve that I would never leave my marriage, and my understanding she needed more.

She admitted it was mostly about that. The young man may have been triggering things, but she had serious doubt that would ever go anywhere.

He's coming in 3 months for a month, he expects her to take tiem off work at 500 Bt per day, her boss has made clear "NoWAY!". She won't jeopardise her job. He'll sit around and fume while she works (even if she'd only dish out HJ's), and probably use his spare time to go fuck hookers elsewhere (like last visit).

 

To make matters more fragile, next month her geriatric German is coming back for a month, and likely to choose her for his main carer. He only requires company and an occasional HJ, and pays her 2K per day (not sure what the MP's cut of that is). But during that month, she want be able to take his 11.00PM usual phonecall, which sometimes takes half an hour or so. She anticipates that may drive him over the edge before the month is up.

 

Well, I hope she survives the ride, I'm bailing out. With regret, I admit.

 

We arranged that i will take her to hospital for her and my jabs late April, just to make absolutely sure she does it (It's been paid for already).

 

We parted sadly, but friends rather then fake cheer.

[sanddawg1]

Ikky

 

I would like to sincerely thank you for sharing your experiences with the board. Setting in the middle of the desert in a warzone with little entertainment I always look forward to the next installment of your excellently written adventures. I look forward to buying you a beer someday.

 

Hope you have another romance soon!!!

 

S1

 

[Encore]

I bloody well don't hope so!

 

I'm pissed off with myself for letting it come so far. Should have cut 3 months ago! It was a lovely experience, but kind of bittersweet.

The hangover isn't so lovely, and will last a while I think.

 

Oh, well, off to BKK to spend the night with she who rhymes with NamKeng, from Tulips. Should ease the pain a bit.

 

But thanks for the kind words.

[Faustian]

Is this really the end?

 

I'm not so sure.

 

And how honest have you or Noi been?

 

Do you think she loves you? I know how you feel about her...

[Hugh_Hoy]

Honest to themselves...or honest to each other? Or both?

 

Hmmmmm...I've decided that Ikky is "infatuated" vs. "in love".

 

I decided long ago that the criteria defining "love" amongst comparatively well-off Westerners and poor Thais are not the same.

 

HH

[Encore]

>And how honest have you or Noi been?

 

Do you think she loves you? I know how you feel about her...<

 

Does she love me?

 

I don't know, to quote a former GF (MsXX) "I don't know what love is, I can't afford to think about luxuries like love. i must feed my child and parents, and will do what it needs to do that, even if I have to marry a 60 year old farang whom I don't love"

 

Noi and I grew affectionate, partly due to the intimacy of frequent intense sex, partly because I was one of her few clients who could speak to her in her language (initially she had only five words of english), partly because of her sense gratitude or obligation to me for helping her in many ways. I was a.f.a.i.k. her first regular FS customer, and one of her longest, almost certainly the closest.

 

I don't use the word 'love' lightly, reserve it for very longtime relationships and maybe children. I don't think I love her, I feel very protective of her and very affectionate, plus I was a bit infatuated (fading fast).

 

I think if I wasn't married, she'd do her utmost to get me, in spite of age difference, but maybe not out of love, but out of need for security, and knowing I'm not to bad a guy to be with. She'd outlive me in 20 years or so and then have made her family secure for life. That's family obligation. If the western mind would require her to swear undying love to attain that target, she'd do it (I think).

 

I probably would never let it get that far, she's very sweet, but i'd rapidly get bored to tears. Having a little romance on the side with whom you spend a few hours a week and an occasional hot night together, is quite different from being married to a girl who could be your granddaughter, a world apart in education levels and world view, culture etc.

 

It is ironic, I used to have long PM exchanges with a former board member, my age, who was involved with an 18 yr old SC gogo dancer, where I put all the questions of doubt in the sustainability of a relation with the girl he was contemplating leaving his wife for.

 

Is it really the end?

 

Fucked if i know.......

 

[Encore]

Back to farangcountry for 5 weeks. A couple of days before, after I hadn't seen her for a few weeks, I decided to drop in for just a massage and see if the itch was still the same.

Her oil massage skills have improved over the year (Well, last 5 months I simply never got a massage anymore, too busy otherwise.) She offered a HJ, I said "You still don't fuck?", her reply "No FS client now for 3 weeks. Only HJ!"

So I said, HJ OK, but take off your clothes then.

"Only top", she said.

"Why, I could still munch you, that doesn't mean we'd have to fuck" (A Clinton's solution)

"No, she said, cannot. If you eat me, I get horney, I know if I horney then I want to fuck. I don't want to Chiao Chu my BF"

 

That actually raised her in my esteem. She's serious about this faithfulness, a rare honest woman.

 

HJ was OK, especially spiced up with the taste of her cute little tits.

 

But afterwards, I had to admit the strong pull of a month and more earlier was fading.

 

We had a nice chat afterwards. She said some regular clients now didn't come back, so she earns less. But loverboy had sent his next modest contribution on time, and she was content.

 

Well, if she can manage, good on her. Still not sure what she'll do when the geriatric Gillaman arrives....

 

A week later in farangland, a txt from a totally freaked out loverboy. "Please, please pick up your mail from me (I'd put him on ignore earlier)

"I am going crazy, I don't know what to do, I need your help. I told her I know she lied, she's crying hysterically, now I don't know anything".

 

Being bored in farangland, I conceded, and read his mails.

 

Oh Boy!

 

He'd read a few comments from cynical other farang, who didn't believe a MP would not cheat him. He got paranoid, and contacted an investigation service in pattaya. he paid them 5K Bt, they'd sent a ("Undercover") guy to the MP to try her on. The guy reported back that upstairs, during Oil massage, she'd asked him if he wanted a HJ or a BJ. He said "how about FS?", she replied, "cannot, boss forbid".

"Do you go with clients after hours?"

"Sometimes"

"OK, maybe tomorrow I contact you and we go to my hotel".

 

Then the guy went home, wrote his report for loverboy, who freaked. The gy said "YOU MUST NOT tell ehr about tis, but if you want, I can go back tomorrow, and take her to a hotel, get photos etc , so you know for sure. You just have to send a bit more money.

 

So what does loverboy do?

 

Yes, he phones her, accuses her of offering a BJ and a hotel visit, call her names, rants and raves.

She cries, denies. He doesn't know what's going on, he panics. Finally, tries to contact me (not knowing i'm in farangland).

 

I looked at the PI's report. It didn't ring true.

 

She absolutely hates BJ, always has.

 

My first time with her, 8 months or so ago, when she was new, she offered a HJ during Oil massage. I pointed at her mouth, and said BJ OK?

She shook her had, said "I don't do that. But do you mean you want sex?"

I said sure!

She Quickly shed her clothes and climbed aboard, without blingking an eye.

 

 

A few weeks later, I arrived during her 'men'. She couldn't /wouldn't f..k then, so I begged a BJ. She did, only as exception because of her 'men'. But it was very poor, and obviously not enjoyed by her, so I cut it short.

 

A few times over the past six month only tried again, but I knew she was very reluctant. In fact, after the fvisit to the Dr she had said "I will not do any BJ with customer now. Only you when I have men".

 

This makes me seriously doubt the story of the guy who reported on her. Also, the 'stay the night with customer. She had made very clear to me that she didn't want to stay the night with anyone anymore, around the time we called it quits last month. She said the griatric Gillaman was a different matter, her job there was really more like an old age carer, a rare HJ but nothing ever else then that. A few weeks earlier, around the time we decided to stop f...g, I was home alone. we had cancelled the trip away, she had a day and 2 nights off, could not sleep or watch TV daytime, and would be bored stiff sitting on the beach. I'd phoned her, said, "If you want to spend your free days with me, watch TV, no sex, just quiet place, that's OK."

 

She said "Can I think and call yo back?"

 

Sure. She called back " I cannot. I know if I come and stay with you, at some time I will have sex, because maybe I want to. Better I stay here."

Knowing how dreary her work environment is as a place to live, She had made a hard decision.

 

My guess is the investigator had recognised a sucker in loverboy, and assumed he'd send another 5k Bt for an effort to sleep with Noi. His story simply didn't stack up.

 

I told Loverboy my conclusion, he sounded relieved. In the days following, he wrote more about the conversations with her, his plans. He seems 100% determined to keep supporting her in his modest way until he can support her fully and make her stop work altogether. He's calmer now, and seems more resigned to the current situation. He's a fulltime tertiary student, and has a job to provide income that fills all his spare hours.

 

I give it maybe 20% chance of succeeding, but admire his tenacity, and her integrity. It gives me yet a little hope there are some good ones out there.

[dave32]

I give it maybe 20% chance of succeeding, but admire his tenacity, and her integrity. It gives me yet a little hope there are some good ones out there.

 

Like your tale here Ikkrang. Instead of Aesop's fables, we should open up a section and call it Ikkrang's fables. He'll tell you how the story should go.

 

 

There's still some good ones out there. And a lot of blah ones that are too jaded or too dead inside.

 

This story makes me smile. Both characters are kinda goofy, but it would be nice to see them succeed. He seems to be living for a romantic ideal and raw emotion right now, and she is living for an ideal too (and also probably a very real survival instinct). When they've been together a couple years and the slow grind of that life grates against the passion... then, it's always interesting to revisit.

 

Keep up the good writing sir. Yeah.

[Encore]

Back from farangland, couldn't resist revisiting the scene of the crime.

 

Order has been re-established in the realm. The various forces of nature are now once again in equilibrium, all is well with the universe.

 

Certain accommodations made, readjusted to new realities. Market reigns.

 

On counsel of my spiritual advisor, I have decided to postpone any further reporting until such time as a major shift of realities takes place. The occurrence of this cannot be predicted.

 

But all of you who may have followed this saga, rest assured, all is well in the universe.

[Faustian]

Wow! Could you be more vague?

 

Updates are required! All is well in the universe doesn't quite cut it. :content:

 

Cheers.