Guest Posted March 29, 2002 Report Share Posted March 29, 2002 HI Old Hippie, Looking at another culture - the Indian culture totally puts it at the other end - ie. the girl's family will pay a dowry to YOU (yes I am not drunk - remember i only drink SPY)... because the reasoning is you'll be taking care of her for the rest of your life. Sounds strange? NOT. Now the sad truth is most of the people in India will tend to curse when they got a baby girl. Thus, there are numerous unrecorded killings of female babies or torture because it becomes a future bane and cost. Conclusion is paying the dowry as a man is reasonable enough. Totally not in favour of the other way round. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Hippie Posted March 29, 2002 Report Share Posted March 29, 2002 Yeah, I was familiar with that custom I agree that it causes problems things like wife burning, abuse, murder etc...I just don't really like the idea of paying for a bride, but I suppose they are never really free:) I don't see a problem of laying it out for show, as long as you get it back! I can also see helping her parents out in their old age as well. But just handing money over doesn't cut it in my book. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pattaya127 Posted March 29, 2002 Report Share Posted March 29, 2002 Stick wrote: And yes, I agree, there are many Thais out there who DO RESPECT the farangs unwillingness to pay. Cynicism prevents me from saying that many of these who DEMAND the dowry appear to be ex bar girl families....oops, just said it! Stick --------------------------------- said it, And well, stick! Who said tourists destroy the culture they visit and can't revive old traditions? LOL!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
khunsanuk Posted March 29, 2002 Report Share Posted March 29, 2002 Hi, "It also would make sense to me, as otherwise you better bring enough money in case you need it. However, I was told different (which does not mean that this is normal). Like I said, I was never asked for anything it was fully up to me." Oh well, regional differences I suppose. "For two reasons IMO: because especially poor families would expct that they are allowed to keep it (from a farang)." I would say this depends a lot on the family. I paid the equivalent of about 1 years income (theirs), and they could certainly have used the money. It was however returned, and even now my wife constantly gets reprimanded by her mother for spending too much of my money on them. For instance, mother complained that there was no need to buy 2 ceiling fans (one is for our room), they did not need one and there was no need to waste so much money. The fan costs ~1,000 Baht. So, I don't think this is related to being poor or not, but rather to being honest or not. (Not implying your inlaws are not honest of course since I have no idea what the deal was you and them had.) "And because (personally) I thougt, what I gave was OK." This of course is a fair comment. I, too, had not really expected the money back, and was OK with that. Getting it back was therefore a nice surprise, and a sign to me that they were not interested in my money. Sanuk! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 29, 2002 Report Share Posted March 29, 2002 Thaihome -- My reference were no more directed at your good person than your cheap shot to me, khun shoefitter; more a collective statement on general activity in this area dealing with sketchy people. ?The contempt for Thais and Thailand that is often expressed on board sometimes astounds me?. --- with good reason after being duped, cheated, lied to and swindled. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 29, 2002 Report Share Posted March 29, 2002 How much does an average Thai guy pay in dowry to mary his wife - Surely not 300,000b? And if your wife is not going to marry you, or at the least resent you for not paying enough, then is she really the kind of girl you want to be with, with those principles? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 30, 2002 Report Share Posted March 30, 2002 a) a Thai wouldn?t pay a single baht for a bg. what does that tell us? be with, play around, OK. marry? waste of time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soongmak Posted March 30, 2002 Report Share Posted March 30, 2002 Quote: >>>Personally I find all this talk about background, class, etc rather offending. I mean this is your wife you are talking about and you are attempting to value (or devalue for you cheapskates) based on her merits or demerits. If she has been previously married, comes from Issan, why are you marrying her if you think these things devalue her? <<< What is your problem? For as far as I am concerned, putting a price on the one you love is pretty repulsive anyway. If you consider the fact that you paid no more for your wife than for a second hand toyota corrolla with lots of mileage on it, I can not fathom how you can think you are all above this. Cheers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 30, 2002 Report Share Posted March 30, 2002 Post deleted by DoxyBlue Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 30, 2002 Report Share Posted March 30, 2002 give me the Toyota . . . anyday. something i can rely on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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