Guest Posted June 4, 2002 Report Share Posted June 4, 2002 GTG, I have just spent the last 30 minutes reading every post of that discussion and I think you are definitely in the wrong...I think you finally found the "subject" that you wanted to argue and you gunned down all in your way so you get your "complete" invalid point across.... Maybe it was a tough day or days at the office and you needed to vent, but this new post proves it is targeted and deliberate attempt to tarnish 2 people....In addition you sometimes stated your english was bad due to non-native english speakers on this board...that I find difficult to believe... Someone called it correctly, if you removed BG and placed TG in Thalenoi's orignial post would you have had a problem?...by you choosing not to reply it implied that was the case....in fact you would probably be saying what a jaidee guy he is..... Thalenoi good luck on your future endavours in Chumpon.. Sanukboot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thalenoi Posted June 4, 2002 Report Share Posted June 4, 2002 GTG, I have revisited the original thread. BassGod was asking questions on the money side of our relationship, I did not give that aspect much thoughts and was trying to minimize financial impact (a male thing to do?) That's where you stepped in with following comment: >thalenoi >On my return, she will join me at the airport and I promised to buy her a pair of shoes and a watch. So funny to see her thrilled with expectation for all that candy... >.....that's why you love this Thai girl...........so easy to please. Throwing a few bugs and she is grateful. >Couldn't do that with a farang gf back home, eh? <Too demanding, bad attitude - you say. >But actually MORE EXPENSIVE >GTG. Would you agree this is the moment where this thread was heading to the wrong direction? The additional cost to my Thai budget caused by Mee's presence is 150.000 baht over six months = 25.000 baht/month. Now the value of money is relative to anyone depending on many factors. I think you are badly placed to make any judgement on what that represents for Thalenoi as an individual, but you might have a good idea on what this represents for a Thai person. >So funny to see her thrilled with expectation for all that candy... .that's why you love this Thai girl...........so easy to please. >Throwing a few bugs and she is grateful. I the western world it is difficult to find a present that pleases the other party, they have everything already. My son just bought himself a GPS device, this allows him to find any street anywhere on the planet, provided he downloads the right map for hours. Life saving device for him indeed. How could he ever find his way back home before having that thing is a mystery to me. Therefore Mee's enthousiasm for getting a pair of shoes or a watch is refreshing, I will not run out off ideas soon. >that's why you love this Thai girl...........so easy to please. Absolutely nothing to do with why I love that Thai girl. It's her character that's a perfect fit to my personality. I mentionned this before: she is quit, introvert, does not like to talk, hates socialising, loves to joke, easy going, hates arguments, is sweet, caring, intelligent, likes nature, walking, biking, wants to teach me Thai and learn English (you do need to invest much of your time for this) most importantly, she is secret, I hate "open book" personalities. >Throwing a few bugs and she is grateful. >Couldn't do that with a farang gf back home, eh? I don't need her to be grateful. It's good to see her happy in a noodle shop, walking on the beach or playing in the waves of the sea. I have no need to throw a few bucks to a farang gf "back home" because I don't want any farang gf and where is "back home" for me? Chumpon wishful thinking? >Too demanding, bad attitude - you say. >But actually MORE EXPENSIVE A farang gf you mean? I only had problems with one, she thought I was her property. Slavery is no longer with us I hope. The others used to pay for me. (not with money, but dinners, presents, holidays) I have alway found it wrong to "subsidize" woman. They have a career in the western world, at least the ones I had relationships with. In fact, I am breaking a rule of mine with Mee. So, do we have this thread rolling now? See you after crossing the Atlantic tomorrow? Btw, I am going to visit an ex-gf in Montreal, and no we don't sleep together, she is however on the shortlist of 5 human beings I care for. Everyone should have such a short list. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bibblies Posted June 4, 2002 Report Share Posted June 4, 2002 I must have (perhaps deliberately?) missed this thread - I've spent over 6 months with a bargirl! In answer to your previous question - yes, "cheap" is much stronger and more insulting than the Thai equivalent. In future, just follow my English and you won't get into trouble . I always suspect that there's more a seam of jealousy and tacit support of the Thai class system to be found behind your "good girl" posts rather than feminism. Why else would one hate the choice of any girl, whatever her background, to make "easy" money from sexual services? Yes, she's going against convention. But she's making money, having fun and, I venture, having more interesting experiences than she would in a typically stifling good Thai girl life. That's feminism - being unconstrained by convention. The bad girl with whom I live has an older sister who is university-educated, with a respectable office job. She's nice enough yet, often, I find myself despising many aspects of her "good girl" existence. (Read on - it's not simply because she won't jump into bed with me!) Unlike her younger sibling, she's unambitious, unknowing and apathetic about the world around her. In contrast to her sister, she knows nothing of cuisines other than Thai and, even when pressed, is extremely reluctant to even try. Not only does she not know what pasta (for example) is, but recently, she didn't recognise a vibrator when she saw one (neither did she know or could guess its purpose). Now that's pretty sad for a 26 year-old! Dirty jokes on TV and in movies leave her mystified.Oral sex? What's that? Every night she goes nowhere, does nothing. Like her sister, she's got a fine set of knockers, but she wouldn't dream of wearing anything tighter or more revealing than a tent. Her husband wouldn't allow it anyway. She's constrained by cultural conventions. She's been nowhere and knows nothing about the world. Her sister, on the other hand, has been to many places and learned many things. (She has also discovered the liberating glory of getting drunk at the weekend and not caring about what other people think. ) You'll probably never admit it, but I think you (and many other Thai girls) secretly covet such an interesting and liberated existence. Let's face it, the way things are going here, with the increasing acceptance of Western values, you could say that they're actually ahead of you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goodthaigirl Posted June 5, 2002 Author Report Share Posted June 5, 2002 Guys, Thanks for all the posts. This thread is creating the result that I wanted. I just want people to spill out their thought on the thread RE 6 month. because I feel it is an unfinished business. I'll reply over the weekend. It will take me all day I guess. Just like writing a paper ! GTG Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 5, 2002 Report Share Posted June 5, 2002 [color:blue]>that's why you love this Thai girl...........so easy to please. Absolutely nothing to do with why I love that Thai girl.color=blue> Really? I agree with most everything else you said and think GTG was way off the mark. However, I think you're probably being disingenuous here. I think most of us find this aspect of being with BGs (and TGs in general) quite entertaining and envigorating. Many of us have become jaded and dulled to many aspects of our lives and take an awful lot for granted. Being around people who are relatively easily entertained or pleased is quite refreshing and makes all of us appreciate our lives much more. This is why it is also so much fun being with small children; take a small child to see Superman and it is the best movie he's ever seen! Take a farang date to see it and it'll just be ho-hum, yet another movie. If this were the only thing going for a relationship, the infatuation would soon diminish as the girl (in this case) gets pulled further into the world of her mate and the novelty wears off. But that's not to say that this can't be one nice thing to get the relationship off to a running start. GTGs characterization was deliberately a little demeaning to both the girl and you, Thalenoi. There is truly nothing wrong with enjoying making other people happy, especially when it requires little effort or cost on your part. I would rather make a thousand small children happy with gifts of cheap toys than one well-off thai girl happy with expensive jewelry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
think_too_mut Posted June 5, 2002 Report Share Posted June 5, 2002 GTG, I am in the same boat as Cent, Phoenix, Thalenoi.... I don't really remember the original thread but if "feminism" was an important part of it, let me say something here. My current ex-bg gf had a lesbian woman customer/lover a year ago and I met her once. A world-class executive from a respectable US institution. One question I asked her was - what makes her love Thai girls. She replied - "farang girls are same as me, they fly jumbo jets, compete ruthlessly in every walk of life...we are getting more like men. I want a woman!" At the same time, the girl we both loved was not unambitious, apathic, ignorant...she's more like somebody who's seen and tried different things...Well, the price could have been a bit high - her experiences came along with being a bar girl. But she has gotten where she wanted to be, the bar is behind her... Not that I am saying "who hasn't worked the bar knows a shit" but I can see my gf displaying far more than ordinary street smarts. Take her English as an example, that is a skill in Thailand. Just yesterday, her mother for upcountry rang her and asked to visit 3yrs older sister and report back on how is she coping with her job in some factory. Also to make sure she's been eating and sleeping properly....I would expect the opposite - the older one to look after the younger sister... Just reread the original thread. Somewhere it was said that tgs don't complain about presents as they can't be returned if they are not liked or don't fit...Not my experience (5 months with ex-bg). Shoes, tops, skirts...being returned for different size/color...A pair of 501s refused - "honey, no like...", I am wearing them now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goodthaigirl Posted June 9, 2002 Author Report Share Posted June 9, 2002 Hi everybody, I?m attempting to answer all the posts in one go. Here we go. First, I?d like to apologise Thalenoi to have used the ?wrong? word to him. Many guys told me that the word is too stronger than the Thai meaning I thought it was equivalent (¡Ãèá). Next time, I will consult you guys on the ?Language? section. So, which word should I use them? My questions to Thalenoi was my way to learn here. He ?declared? his ?success? to his relationship with an ex-bg. How can we fully appreciate it if he omitted an important piece of info not to mention didn?t tell the full story??? Is it fair for the readers? If you want to share a story like this and don?t want to reveal your identity maybe you should register on another name. I don?t? like people who mislead other people. Phoenix said. ?maybe where you went wrong was to personalize your comments too much.? I?m not sure what he meant by the word personalise. If it means I made the tread become the argument between Thalenoi and me, YES- because he posted his story and I posted my arguments and it went back and forth and what ?s wrong with that? I like your SINCERE story and comments. Keep up the good work. Cent: You asked me to answer our question from the thread ?6 month..? which was it I was rich how I could be sure to know the bf loved me for me, not the money. You suggested that I should take my time to see how the potential mate behaved over time., etc. Yes, what your point? Your scenario is not compatible to this case because you should have said that I was married because in reality Thalenoi?s married. Any way, to answer your question, yes, he is taking his time. But she isn't getting anywhere because Thalenoi is married. Her security is not as secure as getting married to him, right? How long is he going to take care of her? No one even him dare not to answer? May be his wife? Many guys here look down on married Thai men because they have mia noi and younger girls on the side. But one of the moderators are doing EXACTLY the same thing. DOUBLE STANDARD ? (If you have a standard at all.) HIGH THAIED > He is also very committed to her, unlike a traditional mia-noi situation. He houses her, feeds her, and buys her things. Tell me what is a traditional mia-noi situation. I think this is exactly a traditional mia-noi situation where a well to do husband pays for everything as you said. >Sounds like she doesn't have to lift a finger. He has stated he does not fool around, But have a wife back HOME. Well?better than fooling around a bit >and has even agreed to give up beer with dinner (now THAT"S commitment ) He?s got a health problem here, remember? He's doing to himself. >If she is getting the short end of the stick here, I'm not seeing it. That ?s your problem. I?ve tried. > To put it simply......you're stereotyping. Mee as a bargirl, and Thalenoi as a punter. No, I?m just suspicious. If I?m accused of being stereotyping here, I?ve got it from THIS board. I have no other way of knowing this kind of info elsewhere, their behavior both the bgs and punters. May be I?m spending too muchof my time here . >I've always thought it better to give the benefit of the doubt when all the facts are not known. For me, I couldn?t do that. Maybe I have a curious mind, that?s why I?m here in the first place ! To be able to understand I have to ask questions. Sanukboot >Someone called it correctly, if you removed BG and placed TG in Thalenoi's orignial post would you have had a problem?...by you choosing not to reply it implied that was the case....in fact you would probably be saying what a jaidee guy he is..... I still have the problem as later we?ve found out that he?s married. Jai dee? NO, Jai rai mark bibblies >You described your bg?s sister as ?Unlike her younger sibling, she's unambitious, unknowing and apathetic about the world around her. In contrast to her sister, she knows nothing of cuisines other than Thai and, even when pressed, is extremely reluctant to even try. ? Not every good Thai girls are like that, and you know it. Are you stereotyping us? Farang Dang >Being around people who are relatively easily entertained or pleased is quite refreshing and makes all of us appreciate our lives much more. You?ve got to make sure it is the genuine feeling though. Often times we, me included, show our appreciation to someone who has bought something to us eventhough we don?t like it at all. Why? It?s just because we don?t want to hurt their feelings. I?m sure Westerners are doing the same thing. Call it ?face? , call it whatever you want. But the point is you have to be sure if you are really appreciated. Think too mut >Just yesterday, her mother for upcountry rang her and asked to visit 3yrs older sister and report back on how is she coping with her job in some factory. Also to make sure she's been eating and sleeping properly....I would expect the opposite - the older one to look after the younger sister... NOPE, you?ve got it all wrong. In this case, knowing you gf is better of by your financial support, the mother asked your gf to take care of the sis. Notice the request from the mum, ?to make sure she's been eating and sleeping properly? . If not , so what? The mum expects your gf to help her sis out. The sad thing is that the one who are the well-off is the provider, not because of being older or younger sibling if they are in the same family. In fact parents should be the provider. Some of them should be in the labor market because they are only in their 40s-50s but choose to send their daughters off to the bar or brothels and send money back to them. LEECH > Just reread the original thread. Somewhere it was said that tgs don't complain about presents as they can't be returned if they are not liked or don't fit... Not my experience (5 months with ex-bg). Shoes, tops, skirts...being returned for different size/color...A pair of 501s refused - "honey, no like...", I am wearing them now. Please read it carefully. Thalenoi bought the present from overseas, not in Thailand. So his gf might think it could not be returned, I guess all in all I feel sorry for Thalenoi?s gf. Maybe because of my ?analytical mind? that wants to get into every detail in order to fully understand and appreciate his claim of 'success story'. Got a bit shocked when I learned that he?s married because he showed so much that he treated her right and all that but he?s MARRIED. Yes, caring and marriage is two separate things. But to me to care with someone is to make it right to the end (marriage) as well. If not, you don?t care enough. I think I've got everything covered more or less here. GTG Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 9, 2002 Report Share Posted June 9, 2002 GTG, my point and my understanding of all the other posts was not having a go at your argument, but, they way you went about arguing your point of view... I don't think you really addressed this point in your last post....btw, I don't think Thalenoi mislead anyone... Sanukboot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted June 9, 2002 Report Share Posted June 9, 2002 GTG, maybe you can help me out, where did Thalenoi mislead readers? The way I understand the story was Thalenoi was letting other readers know that it IS possible to have a positive relationship with a bg or exbg.... Sanukboot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phoenix Posted June 9, 2002 Report Share Posted June 9, 2002 Thalenoi: >I don't need her to be grateful. It's good to see her happy in a noodle shop, walking on the beach or playing in the waves of the sea.< Thank you for reminding me of those experiences, thalenoi. I have often asked myself what it was that made me so fatally fascinated and attracted by her. In the end, I think my happest times had nothing to do with sex or lust, it was instead the times when I saw her genuinely happy, happy like a child, not acting for my behalf, but spontaneous. Chasing a crab across the low tide at night, and catching it, wanting it added to our sea food soup. Building sandcastles, standing in the sea, surounded by little yellow fish she was feeding with left over rice, with a smile of happiness that was real, not acted for my benefit. Gratefulness is irrelevant. Or maybe it isn't, it is me who is grateful at having had the experience of sharing those moments with her. Nobody can ever take that memory away, or degrade it by calling me cheap, immoral, exploitative or anything else. Neither can the bad memories about the end of the relation take away the good ones. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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