OK the sex is great, but then what?

[Guest]

My post "the best sex....etc" attracted many viewers.

 

It obvious that many of you are here for the BG-scene and perhaps the great and cheap available sex on offer.

 

 

 

Looking at many posts and long lines at western Embassies it is also clear that many are looking for more than just the ST's with BG's.

 

 

 

Me, I get bored real quick if I find myself in any GoGo bar around PP, SC or NP. Its all to superficial. Can't have a decent conversation because of the noise, and even without the noise conversation with the average BG is very limited. Not that I want to look down on them, but because of their limited education it will be difficult for me to connect with them on a long term basis (and I speak Thai).

 

 

 

So, my question to many of you is. what are you looking for when you decide that a particular BG is the one you want to form a LT relationship with. The good sex will fade over time (most of the time anyway), but what are then the alternatives left to make the relationship last.

 

 

 

I saw a post about farang talking amongst themselves in bars or restaurants, with a few BG's around being bored because they can't join in the conversation.

 

I see this often a farang parties, where the GF's are also just sitting next to the BF's looking bored out of their minds.

 

How long will this last before both of you are looking for someone with whom you can connect better, has the same level and types of interest, other than sex

 

 

 

 

 

 

[JAYBLOOM]

Very interesting post. Last year I was in the lobby of the Nana Hotel on a Saturday night at 1:00 AM. Every chair/couch was occupied by a single man, 50's-70's, sitting by themselves, just starring into space. They looked real bored. I was amazed by the whole scene. Here they are, in the center of the sex capital of the world on a Saturday night by themselves. It was actually quite depressing.

[whosyourdaddy]

IMHO opinion the freelancers have better english, especially the ones at hardrock, and CM2. Many of them had long term farang boyfriends and have experience with the culture and the language.. Bargirls tend never to get back , you barfine and give money for taxi, in there customer orienated services. Freelances, at least the ones looking for long term boyfriends tend to be with the farangs longer and get a better exposer to English

[Lusty]

Hi.Even I'm starting to get bored with the different girl every night scene.Mind you come december when the old ball sack is busting under pressure who knows!Seriously though on the next trip the format will be different.Apart from the first three days I will be spending a month with one in particular.The reason being same age,speaks good english and she is superb company and she keeps me out of trouble in Los(not with the police!)and the fact that I fancy her also helps.There are alot younger prettier girls but I'm starting to realise that personality plays a very large part,especially when you get to my age.

 

 

[Guest]

This is an area where I'd have to give the Philippines a real edge over Thailand. Not that places like Angeles are brimming with things to do, but I always seem to connect better over there on at least a little more than a superficial level. For BGs it means they can become multi-day keepers with some stuff done during the day (a rarity for me these days in Thailand). More like a GFE.

 

 

 

It can't be the language barrier alone, as I'm not a charmer or much of a talker, and many Thai BGs speak pretty good English. I think it has more to do with overall cultural similarities. The Philippines also has a clear advantage, IMO, if you're looking for a non-BG LTR, but there are still well-known possible pitfalls if you find it.

 

 

 

OTOH, Thailand has the better creature comforts, safer political environment and access by land to other places for good sidetrips, so recently I've been there more than the Philippines.

[Guest]

Got some answers, but not exactly what I'm looking for.

 

 

 

What I'm interested in learning is actually what the frequent short time visitor to Thailand is looking for in a relationship, when he decides on LT with a Thai BG (Get married, take her back to his country etc.)

 

 

 

IMO apart from the physical attraction (not necessarily mutual), there is often very little else. There are tremendous cultural differences, communication is limited for various reasons, few common interests outside the bedroom etc.

 

 

 

Not talking about the tourist merely chere for the ST experiences, but thousands of foreign men get married with a BG, often after knowing this girl for only a few weeks (perhaps several years some may say, but still only a few weeks together over that period).

 

 

 

 

[pattaya127]

i think your post would attract the L/T and married farangs better if posted in relationships. Just that i suspect this section is not the one they look into the most, since they are the guys who went beyond the nightlife to mate with a TG.

[Guest]

i can give you an answer from a different angle. my missus is from the same social background as most bargirls and has the same limited formal education. the base of our relationship was not the sexual part though, the sex came only after several moths going out, when it was already clear that we had a relationship.

 

that huge difference between us keeps the relationship always interesting, still after so many years so much to learn from each other. of course we don't intellectualise operas and the latest play in town (which doesn't mean that, when in europe we don't go to operas or classical concerts, we actually do when we have the chance).

 

personally, i don't think that the same interests are the thing which necessarily makes a relationship interesting, i have seen more than a few relationships where people from the same background felll apart where both partners just did not have to say anything to each other anymore.

 

my missus looks at the world from very different eyes than me, a lot to learn from that. i think that a working partnership is formed on much deeper levels than just an intellectual compatibility. that compatibility i think is anyhow not that easy to find here in thailand. i don't know that many women here even in the upper or middle classes who know how to appreciate, lets say, the joys of punkrock as well as midnight mass on christmas in an old european church, or with who i can go to an art gallery, and also go backpacking in india.

 

those things i can do, and have done with my missus.

[pattaya127]

From the thai/farang couples I know in SF, i would think that it's quite workable, the girl opens up to the new culture, learns, gets a job, makes new friends, and the guys are happy to have a little bit of Thailand with them, on top of the essential: they love her. These feelings have very little to do with intellectual compatibility, and it does not mean that they get bored. Personally, i am one to hesitate about bringing my GF here. i know my many interests back home are outside of the scope of most thai girls I meet (good or"bad"). But in thailand, I never get bored with freelancer GFs, and i have a hard time remembering what was so interesting to talk to with GTGs that i could not talk with freelancers. A lot of freelancers are more connected to farang's world, they may have travelled, their english is not the worse, their life history has been, to say the least, "interesting", and of course they are totally free to travel with you inside LOS, and spend days together. GTGs can be fine and fun too, for me it's all samesame, the meeting/interacting with a woman in a different cultural context that i find fascinating, not what's her social conditon and what scene she's in. Because this is what I naturally tend towards, , i do not have to indulge in paid sex that much, and get to meet the right women I can share special moments with.

[bibblies]

Most relationships don't have to based on intellectual compatibility or even shared interests. (For an example, think of Einstein's wife!) After all, most people can fill these gaps with friends. The only essential part to a relationship is that the two people have to care for each other. I think that's possible, even from a standing start, however different their backgrounds are. That's what these guys are looking for.

 

 

 

By the way, you say that you get bored of the superficiality of bar-girl conversations but, if you think about it, then you'll conclude that most conversations don't excite. It's a very small minority of people that can entertain us. And however intelligent your wife is, after a while, you'll know everything she has to say on every matter without asking too.