Guest Posted November 2, 2002 Report Share Posted November 2, 2002 Says HIGH THAIED: Unless you are standing right there next to her, living with her, and she is accepting of the fact that you will take care of her, and her whole family, then, and only then, will she even concider being faithful to you. Yes yes yes! Could not have said it better myself. I think there's also more of an element of "taking care of one's own" here than we have. As in, these people take care of their own. It takes a *long* time for us not to be the outsider -- and until you're in her inner circle, even if you have what you consider to be all the trappings of being bf/gf or husband/wife whatever, there will be bullshit and lies and you will up against what I'll call "the thin brown line" (a reference to "the thin blue line" of corrupt NYC cops in a bygone era). It just doesn't occur to them that it should be any other way. And unless you are there with her full-time *in her environment* I think it's nearly impossible for you to get into the inner circle. Forget what you know about how this process works in the west, it's totally irrelevent here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jasmine Posted November 3, 2002 Report Share Posted November 3, 2002 Hi, [color:"red"] It can be the stupid BG giving all her money to a lazy thai BF, or Miss Thailand getting a 10 M $ sin sod, or simply the happy mother in a perfect relationship, still the male presence is paramount to their lives, [/color] It is defenitely the way a woman is brought up, most Thai women are brought up to respect males. Also, most women love their mothers for they know what thier mothers go through to be women of Thailand. There are a few women who was brought up to feel equal to men, I am one of them, my niece is now being brought up that way and so many of my Thai female freinds, however, we also know how to behave in some situations (hopefully). Many families think nothing of slapping around their women, my family had been harder on men, violence is not acceptable, especially from men. My father used to say that "if a man hits a woman, he is not luk-poo-chai (a man)", but a few of my females freinds were treated differently, however some will tell you that they are glad to be women for they are treated just fine. Being desirable is needed for many women for there may be little else (for some women) to make them feel good. Duties, I have to say that lots of Thais females feel that their duties are at home and their husbands. For me, my husband's happiness is very important and I will do many things to achieve it, but mine is more, what can I say? I do sound like a spoiled woman, blame it on my father and the rest of the men in my life!!! Cheers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jasmine Posted November 3, 2002 Report Share Posted November 3, 2002 [color:"red"] When i see my friends wives and how independant and free-thinking they have become, with their own jobs and new friends, and i think what their life would still be if they have stayed in LOS, I believe it was all gain for them. [/color] Agreed, and that is what so wonderful about the USA. I had a Thai physician girl freind who is still in Germany and she does fine. I have met more Thais who do well in the USA and it is questionable whether they could done as well if they stayed in Thailand. However, some intelligent and educated Thais could have done just as well in both countries. Cheers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jasmine Posted November 3, 2002 Report Share Posted November 3, 2002 [color:"red"] And unless you are there with her full-time *in her environment* I think it's nearly impossible for you to get into the inner circle. Forget what you know about how this process works in the west, it's totally irrelevent here. [/color] To get into inner circle takes more than being there full time in many Thai families. My family treat in-laws better than the kids because "The in-laws do not know the way we are in the family, besides, if ones treat in-laws well, they have more respect and will treat my children well.", my mother said. I think she is quite wise and the treatment works. Cheers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted November 4, 2002 Report Share Posted November 4, 2002 >>>Many families think nothing of slapping around their women, my family had been harder on men, violence is not acceptable, especially from men.<<< well, you know, some thai women are not too bad in slapping around the men as well, or grabbing knifes or whatever comes handy. actually, thinking about it, i can remember more guys who are beaten by their wifes here than the other way around... :: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jasmine Posted November 4, 2002 Report Share Posted November 4, 2002 Hi, [color:"red"] assume you mean fitting into the western community where they are relocated to, and are readily accepted within that community. [/color] Exactly. The "mia chou", for me is a paid woman who performs what is expected from a wife. There may be love involved. The fact that a lot of women felt insecure in their marriages, especially ones who are from close families and the west can be a lonesome place for many Thais. What I witnessed as problems in a non-BG women and Western men are different in many contexts. Most non-BG women I met have more education and most of them came from a so-called middle class. One common problem is both ex-BG and non-BG get lonesome easily. Being lonesome can lead into restlessness which can drive ones into not-so-good activities. I may open a new thread on problems I witness on the Thai women in the West. What I want to say though my friend is that, there is no guarantee in life, when you meet someone you feel good and happy with, you need to do your best to sustain the feelings, be what may. Cheers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jasmine Posted November 4, 2002 Report Share Posted November 4, 2002 Dear Fly, [color:"red"] some thai women are not too bad in slapping around the men as well, or grabbing knifes or whatever comes handy. [/color] Let me confess my thoughts on this type of behavior. I wonder that they can really act that way with their Thai males lovers/husbands. Perhaps they do behave that way with foreigners only?? Come to think about it, I saw some Thai soap operas on TV which people slap each other around, scream on top of their lungs, throwing things around, such behavior is not acceptable for me. What have you seen around where you live? Cheers! :: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted November 5, 2002 Report Share Posted November 5, 2002 >>>What have you seen around where you live?<<< more or less everything. i have to confess here that i have a few battlescars too... that particular time of the month women have..., here in thailand seems to leave them always rather volatile... :: fortunately nowadays my missus tells me when that time of the month has arrived again to better stay away from her... :: >>>Perhaps they do behave that way with foreigners only??<<< one of my missus brothers has a large fingernail scar in his face since a few months. couple of thai friends of mine are regularly bruised (some of them deserve it though...). in the soi i am living there is some kind of lower class area, and regular amusement is here when some wife is running after her husband with a large kitchen knife, lots of shouting, etc... thai women generally i see as very hot tempered, it has his drawbacks, but i must say, that i do prefer passionate people, otherwise my relationship would have ended a long time ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted November 5, 2002 Report Share Posted November 5, 2002 I agree ! The good Bg's love their sex !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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