I found a letter

[think_too_mut]

>where do i find the book? i didnt see any link to it

 

Three posts up, you have a clickable link supplied by Man at Work:

 

www.freelancerbar.com

 

If you still can't find it, I can email it to you, it's only 456Kb.

 

[Guest]

thank you but i did find it , was reading other stuff and didnt see the link

[jasmine]

Hello,

 

I hope you found the "Private Dancing" as an eye opener. I am a woman and Thai and I still cannot understand the behavior of these BG.

 

Perhaps, this is the first dissapointment/heartfreak in a relationship, but what you are doing is beating yourself up. The next woman may make you feel better, however, from my experience, healing has to come form yourself. By the way, is she worth you agonizing over and for how long?

 

Did not mean to sound unkind, but healing needs to start, good luck.

 

Cheers :(

[pattaya127]

I doubt this read will help you, as the Private Dancer story is nothing thai really, but could happen anywhere around the world. the truth is that many times, many guys should read warning signs about their relationship being not so what they think it is, but wish to ignore or rationalize them, while at the very same time telling someone else to read the Private Dancer story.

[Guest]

>>I hope you found the "Private Dancing" as an eye opener.<<

 

i hope that you don't trust too much into that "private dancer book". very good in the characterisation of farangs who hang around too much in the bars and don't know anything else in thailand - completely off when it comes down to the characterisation of the thais, esp. male thais. that book IMHO needs some serious rewriting.

[Guest]

well i read the private dancer book right now. but i am not using it as a guideline on how things are. i guess the only way to know is to be more observant on what going on and try not to be blindfolded when you are in love. but that easier said then done i guess. what can i say when i find a diary from my ex GF she has been writing when i was away from home and she writes that she loves me and stuff and that finally she find the man (meaning me by name and all) she wants and to be with? i did find this by pure coincidence and i dont think she left it there in purpose, to know more just gets me confused. i can only know the truth of what happened to me until i have some more time between me and what has happened and i can confront her with a cold heart and not the feelings i have right now. sometimes men do stupid things i guess and i know in my position no matter what people will tell me or say i will swallow anything she has to feed me..... so i hope she not call me to soon and waits at least a few more months. also i am sure our paths will cross sooner or later down in Thailand.....

that day that sorrow i guess but until then i will try to mend myself and see this whole affair as a experience and be more careful in the future.

i am still to chocked about all this and thought passing trough my mind is that maybe the girl that talked with her mother just bullshitted me maybe i try call again and have a friend from here that speaks thai call her mother again and see. the mind can play you hard tricks sometime.

i guess the hope is the last things that leaves you, i am just sitting here and waiting to hear a good excuse. i never had her to be a bargirl adn i belive it with all of my heart and even all of her friends insist on it still and they do work the bars as bargirls but still claims she was just working as a cashier and had been there less then 3 weeks when she met me. i have seen to many of them she was fresh out of the game but still i am no expert on the field. i sat in that bar for many days even before speaking with her adn i didnt barfine any other girls just went home sleeping alone after we had been out drinking and dancing. she was what she told me she was there and it was mere circumstances i went out with her. if she wanted money why did she never ask for it or told me to buy or give her anything? she never wanted to hang at bars or discos almost reluctant to the idea. i dont know what to think and, the more i think the worse i feel i am trying to change and get over it but deep down somewhere there is this feeling and maybe a last grasp of hope that i try to find. i want all the stories i have heard to be a lie and that they just bullshitting me for some reason i dont know , only thing i know is that i would be alot happer to find out that she is in taiwan working or something like that..

i know it dont make sense but this is what i feel today

 

by the way i find the book Private Dancer to be good reading.

 

 

 

[jasmine]

Hi,

 

I don't believe everything I hear or read Fly. Wasn't there an incident of an American who ran away from his murder wife not long ago?

 

What I found in the book is a possibilities of a relationship, also, many ex-BG I met (not all), think similar to the "Joy" woman in the subjects of money, Thai boyfreinds/husbands, gambling and not much respect for their "farangs" husbands. You have to hear what they called their husbands!

 

I feel that the book is an eye-opener for the person who knows little about Thais in their corners of night life (that includes me), but each case is different, and hopefully we should know better.

 

I have helped many of these ex-BG and I have been burned but still, when asked for help, I have never turned any of them down completely, but (before reading the book) I listen with only one ear, now I do a little research before helping.

 

Cheers!

[Guest]

see, the only way to find out the truth (if there is one), you might have to take a flight to thailand, and go to her village, speak with her family.

who knows, maybe that person you spoke with told you bullshit, maybe not, but if you can't get over it, than you should try to find out. if you can't go yourself now, you should maybe consider trying out a detective service. stickman does that occasionally i think, and as far as i know his rates are very reasonable.

 

problem with private dancer is that thais are not as desribed in the book. after finishing that book you very possibly come away with the impression that the majority of thais are sceming brutes without conscience, which is total bullshit.

[check_bin_krap]

Akarr, I know I am repeating myself. Avoid confronting her. Just get over with this, and get on with life. Whatever reason she had for leaving you is irrelevant!

 

If you think your "paths cross in Thailand again", make sure they don't. Don't go to whereever she comes from.

 

Life is too short to brood over failures, you will regret every moment you spend on this bitch from now on!

 

Cheers and good luck.

[Guest]

>>>I feel that the book is an eye-opener who knows little about Thais in their corners of night life <<<

 

problem is, that the writer maybe knows something on being a farang in the nightlife, but nothing about the thais in the nightlife.

just recently for example a friend of mine, a westerner with a heroin problem, was taken in by a heroin addicted hooker. my friend slept a week on the street as he has spent all his money (or better, it was spent for him...). that girl gave him food, supported him with the poison, let him sleep in her room, and so helped him back to his homecountry (where he kicked the habit now). she did not do that for any other reward than helping a guy out of luck.

she still peddles her arse every night on sukhumvit, trying to make ends meet.

 

if you want, i can show you reality one day, not fiction.