The_Munchmaster Posted March 21, 2008 Report Share Posted March 21, 2008 A hillbilly farmer who wanted to get a divorce paid a visit to a lawyer. The lawyer said, 'How can I help you?' The farmer said, 'I want to get one of them dayvorces.' The lawyer said, 'Do you have any grounds?' The farmer said, 'Yes, I got 40 acres'. The lawyer said, 'No, No, you don't understand, Do you have a suit? The farmer said, 'Yes, I got a suit, I wears it to church on Sundays.' The lawyer said, 'No, no, I mean, do you have a case?' The farmer said, 'No, I ain't got a Case, but I got a John Deere. The lawyer said, 'No, I mean, do you have a grudge?' The farmer said,â?? Yes, I got a grudge, that's where I parks the John Deere' The lawyer said, 'Does your wife beat you up or something?' The farmer said, 'No, we both get up at 4:30..' By now the lawyer is getting frustrated but tries one last question. The lawyer said, 'Is your wife a nagger?' The farmer said, 'No, she's a little white gal, but our last child was a nagger and that's why I wants a dayvorce..' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flashermac Posted March 22, 2008 Report Share Posted March 22, 2008 Dick Cheney and George W. Bush stopped for breakfast at Denny's. A cute young waitress came to their table and asked them what they'd like. Cheney thought a bit and then replied. "I'd like a bowl of oatmeal and some fruit." "What can I get for you, Mr. President?" the waitress asked with a pleasant smile. George looked up from his menu and replied with his trademark grin, "How about a quickie this morning?" "Mr. President!" the waitress exclaimed with shock. "You're starting to behave just like President Clinton." And she stormed away in a huff. Dick Cheney leaned over and whispered to George. "It's pronounced 'quiche'." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CTO Posted March 22, 2008 Report Share Posted March 22, 2008 love em all Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Torneyboy Posted March 22, 2008 Report Share Posted March 22, 2008 Not funny..imo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Munchmaster Posted March 22, 2008 Report Share Posted March 22, 2008 All 5 of them or just the one about the Kiwi and the Aussie? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
candyfloss Posted March 23, 2008 Report Share Posted March 23, 2008 I thought the one about the Hillbilly Farmer was a little bit racist, and I don't think there is any place for that sort of humour on this Board, especially after having watched Mississipi Burning last night. Having said that, I thought it was funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Man at Work Posted March 25, 2008 Report Share Posted March 25, 2008 Man were do you get all those'? They were excellent! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Torneyboy Posted March 25, 2008 Report Share Posted March 25, 2008 All 5 of them or just the one about the Kiwi and the Aussie? Yes..the others were your usual high standard.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Munchmaster Posted March 25, 2008 Report Share Posted March 25, 2008 I'm sorry, but I cannot reveal my sources. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CTO Posted March 26, 2008 Report Share Posted March 26, 2008 Hu's on China Great parody of the Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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