Jump to content

Any New Jokes


Recommended Posts

A hillbilly farmer who wanted to get a divorce paid a visit to a lawyer.


The lawyer said, 'How can I help you?'


The farmer said, 'I want to get one of them dayvorces.'


The lawyer said, 'Do you have any grounds?'


The farmer said, 'Yes, I got 40 acres'.


The lawyer said, 'No, No, you don't understand, Do you have a suit?


The farmer said, 'Yes, I got a suit, I wears it to church on Sundays.'


The lawyer said, 'No, no, I mean, do you have a case?'


The farmer said, 'No, I ain't got a Case, but I got a John Deere.


The lawyer said, 'No, I mean, do you have a grudge?'


The farmer said,â?? Yes, I got a grudge, that's where I parks the John Deere'


The lawyer said, 'Does your wife beat you up or something?'


The farmer said, 'No, we both get up at 4:30..'


By now the lawyer is getting frustrated but tries one last question.


The lawyer said, 'Is your wife a nagger?'


The farmer said, 'No, she's a little white gal, but our last child was a nagger and that's why I wants a dayvorce..'

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dick Cheney and George W. Bush stopped for breakfast at Denny's.


A cute young waitress came to their table and asked them what they'd like.


Cheney thought a bit and then replied. "I'd like a bowl of oatmeal and some fruit."


"What can I get for you, Mr. President?" the waitress asked with a pleasant smile.


George looked up from his menu and replied with his trademark grin, "How about a quickie this morning?"


"Mr. President!" the waitress exclaimed with shock. "You're starting to behave just like President Clinton." And she stormed away in a huff.


Dick Cheney leaned over and whispered to George.


"It's pronounced 'quiche'."






Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Create New...