The Western Men, are they kind or gullible?

[gobbledonk]

Wody,

 

 

 

I salute you on getting to Thailand on US9,000 pa - wow. Some guys would spend that much during a single holiday, if you included airfares etc, and not think twice. You must be one frugal dude.

 

 

 

Getting back to Jasmine's post - are Westerners 'kinder' ? I've noticed a definite hardening of attitudes towards the 'havenots' here in Oz, in direct correlation to the number of BMW's and Porsches which line our leafy streets. I suspect that Thailand suffers from the same malady, and I'm afraid that it will get worse

 

 

 

 

 

 

[jingjoh]

Dude, every year I come back and see things a little worse, a little harder, and alot more agro around. In melbourne people are being taxed to the shithouse, the Brax government is fucking us over big time, these new laws for motorcyclists and all these new speed camera initiatives are a joke and fly in the face of the hard statistics they have. I was sitting at the lights tonight, and this intersection has one of those new red light/speed cameras we have been so lucky to get and the thing was flashing every 5 seconds!! 5klms over the limit u get flashed, its totally fuked. Its damn hard for people to live here in Victoria now, and the stress and rage is building up exponentially.

 

 

 

Sorry for going off topic here, jasmines post was excellent, whether gullible, stupid or just kind, Western men do make alot of difference to many Thai women.

[BkkShaggy]

Me too would like to vote your post for the Post of the Year Award.

 

 

 

Thank you very much for sharing your personal experience with us.

 

 

 

 

 

"To be fair, I need to mention help from some Thais. Most of our relatives and so-called friends just ignored us at best. Some completely stayed away from us, my own uncle for example, for fear of we borrowing money. "

 

 

 

 

 

I think one of the reasons Westerners are more willing to help out is that they are protected by their social security scheme in their home country. So, how poor or rich they are, they are less reluctant to help out those poorer Thai girls knowing when they get old or in financial difficulties there are governments there to help them in one way or the another. Where as when you were young the social security program was non-existance in Thailand , even now it has a long way to go to fully function. I guess my point is your relatives or friends who didn't help your family might think of their own family long tern financial needs first? I don't know them but may be they have many children to support? You are the one who knows the answer. Just a thought.

 

 

 

 

 

"But one of my father?s distant cousins who has been married to a Chinese businessman came to help. Because of the ?face? concept, her husband borrowed my mother Baht 10,000 (my mother sold some gold) and paid 10% per month, we all knew that he didn?t need that money. He kept paying the 10% per month, which was Baht 1,000 for 6 years; we had to tell him that we didn?t want the money any more. "

 

 

 

That 'face' concept thing stil puzzles me ! Why didn't your relatives lose face when they didn't help you? I think they should have losed face forever !

 

 

 

 

 

From your story you got a lot of help from your school friends. I was wondering why you have concluded that Westerners are more of a 'giver' than Thais and questioned whether they are kind or gullible.

 

 

 

Well, to restate my answer let me say, because we can afford it. And it makes us feel good about ourselves.

[bibblies]

"Note from moderator: Anyone even thinks about flaming this girl in this thread will be dead-meat-on-a-stick."

 

 

 

Eh? Why would one flame her? Though she could stick a few paragraphs in there, just to break it up a bit.. And what other kind of meat could one find on a stick?

 

 

 

For a lot of Westerners, it's their first trip to a nation that, although it isn't that poor by world standards, is much poorer than theirs in terms of opportunities.

 

 

 

I for one had taken for granted my free, untroubled access to education and healthcare, leading to an assumed rosy career and comfortable lifestyle. This made me feel a little ashamed when I saw the stark reality that some people's futures are in fact severely limited. This made me kinder (and it's made me less tolerant of whingeing people in the UK).

 

 

 

Apart from that, is it Christian culture versus Buddhist? Don't know enough to judge. The difference between kindness and gullibility surely depends only on the recipient of the kind act though.

[check_bin_krap]

Is the gullible farang who gives a lot of money to his Thai girl doing this merely out of kindness? Its time to take a reality check here and stop praising ourself fellow farangs!

 

 

 

Kindness is doing something without asking anything back. Like helping kids without parents. Giving money to a good cause. Doing something for drug addicts. Or for that matter, giving money to someone unconditionally. Those farangs who do this deserve praise.

 

 

 

I would like to add that I have also been sending money to a Thai GF before, and I sure did not do this out of kindness.

 

 

 

There is no reason to think we are better than Thai just because we give a pretty girlfriend money!

 

 

 

Cheers!

[Zaad]

"The Western Men, are they kind or gullible?"

 

 

 

I can't give you an answer to this question, because of the simple fact that Western men aren't all the same. Many Thai people, including my wife, her family and friends think (thought) all farang are alike. But there are many differences between them. Some farang are kind and some aren't, some farang are gullible and some aren't.

 

So the term "Western men" isn't appropriate to use, because they differ a lot from eachother.

 

I'm Portuguese but I grew up in Holland. I know the Portuguese lifestyle, people, traditions, etc as well as the Dutch. And the French also, because I have much family living there.

 

The big difference is North/West Europe (Holland, England, Germany...) and South/East Europe (Portugal, Spain, Italy...). N/W Europe is rich and is more comparable with the American lifestyle.

 

S/E Europe is considered "poor" and is more comparable with South American and Asian lifestyle.

 

I think it's not relevant now to discuss those differences by detail.

 

But if you talk about financial matters, like you mentioned in your story, I think it really differs for each individual from every origin.

 

That's what I've experienced in both North/South Europe and Thailand. And also what you've experienced as I read in your story.

 

 

 

 

[Guest lazyphil]

The big difference is North/West Europe (Holland, England, Germany...) and South/East Europe (Portugal, Spain, Italy...). N/W Europe is rich and is more comparable with the American lifestyle

 

 

 

When English gasoline prices are that of the good old US of A and I can then go out and acquire my dream gas guzzling Camaro 68'. Then you can come back and tell me this

 

 

[Zaad]

We are talking about people and their lifestyle (+status).

 

NOT what their country has to offer them.

 

I suggest you immigrate to USA to fullfil your dream.

[Guest lazyphil]

It was a JOKE

[jasmine]

"there is a vast difference between thai and western middle class."

 

 

 

I don't think we should compare the Thai and western middle class, they are a lot of differences. Should ones expect to see other cultures in the same lights as what we are used to at home?

 

 

 

?we are touched by poverty when we see the hardship in person. Most thais have seen it from their early childhood, so they are probably not overwhelmed by it.

 

 

 

I think you are right, what we see everyday can make us insensitive.

 

 

 

Thanks, SOONGMAK for your viewpoints and kind words.

 

 

 

Cheers!