The Western Men, are they kind or gullible?

[jasmine]

"I did find it interesting that your larger Thai family did not help out to a large degree, when it's said many times here that Thai's care about little else than "The Family" (an exaggeration, I know). And yet, it does seem as though you had many Thai friends (and teacher) who helped you out, finding a way of getting around the 'face issue'. Do you think the help was not as great as might it might have been, because those wanting to help, simply did not have anything to give (as in being poor)? Or did they not help as much as they might have, because of 'face issue', or are other posters mostly wrong to say that Thai's, in general, are "family first", and everything else is secondary?"

 

 

 

It was sorted out why no "family" did not help. First, my parents families were small and the one (uncle) who was a college educated man who financially could did not agree that a I a female, needed more education.

 

 

 

My freinds in school who helped were close friends, however, there were more classmates (than the 4 who helped), who made fun of me for accepting help but my homeroom teacher and the principal put a stop to it.

 

 

 

I feel that the adversity has made me what I am today I hope to be kinder to all walks of life without preconceived ideas.

 

 

 

"Thank you, maak maak,"

 

Yindee Kha.

 

 

 

Thanks and Cheers!

 

 

 

 

[jasmine]

"Though she could stick a few paragraphs in there, just to break it up a bit.."

 

I agree, will keep that in mind next time.

 

 

 

"And what other kind of meat could one find on a stick? "

 

I saw a "still wiggling lizard" on a stick over an open fire once in Loei, Thailand. Could not eat supper that day.

 

 

 

Cheers!

 

 

[jasmine]

"I think one of the reasons Westerners are more willing to help out is that they are protected by their social security scheme in their home country."

 

 

 

I agree for some extent. In the USA now, it is more obvious that ones cannot live on the Social Security alone when ones retire. My husband who is a retired Air Force and is making in the 6 figures now, will receive $1,200/mo when he turns 62. It will be impossible to feed and cloth, provide medication/insurance on the $1,200/mo.

 

 

 

Cheers!

[jasmine]

"So the term "Western men" isn't appropriate to use, because they differ a lot from eachother. "

 

 

 

I really did not what term I should have used. I meant the ones who go to Thailand and have contacts with the Thais, what term, do you suggest I use?

 

 

 

Cheers!

[jasmine]

"But what i can say is that thru my life, i have always seen the most humble (poor and not rich) people to be the kindest."

 

 

 

I received that kindness in Nepal who really had not much. I have not experienced it in Thailand (could be I am hardly there, or in the wrong places) but I heard about it. It does warm my heart to know that.

 

 

 

Cheers!

[jasmine]

"Would you mind sharing how your mom is today, and what her situation is? She sounds like a great woman, which is shown by both her actions to support you, and your love for her. Could not have been easy for her with your father passing away, and two kids to raise."

 

 

 

Thanks for asking about my mother; I called her "mae". She is in her mid seventies now, she has lots of problem with the knees, the doctors said they were damaged badly during her banana farm days and cannot be repaired.

 

 

 

She is very proud of me and my brother (a lawyer) and happy. What she has done for her children was exceptional for there were samples of my father colleagues who died young and the children suffered terribly. I go to Thailand every 12-16 months for the past 6 years because of her health.

 

 

 

Cheers!

 

 

 

 

[jasmine]

In reply to:

---

That 'face' concept thing stil puzzles me ! Why didn't your relatives lose face when they didn't help you? I think they should have losed face forever !

 

---

 

 

 

I have a hard time expalining the "face" concept. We did not have many relatives, perhaps they did not have "face" to lose!! We hold no grudges though.

 

 

 

Smile!!

 

or

 

 

 

Cheers!

[Guest]

Hi Jasmine,

 

 

 

Good of you to come back so quick, and answer all replys.

 

 

 

>>>Thanks for asking about my mother; I called her "mae".<<<

 

 

 

What does "Mae" mean in Thai?

 

 

 

>>>>She is in her mid seventies now, she has lots of problem with the knees, the doctors said they were damaged badly during her banana farm days and cannot be repaired.<<<

 

 

 

Can she get around on her own, or is it a pretty bad situation, if you don't mind me asking? You did say she was happy, so I imagine it is not that bad, as if she were commited to a wheelchair, or in a lot of pain.

 

 

 

>>>>She is very proud of me and my brother (a lawyer) and happy. What she has done for her children was exceptional for there were samples of my father colleagues who died young and the children suffered terribly. I go to Thailand every 12-16 months for the past 6 years because of her health.<<<<

 

 

 

I bet she is proud!!!. What an accomplishment for her, as a single mom faced with what got thrown at her, and getting to see her two children prosper, and both leading meaningful lives....Is your brother a lawyer in Thailand? And does your husband travel back to LOS with you, every year? And if so, what is his take on Thailand, in general?

 

 

 

Sorry, but my "inquiring mind" wants to know.

 

 

 

HT

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Zaad]

Oh a joke, I didn't realize that could be an option.

 

I was very focussed on Jasmine's story and my reply to her.

 

 

[Guest]

Hi again Jasmine,

 

 

 

>>>>My freinds in school who helped were close friends, however, there were more classmates (than the 4 who helped), who made fun of me for accepting help but my homeroom teacher and the principal put a stop to it.<<<<

 

 

 

This part really fasinates me, as it says volumes about the true way of your life, brought up in Thailand. It is great that that your homeroom teacher, and principal, took action against other students for making fun of you. They sound like good people because of that, and shows that it is not acceptable to do so, in the Thai culture. But what made the greater majority decide to do so? A Thai "face isssue", do you think, or just kids being cruel, the same as anywhere else?

 

 

 

You have lived outside of LOS long enough to probably be able to look back on the situation, and see it for what it really was. That is why I am asking.....

 

 

 

You are unique to this board, Jasmine.........in that you have seen/lived both sides since birth. I know of less than 1 % here that can say so. I thank you again for your precious participation.

 

 

 

HT