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BG Disaster - my turn


think_too_mut

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>If you can genuinely feel remorse from her, I concur with the advice being given here.

 

TedBKK,

It's muchly appreciated what you are saying. My (not only)trouble is that I am still fresh out of the shit.

 

Aha, her latest SMS is just in: "I want you forgive me one more time".

I should go to the top of the thread and reread what my pain is.

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[color:"blue"]I have is that I spent 7 months with her out of 11. We are perfectly happy when together, but TTM story scares me.[/color]

 

Even spending every single second with one would be little comfort and offer scant guarantee if she were a crafty one. For example heaven help you if she speaks a language other than Thai with her family; she'll forever be able to use that to her (and their) advantage, right under your nose. No one will help *you* in such cases, either, believe me.

 

I am of the opinion that even in the absolutely BEST possible scenarios that get discussed on this board, there is ALWAYS going to be *something* going on that the farang wouldn't like if he discovered it. I'm talking, 100% of the time. Period, end of story. People truly underestimate how different our values are from theirs. We just come at life from diametrically different angles from them.

 

That doesn't mean there isn't common ground, or that relationships can't be successful and even on your own terms (my marriage finally is, but only after some fucking serious turbulence that is generally cause for breaking up LONG before it gets to the levels I put up with and which t_t_m is dealing with now). But you have to be prepared for the very most serious crap you could ever imagine, and then look witihn yourself, and decide what you want out of it.

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There's admittedly very little information here for me to draw conclusions, but I will mention something anyway: watch her phrasing very carefully! You will want to try to determine whether she's gone into a sort of self-preservation mode, where retaining you is still part of the scheme/scam; or whether she's gone into a mode where she's genuinely afraid of losing you for more noble reasons.

 

Remember, after what's gone down, she's really not in any position to express her wants to you. Having been caught red-handed systematically hosing you down, what *she wants* should be near the bottom of the list! Let it be about what *you* want, about how *you* feel, for a while!

 

Remember: If she's worth it, she'll still be around even after you have held her feet over the fire for a while over this.

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Seriously, I could write a book about all the shit I've been through here (actually, I pretty much did that. See "My Story" parts 1 - 30 (!) in trip reports/stories on this board).

 

Anyway, I'm happy if my insights can help you in some way. Hang in there brother! You're not alone!

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I was keeping out of this one. I feel I'm one of the lucky ones, he says hopefully, but I feel this guys pain and have offered my silent prayer.

 

Gotta agree with Ted on this though TTM, you do need to dangle her feet over the fire a little and make sure you hear what you need to hear.

 

You also need to be here soon to get it really straight, and do the kiss and make up stuff, also v-important if you're gonna get this thing back on track I think.

 

Don't keep us waiting too long.

 

M.

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>watch her phrasing very carefully! You will want to try to determine whether she's gone into a sort of self-preservation mode, where retaining you is still part of the scheme/scam;

 

She's not leaving me alone. Two emails just arrived (she's equiped to do that from her (my) home):

 

 

................................................................................

What can i do for your for give me again.I don't know what I want to do now.If you don't stop love me.

I want you come to love me again.I want to express my sorrow at hurting you.

...............................................................................

 

(Shit, for all this time she should have learned English better)

 

 

You are right, it's time to give her a bit of a stick.

 

Hey, for similar offences, Thais kill or attempt to kill each other. No forgivenes and "pls come and love me again". Maybe, with 1 inch dick afterwards.

 

 

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Don't let your wife know this !

 

How we hate " I told you so" from those bitch

 

Hang in there, bro.

 

Maybe after all it's all worth it.

 

Just couldn't get it why she had to sleep around again for money. I believe what you gave her was more than enough.

 

Just don't get these bitches.

 

 

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