How much do they really like us?

[khunsanuk]

Hi,

"In general do you prefer the appearance of Thai or Asian men over westerners?"

In talking to my wife's friends I would say that most of them prefer Thai men. Non-Thai Asians will do otherwise.

I think that just like we are a small minority for liking Asian/Thai women, so Thai women liking Western men are a small minority.

Sanuk!

[Guest]

quote:

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Originally posted by sayjann:

she will not take money from me for any reason,even though i put it in her purse some days and always pay her rent for a few months when i leave.

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need i say more?

denial is not a river in egypt.

[Guest]

Rule #1. bargirls always tell the truth. Except under the following circumstances:

A. When taking to a Farang Male.

B. When they can smell a purple

C. When they are awake

D. all of the above

[bibblies]

quote:

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Originally posted by bkk_nsr:

denial is not a river in egypt.

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LOL I'd never heard that one before.

Also, "i always pay her bar-fine everyday so that she can stop working and go home or out with her friends"..

If the girl likes you so much, why doesn't she stop working while you are here and thus save you 500 Baht a day?

[pattaya127]

2 points:

when you are talking about BGs, you talk about mostly very young women, who can be part streetwise and part young puppy. i never cease to hear about girls who go with a guy, though he's kee niao (cheap), and can't get enough of him, as well as crying because he is a big butterfly, but then back to him, all while scoring their paycheck with other guys.

Also, depends what you mean by "like". You are not talking about deeply reflective types of people or situations. Sure, they like a guy easily, if he is nice. In a shallow manner. I don't believe either that they have any resentment against guys for selling their company for a living, but most likely, after a few heartbreaks, they will start looking at men as possibly being just that:...Men! Not out of judging us, but simply by experience and weariness. IMO

[shygye]

Do you really like me? Or only when I buy a round of drinks.

[sayjann]

sanukdee:-

she has not got me trained as you think,yes i give her money,but this is for my own piece of mind,these girls are providing a service and expect payment and i could not go with a girl and not pay her.

when i offer my girl money in the morning then she always refuses,so i put it in her wallet and more than once she has found it and given it back to me and sometimes i have taken it back,sometimes not.

three times i refused to take it back and she got angry and threw the money in my face,saying "why you not understand,i not want your money,i just want to stay with you"

of course other times she has kept the money but never mentioned it,maybe she thinks talking of money is a taboo subject.

in my visits to LOS i have taken her home 22 nights(including bangkok and her village to visit her father and son) and she has only accepted 8000 baht,which is nothing really.

yes i pay her rent and food,but she has never asked for a present and when we have been out i've asked her if she wants something and she always says no.

the only thing she accepted from me is 1 t-shirt and she has bought me 9 cd's,t-shirts,a suitcase and often pays for the meal and drinks on a night out.

bibblies:-yes i pay her bar fine,i know that all thai girls tell you "i not like dancing,i not like work in go-go,i want to go home,you pay for me to stop working?"

when i pay the bar fine then she gets 100-150 baht as her share.

how much is she losing in money by letting me bar-fine her every night?

i am a butterfly and she does not like it but puts up with me.

when i pay bar for her then often she goes home and i go with another lady and she knows this.

if i do not want to see her that night i always tell her that i will not take her home and she knows i am butterflying.

sometimes a bit of a problem!!!.

if she did not want me to pay for her to stop working knowing full well that i would not take her home why would she she stop working?,there is nothing stopping her saying no to me and telling me she wants to work and harass men for lady drinks and maybe go with other men and earn money

[Guest]

Originally posted by Khun Sanuk:

I think that just like we are a small minority for liking Asian/Thai women, so Thai women liking Western men are a small minority.

It may be bad for us (more competition), but it is not true anymore that Americans who like asian women are a minority. The vast majority of men under 40 think the asian look (for women) is very hot.

I also disagree that the average Thai woman (or man) doesn't like the Western look. The popularity of luk-krung singers and actors should be some indication of this and as most of you know, Thais typically prefer lighter skin. The popularity of various cosmetic surgeries is also a testament to Thai people wanting to look more western.

I've often heard Thai bargirls saying that they think farang are better looking that Thai and that luk-krung children are the cutest. Yes, 99% of that is just what the customer wants to hear, but that doesn't make it untrue

One thing to consider is that the average American visiting the bars does not compare well with the average American, IMO (I can't say anything about other farang). So bargirls may get a skewed impression and we almost certainly couldn't compare (on the average) with a bargirl's poor boyfriends, e.g. the boy she gave her virginity to and who since then has broken her heart. But that has nothing to do with race, strippers here have better looking BFs than their customers (of course, they're usually loser musicians who leech all the girls money).

However, I think the average farang stacks up pretty well against the rich Thai/Chinese. My personal opinion is that good-looking Thai men tend to be lazy, because they can easily find a good girl to take advantage of (not a rule, just an observation).

[Guest]

It is a common misconception that you can tell how much a bargirl loves you by how much money she accepts or demands. E.g. it has been suggested that you test her by not paying her and seeing if she still will hang out (or sleep) with you. This is almost as absurd as going out on dates with a farang girl and insisting on splitting the bill down the middle.

Relationships with bargirls are much more complicated and ALWAYS concern money or financial security in some way. I admit there may be some cases where a bargirl thinks a guy is so hot and fun that she'll sleep with him without payment (and expect no long term relationship). This is very rare and never about love.

If you are farang and don't offer to pay a girls barfine (and pay her for her time) she will almost certainly think less of you, unless you can somehow convince her you find it morally wrong and NEVER do it. You are clearly jai dam if you are that cheap and a girl would be truly foolish to expect a romantic relationship with you (not that you can't find foolish girls out there).

Bargirls may sometimes accept less money (or even refuse it) if they think there is a future in the relationship. This most likely isn't love, but at least it shows they are open to the possibility of a real long-term relationship.

[Guest]

sayjann, it sounds like you're doing all the right things by not leading her on and being completely honest about your butterflying. She clearly is looking for a long term commitment, but it's her informed choice if she wants to wait around for you to give it. By not accepting money directly she can always convince herself that she is not a prostitute (at least not with you). Try to find ways of compensating her that let her keep her pride.

I agree she sounds like a "good one" (relatively speaking, of course). Keep being good to her, so she stays that way.