Guest Posted April 18, 2003 Report Share Posted April 18, 2003 Well my list was not all inclusive and sort of made up at the whim of the moment but these things as far as Thai women are concerned are the things that I would seek out in a long term mate. On my last trip I was in town for awhile and the girl I was with the majority of the time definitely passed all 6. That is why I pretty much had a girlfriend for one month. Well let's take inventory: 1) Has manners and respects her self as well as me Would you rather she be disrespectful or come off like she does not appreciate you holding doors buying a flower etc.? 2) Sticks up for me or is helpful when being price gouged Would you rather her stand by with her arms folded when the Baht Bus guy tries to over charge you? 3) HONESTY!!! I think this one goes without saying I am sure it is on your list too! 4) Does not make a scene when she cannot have her way This is negotiable but that shows maturity to me. She accepts that things don't always go her way and maybe next time they will. 5) Does not refer to me as "farang" (I HATE this) For me this can never happen, that shows me disrespect. I don't refer to her as "Thaigirl", I have a NAME! 6) Is open minded This is negotiable also but besides number 4 and number 6 I think the list is not only valid but if these are violated shows a lot about what she thinks about you! Oh, one more, she pays for some things and buys you things without you asking! That shows so much on her part (IMO) Now Check this is not an all inclusive list and everyone does not have to judge their woman based on this but I think you should expect certain things from your woman whether you agree with a list or not. :DRemember, she expects certain things from you too! The funny thing about this thread is it made me come to grips with what a really great girl I had there! DAMN I WANNA GO BACK! Oneye Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cardinalblue Posted April 19, 2003 Report Share Posted April 19, 2003 Check, you say you agree with what jasmine says that it is like an interview but then you follow it up in your very next sentence that romance shouldn't be treated like an interview. Somewhat confusing on where you really stand on it. It sounds like you disagree with jasmine's statement tha you agree with it? I think jasmine is correct. It is exactly like an interview and we do a horrible job at it because of "love" feelings. Does not love make us think irrational? Is one clear-minded when making an important decision to spend the rest of their lives with someone? Maybe it's beneficial to get a second and third opinion from people who can see things a little more objectively at that point? Don't we do that often in the interview process and God knows that is far from the perfect system. Guys here don't give it enough time in getting to really know the girl before declaring rather quickly "I am in love". I will surmise to you that the guy is not in love with the girl but really in love with the attention they are getting/receiving and times she can provide to him. And who knows if those are sincere and real given sometimes the motives involved? When two distinct cultures are involved as we have here, it should more then ever be like an exhaustive interview and a lot more time in getting to know more about her than people from similar and compatible backgrounds..... Food for thought.... Cardinalblue Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
check_bin_krap Posted April 19, 2003 Report Share Posted April 19, 2003 "you say you agree with what jasmine says that it is like an interview but then you follow it up in your very next sentence that romance shouldn't be treated like an interview. Somewhat confusing on where you really stand on it. It sounds like you disagree with jasmine's statement tha you agree with it?" ...................................................................... I would say that after meeting a potential partner one over time will find out if one fits together or not, and that has to do with personality and character. But I would NEVER drag along a list and think if this person fits this or that? Thats what you do in an interview, not in romance. And you know, one is often wrong if you go by the book in this stuff. You have to live it out and find out. You had a very good point for my case when you came up with your job example. You can't find your career simply based on sense and grades. You have to consider what you like to do, what you enjoy. Its the same in romantic affairs, love comes first and is essential. I would say the most important is that both persons love eachother and from that can work things out. If thats not there, the rest is useless. If its there - faults and other stuff can be tolerated. Cheers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
check_bin_krap Posted April 19, 2003 Report Share Posted April 19, 2003 Yeah oneyejacks, it might be useful to tick off a list if one picks up a BG. In relations outside the scene, it sure won't even get into considering a relationship if the girl is not honest or calls you farang etc. And there mutual love would be most important don't you agree? Cheers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 19, 2003 Report Share Posted April 19, 2003 >>>or calls you farang etc. <<< i don't know what the problem with being called 'farang' is. the question is more how one calls you 'farang'. but i do agree with your posts here, this checklist kind of looking for a wife/girlfriend is a bit strange, but there really are guys around here who go around like that. i guess that is why they can't get someone at home (and they will have difficulties here with women as well when they come up with that shopping for a wife attitude). thing is that in a relationship you grow together over the years, and both have to work on that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JJsushi Posted April 19, 2003 Report Share Posted April 19, 2003 Says jasmine: [color:"red"] This is not like making up a list for interviewing a candidate for a job... [/color] Realistically, we do the interviews for our mates in every sense of the way, dating and all, just to get to know him/her and we do hope that we fall in love with the ones who are good for us, don't you think? I just know now that if I were single again, I have lost that interview skill Too bad not all of us are easy to get to know and the thing called "love" does not always happen with the right person. Cheers! I don't think that is always the case unless you are actively searching for a mate. I can think of countless personal romances for me that started off as acquaintances that evolved into friendships at some point romance and then the thoughts of potential permanency entered the picture. Formal dating never entered the picture nor did the "interviewing" process. Sometimes I never even realized I had a romantic interest in the person until after several months of being in contact with them in some capacity (i.e. work environment). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
check_bin_krap Posted April 19, 2003 Report Share Posted April 19, 2003 "I don't think that is always the case unless you are actively searching for a mate. I can think of countless personal romances for me that started off as acquaintances that evolved into friendships at some point romance and then the thoughts of potential permanency entered the picture. " ................................................................. A very good point indeed, and its the same with me also. Cheers! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
steffi Posted April 20, 2003 Report Share Posted April 20, 2003 I would still like to see a distinction made b/w somebody who has had any history in the nightlife industry and somebody who was a virgin when they married. I don't wish to offend anybody but it's my thinking that the latter is of better character than the former. I will accept like many other people that there are a lot of women in that industry because they have to be and not because they want to be. It should be truely said that those who want to be are not to be considered GTGs. (Define "want" as those who choose to stay in that industry when they are offered an opportunity out of it) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cardinalblue Posted April 20, 2003 Report Share Posted April 20, 2003 Steffi, The only problem i have with your post is that you mention that the girls "have to be here". Unless sold by their family, each girl chooses to work or not work in the night scene. She doesn't have to be here; she has chosen to work for the economic benefit or she has the option of not choosing to work this business. Many girls like the rest of the 95% of her socio-econ class choose NOT to work the sex scene. What makes one choose to work vs not choosing to work when facing the same economic pressures at home, I have yet to read any plausible answer. I will say i think if the girl has a kid, that would help push her towards this line of work. Yet, that wouldn't explain the ones (at least 50%) who don't have children working the industry or the factory workers/maids/vendors/sales clerks, etc., who have a kid but don't work the night scene... Cardinalblue Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goodthaigirl Posted April 20, 2003 Report Share Posted April 20, 2003 Says steffi: I would still like to see a distinction made b/w somebody who has had any history in the nightlife industry and somebody who was a virgin when they married. I don't wish to offend anybody but it's my thinking that the latter is of better character than the former. I will accept like many other people that there are a lot of women in that industry because they have to be and not because they want to be. It should be truely said that those who want to be are not to be considered GTGs. (Define "want" as those who choose to stay in that industry when they are offered an opportunity out of it) I swear to God Steffi and I are different person ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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