torrenova Posted July 21, 2004 Report Share Posted July 21, 2004 For me, I can enjoy the company of a woman who has not been educated too highly but she has to be smart, clever and perhaps only denied further education by family pressure, financial circumstances etc. I have tried to make it work with farang and Thai girls who were using a 20w bulb and despite great beauty and crazy sex, I had to leave as there was fuck all to talk about. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zaad Posted July 21, 2004 Report Share Posted July 21, 2004 Soongmak, For me, those who base their RT based on education, common interests or looks are the ones who settle for less. Very good observation Never thought it that way. Zorro: ..for me it would get very boring very quickly to have to keep my English at a very basic level to be understood. Of course, same here, but your post seems to imply that no Thai girl will be able to have a more than basic conversation with you..you wrote: "no matter how well your gal speaks English she will be completely lost when it comes to idioms and the subtleties of the language" and that I disagree with. You'd be surprised of some of the girls' knowledge regarding idioms etc. They learn a lot from songs, movies, chatting with farangs etc. I'm sure there are plenty out there who're able to hold a good conversation with you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lembeh Posted July 21, 2004 Report Share Posted July 21, 2004 Having read through the thread, there seems to be a common mis-perception in it, which is equating education with intelligence. These two things are *not* the same. "Education" is as much a product of opportunity as anything else. Your postman may not have been "educated" (i.e. left school early due to circumstances), but he may well have been from what you say "intelligent". However, on the flip side, as many will attest, "education" does not automatically provide any degree of "intelligence" (above a certain basic minimum), and I am sure we all know of people who have obtained a good "education" without being troubled by anything resembling an original thought. Certainly, the majority of Thai bar girls etc are "uneducated", but they may not be un-intelligent. The number of "scams" run by these bar girls on supposedly more educated/intelligent westerners should attest to that. However, that being said, I personally find "education" or even "intellegence" to be only one factet of a relationship. Loyalty, committment, affection, common goals, a willingness to obtain those goals together, and perhaps, to me, the single most important facet of any relationship: tolerence towards the other partner. These all go together to make a relationship. -j- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pattaya127 Posted July 21, 2004 Author Report Share Posted July 21, 2004 I agree with everyone as you are all able to sort out what is in a RT for you. I guess at this point i would like to ask each one of you who know enough farangs in a LT RT (incl marriage) with an "uneducated poor" TG, intelligent or not so, what is the percentage, loosely, of real good matches. Or inversely, the percentage of such RTs that you find is below your standards of a working/loving one. Thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thalenoi Posted July 21, 2004 Report Share Posted July 21, 2004 % of real good maches? LOW, very low. But this valid for any relationship. Unfortunately, too much has to do with coincidence. You meet someone, like or dislike, get to know the other person a bit, unless you get married right away (and I know a few of these, stupid thing to do) live together to discover it will not work out months or years later. Why is the % of divorces so high? Missfits, missfits by the zillions. The chances to find a 95% match in a lifetime are close to zero and we are not educated to cope with this. That's basically why I am so upset when the "education" aspect is mentionned. Our school system is based on acquiring knowledge, it's all empirical. Psychology has made huge progress in the 20thiest century, but nothing of it has reached mankind. Making kids is easy but no one teaches you how to "educate" human beings. For those who think "It's natural", that's bullshit. The risk for a missfit in a farang/thai relationship is a lot higher due to all the cultural differences and "unknowns" at the time of early relationship where "exotism" is the main driving force. And this does not include "uneducated bg" in the equation. Nevertheless, the mixted couples I know around Chumpon seem to have settled in some type of agreement. If in the end there is a win-win situation, why not? A question to guys and the few gals on this board: have you found your fit yet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.. Posted July 21, 2004 Report Share Posted July 21, 2004 pattaya127 said:I doubt there are a lot who would have gone for a farang girl of the same background. And I asked: what makes it work and what is worth thinking about when realizing the huge cultural and educational gaps? I think that the majority of those relationships DO NOT work. Just read all the threads here about punter/BG unions and calculate the odds. Pretty slim. "I doubt there are a lot who would have gone for a farang girl of the same background. " That is the key here. It amazes me that people will marry someone here that they would not give the time of day to in their home country because they are too different. I just do not get it. Just a receipe for diaster IMHO. But what do I know? Good on ya to all those who have made it work. Cheers, SD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zorro Posted July 21, 2004 Report Share Posted July 21, 2004 Zaad amd BB I agree with you guys in so far as there are Thai women who can hold a conversation and verbal communication can be understood BUT when we are talking about nuances of the language, idioms , cultural specific stuff they are not in the frame so to speak. This is nobodys fault just the way it is. Before i moved into the IT area i was a manager at a couple of English Colleges in Australia and i dealt with some very smart cookies from all over Asia who had very high levels of English and who were going to study in Australian universtities.Many of these students had almost fluent English but it was still a chore to speak to them as there wasmuch that they didn't know and couldn't learnunless they spent many years in the country and even then they would have to have the inclination and the ability with languages. I found that the European students were much more intuitive when it came to nuances and subtelties and jokes etc. For some guys this wouldn't be important as they would be quite happy with a women who can verbally communicate effectively on an everyday level. Personally I want and expect more Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zaad Posted July 21, 2004 Report Share Posted July 21, 2004 Zorro, I understand you completely now but regarding cultural stuff, understanding jokes etc (different sense of humor)..that's very common for cross-cultural marriages (obviously) unless they're both raised in the same country (continent) for a fair amount of years. What you're in fact saying is that you don't wish to put yourself in a mixed marriage, OK, a personal choice, but IMO those are very minor issues and these in particular shouldn't keep you from marrying the person you love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pattaya127 Posted July 21, 2004 Author Report Share Posted July 21, 2004 have you found your fit yet? ----------------------------- Oh, sure...... I love myself! :: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.. Posted July 21, 2004 Report Share Posted July 21, 2004 pattaya127 said:Oh, sure...... I love myself! If you use two hands, is that considered bigamy? 555555555 Cheers, SD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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