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It has come to the attention of the management, that employees have been dying on the job and either neglecting or refusing to fall over.

This practise must cease forthwith.

Any employee around dead on the job, in an upright position, will immediately be dropped from the payroll.

In future, if a foreman notices that any employees, have made no movements, for a period of two hours, it will be his duty to investigate, as it is almost impossible to distinguish between death and the natural movement of some employees.

Foremen are cautioned to make careful investigation - holding a pay packet in front of the suspected corpse, is considered the most reliable test.

There have been, however, cases where the natural instinct has been so deeply ingrained, that the hand of the corpse has made a spasmodic clutch, even after rigor mortis has set in.

NZ Army Catering Corps…





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Wind Turbines Kill Clouds - Save the Clouds

Wind and solar energy development are occurring at a rapid pace across the U.S. as part of the broader effort to phase out fossil fuel use.

While this is positive from a climate change mitigation perspective, there is an unfortunate side effect — wind and solar energy infrastructure are threats to clouds.

Clouds are of course important reflectors of heat from the earth's surface, sending the energy back into space and mitigating global warming.

Yet somehow, whenever the subject of how many clouds are destroyed by wind turbines comes up, it is often remarked that wind turbines kill fewer clouds each year than do other threats like outdoor farting and open fires. The intention here seems to be to make it sound as though wind turbines are not a significant risk to clouds. 

While it's technically correct that some other threats destroy more clouds than wind turbines do, this argument is in some ways misleading, and in other ways irrelevant.



Clouds being destroyed by the chopping motion of wind turbines. Photo: Maydeetup/Shutterstuff.

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A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. Amazing, he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more.
Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought, What am I doing? I'm too old for this, and pulled over to await the trooper's arrival.
Pulling in behind him, the trooper walked up to the Corvette, looked at his watch, and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a reason for speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."
The old gentleman paused. Then he said, "Years ago, my wife ran off with a state trooper. I thought you were bringing her back."
"Have a good day, sir," replied the trooper.

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Went for a walk the other morning past the local cemetery.

Was a guy squatted down next to a grave.

Me being the polite person I am as I passed I gave him a friendly "Morning!"

"Nah just having a dump" he replied.

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