going nuts....

[buddha]

It seems my lifestyle has driven me quite mad. I am making an all out attempt to end nightlife activity altogether for at least a month. What I had thought was a passing phase continues to ramp itself up night after night.

 

I party way tooo much: beer, cigarettes [i had quit], and lots of other crap that we can't talk about on the board.

 

I am with a new woman/women every night of the week.

 

I have a steady stream of daytime women who 'pop' by my apartment.

 

Blackouts are not becoming the norm, but they have increased significantly. Until about 4 months ago I experienced this in college only a couple times. I had several last week alone.

 

I am currently unemployed and ripping through my paltry 'nest egg'. I was fired due to the nightlife affecting my ability to perform or even show up.

 

Several bargirls have sat me down for the 'talk': 'Hey, you are going nuts and need to slow down...'

 

I do partake in a good deal of positive activities;however, I am currently the poster child for what not to do when in bangkok.

 

I have a discussion with myself every morning on how I am going to shape up, I have managed to continue a hard core workout routine, but this is mainly out of vanity...

 

I am 1 cm away from losing it.....I cannot take my own 'concentrate on the fundamentals' advcie that several of you patted me on the back for posting.

 

Any go through this?

[buddha]

I am currently very drunk and feeling a bit vulnerable.

[The_Munchmaster]

Sorry to hear this Buddha. The only thing I can suggest is to leave Thailand, at least for a while. Try somewhere else that doesn't have so many distractions. See how you feel in 6 months or a year. You might decide that you are better living outside LOS and just visiting.

[MooNoi]

Exactly what I was going to say, Munchie.

 

Go home. Simple as that.

 

You're addicted. Same as to gambling, cigs, drugs... it's an addiction.

 

To break the addiction, you need to remove the temptation.

 

Hang in there, Buddha.

 

I'm sure that some people on the board can put you in touch with people who can help if you need it - and it sounds like you do.

[Rex7777]

I think you may just need a change of scenery. Instead of Bangkok, try someplace a bit more remote that you've never been to. Phuket? Samui? Koh Pangan? Go someplace where it takes some work to hit the bars. Give yourself a six month break.

 

Rex

 

 

[The_Munchmaster]

Phuket!! You've got to be kidding. The place is awash with bars and girls. It also sounds like Buddha needs to replenish his bank account and he ain't going to do that in any of these places.

[Mekong]

Moo Noi said

 

Go home. Simple as that.

 

You're addicted. Same as to gambling, cigs, drugs... it's an addiction.

 

To break the addiction, you need to remove the temptation.

 

I agree with 2 out of 3 of the comments.

 

Been there,done it myself I put myself into profitable rehab, I took an assignment back in Saudi, 16 weeks back in the Desert 2 weeks home in Bangkok, it saved my life.

 

Buddha, you have made the most important step, Identifying the problem, even though I (and others) take the piss out of you sometimes, we will always try to offer support. Get away from temptation, build up the nest egg and consider your options, once you have had the chance to reevaluate life and your options you will come back stronger.

[buddha]

hi.

 

I appreciate the sincere responses. I realize that I am 100% at fault here and still have a sense of humor. Feel free to take the piss if need be. Sometimes the best realizations come after a kick when down.

 

Leaving is not an option for me at this point. Without getting into any specifics a trip 'Home' is more trouble than where I am at.

 

I am a true hardcase at this moment in time. I really don't acknowledge any addiction I just really enjoy how I am living right now. The severe reality is that my mental health is declining and that I am not howard hughes.

 

I am going to make a big turn around starting tomorrow, but for now It's off to p-pong. I'll be the guy ringing the bell and barfining everyone.

 

It all hedges on my two favorite sayings as I drunkenly sway back and forth in front of the ATM:

 

'you only live once'...followed by...'tomorrow I can clean up my act.'

 

Please don't get cauught up in feeling sorry for me, i don't. The purpose of the thread was not for pity just to document my spiral....

 

*lights cigarette

*pops singha

*puts on dancing shoes and staggers to the door....

[HeartThais]

At least you aren't addicted to meth. After you burn through the last of your money, at least you'll still have your teeth and good looks.

 

I say don't sweat it. You'll go broke, maybe go hungry for a while, and then you'll hit rock bottom and start to rebuild your life. Having projects like that make the time on Earth go faster.

 

But if that doesn't sound all that appealing, you should probably see a psychiatrist. It sounds to me like you are depressed and suffering from some common symptoms: poor impulse control, substance abuse, and sex addiction. I don't think it's your lifestyle that's causing your deteriorating mental state but the other way around.

[junglesoup]

Yep, you probably enjoy the drinking so much, but maybe even now when your drinking you are even feeling depressed. Its not a nice feeling.

I left Thailand for the same reasons as you. But I know myself, that I would drink. I make that conscious decision. I enjoy it.

However you have to call it a day and take a good break from it for a while...recharge the batteries. we ll not go into defining what an alcoholic is...I answer yes to lots of the questions on AA,and so do alot of my friends. But we dont see ourselves as alcoholics...why? Because I make a decision to stop. Havent really drank in a year.

yes, have your good time, but realise when its becoming a vicious circle. I go periods of drinking nearly everyday for 6 months to a year, or maybe drink for 6 weeks, then off again for a 6 weeks.

It takes alot of will power to do it. Youll learn alot about yourself. You have ahd your fun now. Now take a step back and get a new interest. Take up a new hobby.

I try to take up something new each time I stop. Set up some goals, and do something psotive for yourself man. The first few weeks will be the hardest, but you can do it, with lots of willpower and looking at what you will be gaining by not drinking. List the positives and affirm them to yourself everyday.

Again the most important thing is to get something to do...

 

I ll give you brief story Buddha about my experience in bangkok while drinking and not drinking...

 

I arrived here in the wet season with a fair amount of money. Had been working hard, so knew I would be letting off steam. basically I went out drinking all the time. I would head out early afternoon, have a dozen beers, then move on to spirits and go for shortimes in the evening, then go out again and drink and maybe go back with another girl in the wee hours of the morning...this pattern would go on for weeks. I was doing something 3 days a week wrok related but it didnt take up enough time to spoil the party. Basically did this for 5/6 months. I just knew it was time to stop. I made promises and pledges I would stop to myself.

I started off by cleaning my room and organising things so that I could stay organised. Bought porridge and healthy food, and decided to get up early every morning and go for a swim, steam room and then sit down and do something productive for the day. This worked well for about a week untilt the weekend came around. The I would go and get fucked up on drink, but having a good time. The plan was to stop for Monday, but my weekend carried on to the next weekend and before you know it 3 weeks of solid drinking had came and went. Again, I made the same pledges again, and again I would start drinking and partying. I realised that I didnt have enough goals set and therefor would find myself by early evening with nothing to do or aim for, so I would go out.

 

So I again attempted to get myself inline. I started to going each day to the Stock Exchange of Thailand resource centre which was just down the road from me. I would go there after breakfast, and sit in the library and read investment books and learn about economics,trading etc. They have an excellent resource center which is free. It was an altogether positive place. Lots of young Thais and the odd farang there studying and learning.

I got interested inlearning some stuff and this made it easier to remain positive and to stay focused. I decided, I would return home, but before that I would go ona final blowout with my remaining money. I went mad for another 6 weeks then went home fresh in my mind that I would be knuckling down to continue learning and nurturing my new found knowledge.

As I say I ve only been drinking socially when I come back. I m working and have started my own business, trading online. Things are looking up.

The biggest lesson I ve learnt from all this is that you need to come to the LOS with a plan and something to do. I think alot of people come, myself included with the mind set of having lots of fun and then starting to find our balance. Its dificult to do that way. Now when I return to LOS I will be better prepared with a portable business which I can do from anywhere. Yes I will go out and have my fun. But at least now I know that I ve something to bring me back in. whereas before it was too easy just to drift.

 

Hope everything works out well for you, and good luck. This isnt the end of the fun. LOS will still be there when you return, that is if you go home. But it sounds like a good idea to. Good luck