Meeting stunning non-bargirls. A discussion.

[Sarisin]

[color:"red"] You are so correct about moving between two worlds. It sure sure feels like two worlds and the girls themselves contribute to this aspect.

 

I enjoy the bar scene if only to vege out. But the superficiality of it all over time wears on you. Yet, it is sure nice to just run down to nana disco for physical satisfaction.[/color]

 

I agree. It is nice to have options which most of the guys reading this don't have. Every day I thank the Man Upstairs that I am fortunate enough to live and work in the LOS.

 

[color:"red"] Has any non BGs ever ask you about the BG scene such as patpong, soi 4, or lady bar? If this subject comes up, I play as stupid and ignorant as possible and quickly try to change the topic.......it doesn't help that i live on soi 4 which does carry a stigma to it. My thai teacher is always using in her examples nanaplaza or lady bar examples.[/color]

 

Of course this topic comes up. I wrote about this topic on the paysite. If you date a straight girl more than once it WILL come up. I always try to tapdance away from this topic as my experience tells me the lady is throwing you a live hand grenade. Although some may profess liberal attitudes towards the bar scene, I think the vast majority detest it and everything it represents (whatever that might be). If you associate yourself with that scene you are doomed to failure with the lady.

 

I had a very nice relationship with a Thai Air airhostess go up in smoke when my bar life intersected briefly with my straight girl life. I am still in touch with this honey, but unfortunately, now she knows I am 'unclean' and therefore not serious about a relationship.

 

[color:"red"] It is nice though to have a normal conversation with someone who is not constantly worried about how is she going to pay the rent or other financial obligations. This aspect alone makes it feels less like a sugar daddy role and more like a normal relationship (where instant money is not the driving mnotivator). [/color]

 

Absolutely! This is clearly one of the great advantages of dating a straight girl. The bargirl litany gets old fast and, yet, you hear it over and over again whenever you take a bargirl home. For me now it is just background noise.

 

As I have said before, relationships (hence sex as well) are the best with straight girls because they care for you, not necessarily the balance in your bank account. I am sure there are exceptions on both sides of the fence, but this has been my experience with the straight girls I have dated. They really go out of their way to pay for everything as if it is in the Rule Book or something. When was the last time your honey from Rainbow 2 snatched a restaurant bill away from you and paid for it?

 

I am enjoying this exchange with you CB, but, I have to go to the bars soon and meet my friend.

 

hahaha, what a &^%$!@ hypocrite, eh?

[Guest]

""As I have said before, relationships (hence sex as well) are the best with straight girls because they care for you, not necessarily the balance in your bank account. "

 

If this is the case, why do you mention that you believe a major success factor to be the type of work you do (implied as being well paid) as displayed on your business card. That doesnt add up

 

"simply say Sawasdee-khrap and hand her one of my business cards. I ask her to call or email me when she has time. That's it.

 

I would say 9 of 10 do this"

 

 

Thanks for the input, but Im seriously doubting the "9 out of 10" statistic. Are these women "stunners", or just averagely attractive women? I suspect that over 50% of Bkk women are in a relationship or married already, which should rule them out (if it doesnt, then they have proved themselves untrustworty from the outset), and probably 90% of stunners are. I also suspect that some Thai women, but by no means most, are interested in getting to know a farang man.

 

If they do contact you, how do you know which one they were, and where you met. You can get caught on this subject by the girl very easily, in her quest to find out just how many cards you've handed out in your mass search for girls. They definitely wont like being just one a possible herd of girls you've met in the same way.

 

 

 

I tried a similar technique, and had a 1 out of 5 email success rate. I gave it up, and prefer to chat to them for a minute or two instead. Only 1 has ever had the guts to call me, and Ive given my number to perhaps 30 stunners. Even once I get a stunners number, its hard work meeting up with them again. I suspect that many of them give me their number out of embarrassment rather than out of wanting to get to know a farang guy. I dont actually want any more than 4 girls, as I like to see them at least once a week each. I now have that magic figure, so Im happy.

 

 

Greg, I usually hang out in the shopping malls for a few hours per day, just looking at the girls. Ive probably spent a few hours per day for maybe 100 days so far this year doing this, so Im getting to be quite an expert. Id say that its got to the point where 999 out of 1000 girls are of no interest to me now; Ive narrowed down my physical tastes to perfection. Then the fact that most of the stunners are indeed spoiled bitches with bad attitudes kicks in, although less so than back in the West. When that is the case, it usually goes nowhere beyond getting their phone number. If I call them, they act completley disinterested. However, Ive met a couple of stunners who actually admitted that the had been single for a while a they couldnt find a good Thai man! I get maybe 1 or 2 phone numbers per week (I see maybe 10 to 15 stunners per week, but most are with boys or a boyfriend, so unapproachable, or act scared!), and of those I probably take things further with only one a month. But that has given me the 4 girls that I now have regular contact with, 4 girls who I would consider to be amonst the most beautiful girls on the planet. It was hard work and time consuming to find them, but well worth it.

[jasmine]

[color:"red"]but Im seriously doubting the "9 out of 10" statistic. [/color]

 

When I read the stats I also have doubt, but how would I know, I don't even live in Thailand?

 

The word "stunners' is relative. When I see some women who some of my male friends find attractive, I disagree. Sounds to me that an avergage looking women have no chance here?

 

I feel that most Thai women look relatively good in general but each to his own.

 

4 women, don't you call them by the wrong name?

 

If I were a man one at a time will be adequate, but that is just my 2 cents.

 

Cheers!

[Guest]

Im only sleeping with two of them. The other two remain at the friendship level, kept in reserve in case the two bed partners happen to meet at my apartment one evening!!! ::

[pattaya127]

I agree. It is nice to have options which most of the guys reading this don't have. Every day I thank the Man Upstairs that I am fortunate enough to live and work in the LOS.

--------------------------

 

Not relating to you, but it's been rather my experience that most guys who settled in LOS, even having gotten married, were still heavily drawing from their early addiction to the P4P nightlife, if they started their stay with a strong dose of it. As I am not sure how long you have been staying in BKK, maybe you could tell us yourself if it's only after a few years that you really got to be on average more interested in non- working girls, meaning your barfine average or freelancer pick-ups took a big nose-dive compared to old game dating, or if you got quickly tired of the nightlife trade very early on. My personal opinion about this, from observation and also my own feelings is that one does not so much get tired of the scene itself, but rather get tired of oneself, wasting so many nights away, month after month, and like any addiction, one day you look at yourself in the mirror, possibly, and just really think it's time to move on and stop making everyday the same it was the day before, and the day before and the day.........

[greg]

So you hang around shopping malls and just approach girls?

 

Dont think Ive got the balls for that.

 

Smeg Im homing in on your technique more because like you I am not working so the business card thing is no good.

Also I assume you cannot speak Thai, so how do you manage to start a conversation??

 

Perhaps Im just shit with girls

 

[cardinalblue]

smeg,

 

I do believe that regular girls care about what type of job you have and the image and your position in the community. I think less likely about the cash directly though there is a strong correlation between job and dollars. How many BGs ask you about what type of job do you have and then ask you a follow-up question about the job itself? They have absolutely no interest because they have no basic uderstanding of various jobs. All they care about is do you have the cash to cover whatever costs you are going to initiate with her. The regular girl speculates more about her future and her financial security if she enters into a relationship with you. It is not the pay as you go approach as you have with BGs.....

 

Regarding stunners, i think unless you get a common criteria, this is a moot point to debate. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.....

 

Regarding 50% of regular girls having bfs, I cannot agree. I would say only about 25% have bfs or husbands. There is a huge percentage of single available women between 20 and 30 in the working world. This is one of the great things about dating thai regular girls compared to what is available in the West. I have found BGs to have a much higher rate of thai relationships because of many factors which for the sake of space, I won't go into it. The short answer is regular girls are more selective and have more control over their life than do BGs. Rarely do you find a regular girl completely supporting a deadbeat bf/husband as you find in the BG world. Quite common may i add............

 

Cardinalblue

[Guest]

This thread is getting good!!

About the malls I hang out there quite often too but I'm a bit shy to approach the girls.Last year in Emporium though a funny thing happenned.I was walking around with an italian friend who considers shynness a deadly sin.He followed a group of quite young good looking thai girls in the department store,tried to talk to one of them and she replied "Fuck off!here is not Patpong!" Ouch!I've sen this guy beeing given the cold shoulder quite a few times but he never cared.Got his way sometimes too.He'll be back in few months.Looking forward to see him again!

 

[Sarisin]

smeg,

 

Thank you for your comments and excellent points.

 

Without getting too much into my professional (and private) life I can say that what I do does have a positive effect on the ratio of respondents I receive. I don't think it has a thing to do with money because I am sure the girls don't have a clue how much I make. I think the key is in the way you present yourself to the lady and I happen to find this technique works for me.

 

If it doesn't work for you, fine. You have posted what does work and I think that is great. That is what this board is about. Helping others, providing feedback and options.

 

I did not keep a record of the respondents, but very few did not respond. So, I stand by the 90% rate.

 

As others have mentioned, they may have been stunners to me and not to you or vice versa. Who cares anyway? All I can say is don't you think I would be inclined to try to meet attractive ladies vs. turdlings? Of course I am.

 

And, cardinalblue makes a great point. There are many, many straight Thai girls not in relationships. I speak to the young Thai ladies who work for/with me and am always amazed at the response I get when I ask them what they did over the weekend. The most common answer: stay at home.

 

Anyway, I could go on, but I have to go out to the 'pong tonight with friends. But, I bet you I meet a nice straight girl on the BTS on the way there.

[Sarisin]

Good points 127 and I do not disagree with your views, but choose to amplify them a bit based on my experience.

 

I have been living in Bangkok over six years with 18 months before that of regular visits from Hanoi where I worked.

 

Honestly, I have had a mix of bargirls and straight girls since I came to Thailand. And, that is the hard part for me - juggling the two groups. Both clearly have advantages and disadvantages when you are dating them. The diversity of the two groups is a big source of the interest for me.

 

I think you are right though that I was more heavy on the bar scene the first few years I was here, but now it is more 50-50. There are times I get down on the bar scene, but there are likewise bad experiences I have with straight girls which cause me to enjoy my time in the bars more.

 

I think the original question is the HOW of meeting the straight girls rather than the WHY, but let's face it, you really do need the motivation to want to meet straight ladies. And, my main motivation is that I like the variety straight ladies provide when compared with the bargirls. But, in the end, hey, they are all Thai ladies and that is why I can easily move from group to group without missing a beat. One of the top reasons I have decided to stay on in Thailand and make it my home is the interesting fair sex whether they be legal assistants or gogo dancers.