khunsanuk Posted October 30, 2003 Report Share Posted October 30, 2003 Hi, "If they were serious, I agree that it is inappropriate thing to say." Ah, so it is inappropriate for a guy to receive money for marrying, but it is fine for the girl's mother to ask money for her daughter (and 10 times the 'going rate' at that). Sorry, but if it is okay for a family to request money for their daughter, then I see no problem with the reverse either. Sanuk! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HSTEACH Posted October 30, 2003 Author Report Share Posted October 30, 2003 I tend to think my GF thinks she's being sold off too. She doesn't like it at all, but being of a different era, being 36, still was brought up to think mom was not one to question. Quite different for some younger Thai women who do their own thing, with or without mom's permission. She's apparently coming up with Plan B. to convince mom she's being unreasonable with her demands. This I believe involves a brother who lives in BKK. In a talk last night, I asked her what mom really intended to do with so much money. I was curious what the hell she would actually do if I did bow to her demand and paid the 300,000, which BTW will be a cold day in hell when that happens. The answer, give most to the monks to finish the new temple. The "new" temple from what I could tell on a visit this summer, is a shell of a building that looks like it;s been sitting there for the last 10 years untouched. Mom it seems wants to be the benefactor that finishes the temple gaining a hell of a lot of face by doing so. My idea of meeting with mom, displaying a wad of money to try to sway her demands, seems to have a few holes in it. Mainly I think I'd be a little dumb carrying that much cash around. might not make it back to BKK. Maybe travelor's checks, maybe a "madeup" check. That may all be moot by the time I come in December, maybe Plan B will be accepted, but on the other hand, who knows. TIT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 30, 2003 Report Share Posted October 30, 2003 Yeah, I don't understand the whole thing about bringing the 100,000K baht to the villiage. Is this a sinsot or ransom demand? Good to hear that you are going to take WYD's advice on this one. As they say, "don't get caught slippin on the wrong side of town without your Glock" Rug Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest lazyphil Posted October 30, 2003 Report Share Posted October 30, 2003 <<Sorry, but if it is okay for a family to request money for their daughter, then I see no problem with the reverse either>> Me too, but those lasses in your office know whats what in Thai culture and whats expected and were being a bit snide. I find this appropriating xyz amount of money for this girl or that girl tasteless and ugly to say the least.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pattaya127 Posted October 30, 2003 Report Share Posted October 30, 2003 Ah, so it is inappropriate for a guy to receive money for marrying ---------------------- Sorry, but i lost the plot. Which guy are you talking about here? :: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
khunsanuk Posted October 30, 2003 Report Share Posted October 30, 2003 Hi, "but those lasses in your office know whats what in Thai culture and whats expected and were being a bit snide." No, I don't think so. The one that made the comment got married last yeat, no sin sod was asked or given. Sanuk! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jasmine Posted October 30, 2003 Report Share Posted October 30, 2003 [color:"red"] "If they were serious, I agree that it is inappropriate thing to say." [/color] You misunderstood my comment KS. What I said was that it was none of those people business, the least, to express the opinion based on what they hear and judging the woman (GF) on her age and education. The issue involved whether asking money for sinsod nor dowery was not in my intent. Jasmine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jasmine Posted October 30, 2003 Report Share Posted October 30, 2003 [color:"red"] My idea of meeting with mom, displaying a wad of money to try to sway her demands, seems to have a few holes in it. Mainly I think I'd be a little dumb carrying that much cash around. might not make it back to BKK. [/color] Very good common sense HST. IMO, your GF has a very good point though about letting her see the possible cash, we have a phrase in Thai that "Hen ngen ta look" = "Money talks" in the West. I would arrange her to meet you and your GF in a neutral ground, such as a bank that you can deposit money back or just showing her a bank account of the amount. She is selling her daughter allright. How about thinking like a Thai, her milk was worth at least that much (100,000 Baht) to raise your future wife!!! Take care, Jasmine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
khunsanuk Posted October 30, 2003 Report Share Posted October 30, 2003 Hi, "What I said was that it was none of those people business, the least, to express the opinion based on what they hear and judging the woman (GF) on her age and education." The way I see it is, that if it is okay for a mother to set a price on her daughter's marriage (and future life), then what is wrong with others judging the amount? Sanuk! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jitagawn Posted October 30, 2003 Report Share Posted October 30, 2003 This is to HS TEACH- I have monitored this thread in amazement my friend and am astonished at the load of shit you are having to wade through...amazing thialand. I hope you see your way through this mess, some how stay with your girl and maintain YOUR "face" OH THAT RIGHT FARANGS HAVE NO FACE- I FORGOT- :: .BEAR IN MIIND HER MOM MIGHT BE THERE FOREVER WITH HER HAND OUT ---NOT SOMETHING TO FORGET What aload of crap- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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