MaiLuk Posted July 16, 2006 Report Share Posted July 16, 2006 AF16, Quote: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- MaiLuk said: Don't go there and be Mr Niceguy for chrissakes. That is certain death for your relationship. Go to her bar and see her as promised, then barfine the hottest looking girl in the bar and leave. If your original girl does not come begging you to take her back and to get her a visa to belgium, then forget about her. If she does come begging, make her suffer for awhile. Then tell her no visa until she proves herself. OTOH, you can go and BF her and take her on a trip to koh samui or some place and tell her that if she would just give you a chance, YOU will prove yourself to HER. Yeah. That'll sweep her off her feet. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I can not see how that would work. It would be to build a relationship on fear and humiliation, why would you want to do that to someone you love and why should it be a good thing for either you or her? The point here is that being Mr niceguy does not really impress most BGs nor many non-BGs. Obviously if she does not love him then drogon should just bail out. But he says he is not going to. Since he is not going to bail out, why not play the game in a different way? Why continue in the same manner that turned her off to begin with? And yes its a fucking game what else can it be called? She will not only get over the humiliation, she might even take a different view of drogon. She may not decide she is suddenly in love with him, but at least drogon will hjave regained some control over the situation. Barfining another basically demonstrates to her and more importantly to drogon himself that he is not under her control anymore. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AF16 Posted July 16, 2006 Report Share Posted July 16, 2006 MaiLuk said:AF16, Quote: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- MaiLuk said: Don't go there and be Mr Niceguy for chrissakes. That is certain death for your relationship. Go to her bar and see her as promised, then barfine the hottest looking girl in the bar and leave. If your original girl does not come begging you to take her back and to get her a visa to belgium, then forget about her. If she does come begging, make her suffer for awhile. Then tell her no visa until she proves herself. OTOH, you can go and BF her and take her on a trip to koh samui or some place and tell her that if she would just give you a chance, YOU will prove yourself to HER. Yeah. That'll sweep her off her feet. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I can not see how that would work. It would be to build a relationship on fear and humiliation, why would you want to do that to someone you love and why should it be a good thing for either you or her? The point here is that being Mr niceguy does not really impress most BGs nor many non-BGs. Obviously if she does not love him then drogon should just bail out. But he says he is not going to. Since he is not going to bail out, why not play the game in a different way? Why continue in the same manner that turned her off to begin with? And yes its a fucking game what else can it be called? She will not only get over the humiliation, she might even take a different view of drogon. She may not decide she is suddenly in love with him, but at least drogon will hjave regained some control over the situation. Barfining another basically demonstrates to her and more importantly to drogon himself that he is not under her control anymore. There are diffrent ways to get respect and show that you are not a pushover. Fucking someone else and make her beg to come back is not one of them. It does not show that you are a man, it show that you are an asshole. If it does work, it's not the kind of girl you want? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drogon Posted July 16, 2006 Author Report Share Posted July 16, 2006 Let me precise a few things. - I am going to drop except if she really proves that she is commited to it -> ready to do big efforts. I feel we do not "clik" really. - To barfine another one will not be an issue.....she already asked me help a friend of her who is begining in the bar trade to "teach her" what to do etc..-> read she pimps her friend. (not really pimping as it is free, no LT/ST fee etc...) She told me that if she is bedding other men then she does not see why I could not bed other women. I will see her not because I must (I would really prefer to send a mail) just because I made a promis and when I do so I stick to my word. As we have always been honest to each others I can not take the easiest way out, so will have to tell her and explain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Hippie Posted July 16, 2006 Report Share Posted July 16, 2006 Let's face facts here, it speaks volumes about the punter's here as much as anything. Speaking for myself, oh what the hell, everyone else in the same boat, I would argue we have some issue, some psycological quirk that makes us get into this mess, and stay there. I am sure you will find most of us in this situation have some sort of problem with abandonment or what ever, I know I do. Then of cousre, there is the whole thing about wanting what we can't have...I am sure if ASSG decided I could fuck her again, then it would not be a problem for me, and I would care less if at all. But as that "wall" or "Barrier" is up, and I have been put into this whole different category, I have serious issue with it, I mean what hurts more than a woman who prefers to be a whore, than to be with you? They know this, and play on it. As for plenty of other women, yes, true, but that isn't the point. Analogy time here. As A kid, I was basically poor, bouncing around the foster care system. I got hand me down clothes, government lunches etc...somewhere along the line, I developed a stubborn streak, and I decided that if I could not have exactly what I wanted, then I would rather have nothing, until I could have what it was I wanted, I would not bend yeild or compromise...stubborn? yes Foolish? yes...am I better in many aspect for it? Debateable... Point is, this issue that drives me in one aspect, also drives me in another. Whether it is being kept out of a club because I am the wrong religion/ethnicity, or barred from a night club or restaurant because I don't have the right clothes or not invited some place because I am not one of the "in crowd." whatever, I resent being shut out for some stupid arbitrary reason. Are there other clubs, restaurants etc to go to? yes, but the principle remains the same, I hate arbitrary barriers and bullshit. Same is true with whores, but perhapes a slightly different issue...oh, wait, I am rambling...where were we...? oh yeah, Drogon is pretty much fucked no matter what, so am I, we both need Professional help for our issues. Have a nice day... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MaiLuk Posted July 16, 2006 Report Share Posted July 16, 2006 OH: Professional help not needed as long as you can vent here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MaiLuk Posted July 16, 2006 Report Share Posted July 16, 2006 AF16, >>There are diffrent ways to get respect and show that you are not a pushover.<< That is true if you are dealing with a certain type of woman. Here we are dealing with a BG/punter situation which means money and audacity rules the day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Hippie Posted July 16, 2006 Report Share Posted July 16, 2006 MaiLuk said:OH: Professional help not needed as long as you can vent here. No, trust me dude, I am seriously fucked up for a whole host of reasons, not helped by SSG...but yes, venting here does help...WHY DID MY MOTHER GIVE ME UP AT BIRTH? AND WHY WON'T SHE TALK TO ME NOW? maybe she reads this board and is embarrassed to have such a fucked up winer for a son? :banghead: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AF16 Posted July 16, 2006 Report Share Posted July 16, 2006 MaiLuk said:AF16, >>There are diffrent ways to get respect and show that you are not a pushover.<< That is true if you are dealing with a certain type of woman. Here we are dealing with a BG/punter situation which means money and audacity rules the day. Perhaps, or perhaps this line of thought is one reason why many of these types of relationsips strand. 'She is a BG so I have to treat her bad?' Yes, the likelyhood of mone getting you the girl is larger with a BG, but is that the way you want to score? I also think many TG like a man in charge, due to the culture being more man friendly, but that does not mean treating her bad. If you get a girl who like to be treated bad I'd think twice about going further my self. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nervous_Dog Posted July 16, 2006 Report Share Posted July 16, 2006 <<Let me precise a few things.>> No please, let me! <<- I am going to drop except if she really proves that she is commited to it ->> SHE DOESNT WANT YOU! Nothing to prove! You saying this is just your way of "Trying" yet again and again and again to prove your her hero, YOUR NOT. <<I feel we do not "clik" really.>> Thats news, if so DONT DO THE ABOVE, SHE DOESN:T WANT YOU TOO <<she already asked me help a friend of her who is begining in the bar trade to "teach her" what to do etc..->> Do you even listen to her? SHE DOESN'T WANT YOU <<She told me that if she is bedding other men then she does not see why I could not bed other women.>> IE SHE DOESN:T WANT YOU MAN WAKE UP, SHE DOESNT WANT YOU <<I will see her not because I must (I would really prefer to send a mail) just because I made a promis and when I do so I stick to my word.>> OK - how can I be subtle here, SHE DOESNT WANT YOU TOO, she is happy telling you she is fucking other men, all other girls lie about this, she isn;t because SHE DOESNT WANT YOU <<As we have always been honest to each others I can not take the easiest way out, so will have to tell her and explain. >> Listen PLEASE, it is easy to be honest with someone when you DONT CARE OR THEM. If she had a ounce of respect for you she'd be saying she doesn;t fucck but she's honest because she DOESNT LIKE YOU, not ONE LITTLE BIT, your a whiney pain in the arse to her, she is honest because she is hoping you may JSUT LISTEN TO WHAT SHE IS SAYING. Listen to her, no need to see her, dont go there, forget about bullshit promises coz you only made them to PLEASE YOURSELF NOT HER!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drogon Posted July 16, 2006 Author Report Share Posted July 16, 2006 I listen to you. You might be totally right but you are not in my shoes nor in hers. ->the full picture. Although I think you are right I would like to hear your arguementation please. I just asked a friend who was at university with me (she is psychologist) to give me her opinion on this and she has quite a different opinion on this. (I admit she has been reading all the sms-mail etc....) -> to sum it up: the miss is not in love but could be and not for financial reasons exclusively but for the security of being with someone who trusts her -> but it will need a lot of time and efforts. So sorry ND but you will need to give me valid arguments that can be demonstrated. Saying that some is blind and do/don't, without giving backing his/her point of view is not valid to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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