Why Don't Most Thais See The Big Picture?

MooNoi · August 11, 2005

Yes, I love Thai people - their courtesy, grace, humour, friendliness and all that jazz that we are all aware of and are a big part of the reason we, and other tourists, keep coming back to Thailand.

But sometimes they can also frustrate the hell out of me!

Why don't most Thais see "the big picture?" and have more of an open mind.

I'll give 3 examples that kind of illustrate what I mean.

1: Thais and motorbike helmets.

Ok, compared to a few years ago, most Thais riding on the front of the bike wear a motorbike helmet - even in the country towns where it used to be virtually non-practice.

Now, my idea of a wearing a motorbike helmet is to protect my head in case of an accident. Most Thai helmets are useless - you'd be better of with an upside-down ice cream container with a rubber band attached. If you crash you're more likely to end up with a sharp piece of plastic embedded in your skull rather than have your head protected. It seems to me that Thais wear motorbike helmets not to protect themselves in case of an accident, but so they don't get fined.

How many times do you see a man or woman on a motorbike wearing a helmet with their kid sitting on the fuel tank NOT wearing one? Don't they care about their kids? What happens to the kid if they crash when he/she is not wearing a helmet? It makes me so mad seeing this. No wonder the road death toll's so high. Is it lack of education about road usage/potential injuries, a Buddhist sense of "mai pen rai/Buddha take care" or just total ignorance that Thais don't get why they should wear a motorbike helmet?

2. Closed Mindedness

I read on a post in the Regional Sanuk section that a poster was in Malaysia and his wife didn't like it there because "there was no Thai food". Ok, I understand that Thai people like Thai food. But why are they mostly so narrow-minded when it comes to trying new things? Us farangs mostly love trying different foods - Thai, Japanese, French, Italian etc. etc. Why aren't Thais the same? Malay food is still Asian food and its delicious, but Thais don't even think that it might be broadening their horizons and expanding their tastes to something new. Does this get back to the "Thailand was never colonised" issue, therefore citing a lack of outside cultural influence in Thailand?

3. Bar Girl With Good Offer

A friend of mine fell for a girl working in soi 6 (Yodsak) in Pattaya. Now, working in Soi 6, she was definitely a ST sort of girl! She shared a manky apartment in Pattaya with her 2 sisters which cost her 1500B per month. She was one of the better looking and nicer girls in the soi by all accounts, and told him that she used to go for 2-3 ST's a day on average. So she was making about 1000B a day or so. (Give or take). So lets say 30000B a month. She said she used to send 10000B home to her parents each month. They went on holidays together and he was mad about her. He's a nice guy, young, reasonable looking with a good job and not a butterfly when he's attached. They would have made a nice couple. She quite often told him she didn't enjoy working in the bar but needed to earn the money. (The usual story).

He decided that she was the girl for him and asked her to move in with him. He said she could live with him in his luxury condo, he'd give her 10000B per month for her family and 10000B per month for her to do as she pleased. She wouldn't have to pay for food or electricity or anything of that nature. If she wanted to get a job as a bar cashier, waitress or something similar, or go to do a course in beauty therapy or the like, he was prepared to help her with that too. She refused and dumped him saying she "liked him", but he "wasn't offering enough money". Ok, by my reckoning, she was getting a bit less that she would be earning at the bar in soi 6. But she would have had a nice loving guy, nice apartment with aircon, shower, TV, nice view etc. etc, 20000B income per month for doing relatively nothing (which is still damn good by Thai wage standards), and would not have to work long hours at the bar shagging numerous (and quite often ugly) blokes facing the risk of STD's and other nasties. She defintiely has a "use by" date in the bar industry, (and what does she do then?), but this guy would have cared for her for a long time (if not marry her) and she would have been set. But for her, she couldn't see past the next week let alone planning for her future. Why?!!!

As I said, I love Thailand and its people, but sometimes they do drive me crazy. What other incidents or traits of Thai life make you shake your head and say "what the...?"

FlyP. :banghead:

Redbaron · August 11, 2005

Couldn't agree with you more Fly.. and I had this exact conversation with my better half earlier on in the year..

On the food she agreed, most Thais weren't interested in any other cuisines... she compared them to 1 or 2 relatives of mine who would never eat anything but Aussie/English food.

On the bike helmets, yep, 90%+ of them only wear them to avoid a fine. That's why only one person is often wearing one, and, as you point out... they are hardly the best quality. I did laugh when I saw one chap with an amazing helmet, top of the range (or at least a good copy of) Mick Doohan type helmet, but it was in the basket.... didn't want to damage it in an accident see?

Your third conundrum reminds me of Miss Red's (ex?)boss, she has/had a few "husbands" on the go, and from the way she described them they all sounded like ideal husbands, but she generally gave them the flick when either the money ran out, she found a better offer or she got bored.. Then again I'm sure some of the stories were a bit exaggerated.

Nervous_Dog · August 11, 2005

Agree with everything you say, and SO glad my wife is totally different.

However, reading what you say, I could also say it covers a lot of middle America, suberban Australia etc.

Ever seen fellow Aussies eating in Bali? I did last week, if they had rice more than once a day they thought they'd die.

Thing is you and I are seeing people at their homes, go to other countries, and often, (Maybe not as bad, maybe worse) they are very similar to what you describe.

DOG

Old Hippie · August 11, 2005

"...3. Bar Girl With Good Offer

A friend of mine fell for a girl working in soi 6 (Yodsak) in Pattaya. Now, working in Soi 6, she was definitely a ST sort of girl! She shared a manky apartment in Pattaya with her 2 sisters which cost her 1500B per month. She was one of the better looking and nicer girls in the soi by all accounts, and told him that she used to go for 2-3 ST's a day on average. So she was making about 1000B a day or so. (Give or take). So lets say 30000B a month. She said she used to send 10000B home to her parents each month. They went on holidays together and he was mad about her. He's a nice guy, young, reasonable looking with a good job and not a butterfly when he's attached. They would have made a nice couple. She quite often told him she didn't enjoy working in the bar but needed to earn the money. (The usual story).

He decided that she was the girl for him and asked her to move in with him. He said she could live with him in his luxury condo, he'd give her 10000B per month for her family and 10000B per month for her to do as she pleased. She wouldn't have to pay for food or electricity or anything of that nature. If she wanted to get a job as a bar cashier, waitress or something similar, or go to do a course in beauty therapy or the like, he was prepared to help her with that too. She refused and dumped him saying she "liked him", but he "wasn't offering enough money". Ok, by my reckoning, she was getting a bit less that she would be earning at the bar in soi 6. But she would have had a nice loving guy, nice apartment with aircon, shower, TV, nice view etc. etc, 20000B income per month for doing relatively nothing (which is still damn good by Thai wage standards), and would not have to work long hours at the bar shagging numerous (and quite often ugly) blokes facing the risk of STD's and other nasties. She defintiely has a "use by" date in the bar industry, (and what does she do then?), but this guy would have cared for her for a long time (if not marry her) and she would have been set. But for her, she couldn't see past the next week let alone planning for her future. Why?!!! ..."

This story sounds all too familiar to me...basically lived through similar, maybe you missed my few zillion posts on Si Saket girl and me...? I'll spare you...

HIGH_THAIED · August 11, 2005

Hi FlyP,

I'll address example #3 (Bar Girl With Good Offer) as is probably the easiest:

>>>>>Ok, by my reckoning, she was getting a bit less that she would be earning at the bar in soi 6. But she would have had a nice loving guy, nice apartment with aircon, shower, TV, nice view etc. etc, 20000B income per month for doing relatively nothing (which is still damn good by Thai wage standards), and would not have to work long hours at the bar shagging numerous (and quite often ugly) blokes facing the risk of STD's and other nasties. She defintiely has a "use by" date in the bar industry, (and what does she do then?), but this guy would have cared for her for a long time (if not marry her) and she would have been set. But for her, she couldn't see past the next week let alone planning for her future. Why?!!! <<<<<

Because he is not the 'brass ring' that she is after. She wants "better", than she has now. Making the same baht (or less), and still having to fuck farang (albeit just one single one), is not what she wants. Is still same-same for her... without the excitment, and the occasional free trips to Samui, Chiang Mai, etc. While it might be an opportunity for her to get out of the business, it is not what most are looking for. They are there for a reason, and for the majority, is not to just to be able to pay the bills.

The notion that most Thai prositututes will accept anything reasonable (to you anyway) to get out of the business, is silly. Most are not there to just pay the rent, and send a few thousand baht back home. They can do that like 95% of all the other girl's in thailand, without having to fuck a never-ending influx of strange tourists. Many are there to snag someone who will set them up in style, and not just meet someone who can mirror what they can already make on their own.

In your example, I think it is the bar girl who has a much better fix on the "Big Picture", than your friend. Put yourself in their place..... And constantly hearing about Nok, Noi, and Nam who made it big, in their bar.

You think they all will be crawling over one another, at the prospect of 10,000 baht spending money a month, while sitting home knitting your shirts? Hahahhahaa.

You might think of it as Thai B'G's not having a plan for the future. But I see the complete opposite. It's your friend who doesn't have a plan, when trying to exstract a prostitute out the business.

She has a very clear vision of what she wants to accomplish as a final goal, and what she has to do, to get there. And that includes passing up punters who only offer copper, as being gold.

I seriously doubt your friend sees the big picture, as well as she does. Don't sell these girls short. When you start doing that, you will end up at NanaPlaza.com in the "Relationships" forum, asking everybody, "Why did she do that"?

It's a business. And when you start to forget that, you can get into some serious trouble. Both emotionally, and financially.

>>>>>>She defintiely has a "use by" date in the bar industry, (and what does she do then?), but this guy would have cared for her for a long time (if not marry her) and she would have been set. But for her, she couldn't see past the next week let alone planning for her future. Why?!!! <<<<<<

I'm sorry, but had to laugh at above quote. It's based on the outrageous premise that Thai prostitutes are a bunch of impoverished farm girl's, who should be willing to jump at the chance of being the wife of some boring anybody, just to be able to eat, and pay rent.

That is just not the reality, dude. Tell your friend to wake up, and smell the som tam.

HT

HIGH_THAIED · August 11, 2005

Hi FlyP,

>>>>>2. Closed Mindedness

I read on a post in the Regional Sanuk section that a poster was in Malaysia and his wife didn't like it there because "there was no Thai food". Ok, I understand that Thai people like Thai food. But why are they mostly so narrow-minded when it comes to trying new things? Us farangs mostly love trying different foods - Thai, Japanese, French, Italian etc. etc. Why aren't Thais the same? Malay food is still Asian food and its delicious, but Thais don't even think that it might be broadening their horizons and expanding their tastes to something new.<<<<

Simple answer......they are not well traveled, and not cosmopolitan. They are forced to remain in their own world for a varity of reasons, not of their own making. I can easily travel there, but my girl friend cannot come here. In that, lays a big part of the reason.

But is not that simple.

I think the answer lays in that we are slowly becoming a world (global) culture, and Thailand is slow to adapt to that. And thank God for that!.

Close minded? No! They are just adhearing to their culture, and beliefs. And I really hope they can hang on as long as they can to that. The government wants global acceptance and power, but at what price to the Thai culture?

In the end, I think we are unique here, in that we can see the last vestiges of experiencing a truly unique land, and it's people.

The Thai people don't see the big picture? I don't blame them. I don't want to see it either.