Guest Posted February 3, 2004 Report Share Posted February 3, 2004 welcome to the club... :: especially bad when some bird with huge bonkers walks by - i never hear the end of it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnnyk Posted February 4, 2004 Report Share Posted February 4, 2004 This is known as "high-context" and "low-context". Thai and other Asian cultures are "high context", 95% is unspoken and there are very subtle codes and rules that are communicated non-verbally. Western cultures are mostly "low-context", we rely much more on verbal communication to ensure understanding. The TGs often wonder why we ask so many questions, well its just we are used to getting to the meaning by verbalization. They are operating the way they know how and we are often baffled because we miss the signals. They sure don't miss the signals! Ever notice how many books/articles have been written in the West about "body language" and 'non-verbal communication"? We hve to take courses and read books and go to counsellors to even start to unravel it. The TGs have been living it since birth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JJsushi Posted February 4, 2004 Report Share Posted February 4, 2004 johnnyk said:This is known as "high-context" and "low-context". Thai and other Asian cultures are "high context", 95% is unspoken and there are very subtle codes and rules that are communicated non-verbally. Western cultures are mostly "low-context", we rely much more on verbal communication to ensure understanding. The TGs often wonder why we ask so many questions, well its just we are used to getting to the meaning by verbalization. They are operating the way they know how and we are often baffled because we miss the signals. They sure don't miss the signals! Ever notice how many books/articles have been written in the West about "body language" and 'non-verbal communication"? We hve to take courses and read books and go to counsellors to even start to unravel it. The TGs have been living it since birth. This is exactly why I think it is funny whenever I read a post where a guy says that he "carefully explained to her from day one that I cannot. . ." You can explain and be as honest and open as you want but there are some things that a Thai person will expect and view in a different manner that all your openess and explaining will not dispel. Culturally we are not wired the same when it comes to communication. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 4, 2004 Report Share Posted February 4, 2004 I also find that when they finally do say something serious, it may only be said once and we are expected to a) remember it forever and accept that it never needs to be repeated. When I question my gf about something, she will often say, "but I told you about that...... What's the matter? Don't you believe me? " And if you try to go over something again, the reply is "You talk too much". Or am I just insecure Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
khwaimaisabai Posted February 4, 2004 Report Share Posted February 4, 2004 Hi lhl, I know exactly what you mean. Sometimes, out of nowhere will come an explanation of something that happened months ago. Taken by surprise, follow up questions don't immediately spring to mind. Then, a few days later if the subject is raised, I get "I don't want to talk about it any more". From this and other posts of yours, I get a feeling we have some similar experiences with the TGF. Couldn't be the same person could it? Khwai Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 4, 2004 Report Share Posted February 4, 2004 Hi JohnnyK: 1. Do you think Thai's are consciously aware of this? 2. Has it arisen because the tonal nature of Thai language makes it difficult to provide an emotional context for their words using sound alone? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
khwaimaisabai Posted February 4, 2004 Report Share Posted February 4, 2004 Hi nick, I would guess Thais are as consciously aware of this point as much as farangs are - in other words, not usually. Both just take "our way" as the norm. I doubt the second point because this is more an Asian thing than specifically Thai and many Asian languages are not tonal. Khwai Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 4, 2004 Report Share Posted February 4, 2004 Thai women seem to use that intuative knowledge of a persons feelings/moods more than most. They have fine tuned that radar set since infancy. I know several, OK many, bgs that can do a sweep of a room and tell you what every guy is looking for. And no, not just that. They are highly sensitive to body language and manage to derive much more information than one would think possible. Like to sit with some I know and they comment on what they see. Scary. Damn scary. Don't think language is a major factor here. In fact they are usually not as adept as westerners about the subtlety of languages, except their own. No doubt there may well be some who get all the nuances of another language as well. They just listen for the emotions. I worked with a master that said you could train yourself to hear the truth. That lies had a certain tonal quality that truth did not. It works for me to a degree, but I think some Thai women have retained that natural ability. So buddy, you bettter believe she knows. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
johnnyk Posted February 5, 2004 Report Share Posted February 5, 2004 Dr. Nick, I really don't know. The "high-context" thing just came into my mind as the post made me remember that I had read this somewhere. At first I thought it meant that many Asians had a superior understanding of each other (mono-cultures etc) than do mongrelized westerners. However when I was living in Taiwan a very smart, well-educated lady told me the amount of misunderstanding and ambiguity among Chinese was maddening but westerners didn't see it as a rule. I've since come around to greeing with her pretty much. Re: Thais - I don't think they are generally introspective the way we are: constantly analyzing etc. As Buddhists I think the wheel just keeps turning whereas we are linear and keep looking for definitive goals, results etc. For them its more a case of "next time". Thanks all for an interesting thread here. Look forward to more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 5, 2004 Report Share Posted February 5, 2004 2. Has it arisen because the tonal nature of Thai language makes it difficult to provide an emotional context for their words using sound alone? What type of emotions I have heard from my TGF when calling her (she speaks only thai): 1) kidding 2) serious 3) impatient 4) sleepy 5) tired 6) sorry, no time .... Ok, very often I make mistakes when I try to interprete but I become better ... DrNick, I don't think that people can't express emotions because they use a tonal language. Best regards Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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