Mekong Posted January 19, 2014 Report Posted January 19, 2014 A Glasgow policeman spots a huge black guy dancing on the roof of a Ford car. He radios for backup. "What's the situation?" "A big fat darkie is dancing on a car roof." You can't say that over the radio, use proper police talk." replies the operator. "You have to use the politically correct terminology" “OK" he says: "Zulu....Tango....Sierra When I heard that joke he was doing the Foxtrot
radioman Posted January 19, 2014 Report Posted January 19, 2014 Check em all out http://worldobserver...gh-cry-and-gag/ 1. Welcome, leadies and jents!
The_Munchmaster Posted January 29, 2014 Report Posted January 29, 2014 What's the difference between an airship and 365 blowjobs? One is a Goodyear and the other is an excellent year.
The_Munchmaster Posted January 29, 2014 Report Posted January 29, 2014 A bloke walks into a doctor’s surgery looking a bit sheepish. The doctor asks him what the problem is and he explains that it’s a rather delicate matter to do with his back passage, which he finds difficult to talk about. “I’ve been in this business for 24 yearsâ€, says the doctor. “There’s not much I haven’t seen so you’d save us both a lot of time if you just told me what is wrong with you.†“I think I’d find it a lot easier if I just showed youâ€, the man says, and proceeds to drop his trousers and bend over. The sight of the guy’s arsehole renders the doctor speechless; it’s been torn to the size of a football and is badly bruised. “Christ!†said the doctor, “What the hell happened to you?†“Wellâ€, the bloke replies, “I was on safari in Kenya and I was raped by a bull elephant.†The doctor considers this and says, “Well sir, my knowledge of veterinary science may be limited, but I thought elephants’ penises were long and thin.†“That’s right, doctorâ€, the guy agrees, “but he fingered me first!â€
bust Posted January 29, 2014 Author Report Posted January 29, 2014 If Mary, James, Peter, Richard, David and John are all in separate vehicles, traveling at a constant speed of 60mph, in the same forward direction with no obstacles, at which point is Mary likely to stamp on her brakes and cause a fucking accident?
Hamokhamok Posted January 30, 2014 Report Posted January 30, 2014 A secretary got an expensive pen as a gift from her boss. She sent him a Thank you note by email. Boss’s wife read the email and filed for divorce. The email said: Your penis wonderful and I enjoyed using it last night. It has extra ordinary smooth flow and a firm stroke. I loved its perfect size and grip. Felt like I was in heaven when using it. Thanks a lot Moral: A space is an essential part of English grammar.
BelgianBoy Posted January 30, 2014 Report Posted January 30, 2014 so, when is Mary likely to stamp on her brakes and cause a fucking accident.....?
Flashermac Posted February 5, 2014 Report Posted February 5, 2014 An elderly couple had just learned how to send text messages on their cell phones. The wife was a romantic and the husband more of a no-nonsense guy. One afternoon the wife went out to meet a friend for coffee. She decided to send her husband a romantic text message, so she wrote the following: If you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile. If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are drinking, send me a sip. If you are crying, send me your tears. I love you. The husband texted back to her: "I'm on the toilet. Please advise."
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