Mia Noi Allowance

[..]

That is pretty much the Thai male reasoning. Nothing to do with love or even sex, just a status symbol. The prettier she is and the more mia-nois you have the more "status" you have cuz you can afford it. No different than dirving a Benz, I understand.

 

"millions can afford"

 

Not true. You guys are way off the mark when it comes to mia-nois. Maybe a misuse of the word. We are talking about mistresses or "kept women" to use the old tymey phrase. Most Thai mia nois are NOT ex-P4P ladies. They are educated and or very beautiful career girls found by the right guy at the right time. They sacrifice love, children and family life to be a mia noi as they will never have any of that.

 

FYI, my father-in-law's mia nois (2 of em) get ~50K/month and have no real expenses (condos are owned by him, he gives them the two year old Benz when he gets a new one, etc.). They of course would be immediately dismissed if seen socially with any other male.

 

Cheers,

SD

[ThaiHome]

Well, convenience does come to mind.

It is pretty convenient to be able to just drive up any time of day (a phone call ahead is a good idea ) and knock off a quick one with known quantity. ::

TH

[buffalo_bill]

HT ,

 

respectfully : you like most combatantes here , except Thaihome ,miss the concept. Once you start considering expenses and get a headache over that , better do not establish a Mia Noi. Spending what you think is too much money is based on the idea that madame should live in conditions comparable to the ones you claim for yourself or Wife No.1 . Who wants to keep a lady on a budget, this is stupid.

 

" Millions can afford one but choose not to " . I doubt that the majority of the non-choosers dislike the idea. it is probably the missus with the rolling pin behind the door they are afraid of or lack of opportunity, still you need the sanuker spirit after all and a wallet that suits your spirit.

 

BuBi

[Guest]

::

 

Interesting responses from you both. I know nothing of that world, to be sure. I'm just very courious about it. While I can see it a game for the rich, most stories I hear are from the one's who cannot afford, and get burned badly.

 

But most of these, are from one's in a realationship, and decide to take on another due to affections they feel for the second wife/gf they are doing. In simplistic terms, they got a whore on the side, whom they want only for themselves, and want no one else to touch.

 

It's just staggering the price some are willing to pay for this fantasy. ::

 

HT

[buffalo_bill]

suadum,

 

a quality post , I couldn't express it in sweeter words. Please give my best regards to your father in law, a gentleman of a bygone area , I bow my head in respect , he good heart. I further hope he not boom boom himself dead too soon.

 

About Mia Noi being a status symbol : the Asian gentlemen other than the ones from Italy do never talk about girlfriends and sex in general. The Mia Noi is kept secret as far as I can see .

 

BuBi

[Guest]

>>>>Most Thai mia nois are NOT ex-P4P ladies. They are educated and or very beautiful career girls found by the right guy at the right time. They sacrifice love, children and family life to be a mia noi as they will never have any of that.<<<<

 

Really? Good info. then. Do you think most are resigned to the fact that they will always be a 'kept woman' of her benifactor, and never aspire to anything greater than that?

 

And also, do you think most are faithful?

 

HT

[ThaiHome]

Please read suadum's post carefully. These are not whores.

TH

[Guest]

So many questions....

 

How often is the presence of a mia noi an indication of a dead marriage? I.e. is the mia noi a sexual and emotional outlet for someone who is no longer attracted to his wife? Or will a man who has a healthy sexual relationship with his spouse of 15 years still have a mia noi?

 

Is a mia noi a face saving alternative to divorce? Does anyone know whether a divorced woman is considered damaged goods in Thailand?

 

Thanks

[Guest]

Hi TH,

 

Well....I guess that comes down to your definition. So far we have detirmend that a mia noi is a mistress to a married man. She is a woman who forgoes being seen with him, children, and a true husband she can call her own, in return for providing sex to him, as long as he will support her, and give her a constant influx of cash and support. Technically yes, that would be a prostitute. A woman who provides sexual favors for money/support.

 

A whore, by my definition, would be a woman who gives it up for the sheer enjoyment of it, and give it up for anybody, money not part of the picture.

 

What am I missing here? A mia noi is a woman who provides sex for a married man, who in turn gives her money. Because she is selling herself to only one guy, instead of 4, does that make things different? I'm really not trying to be confrentational here. Just trying to understand the mentality behind keeping a woman on the side, and have it be somehow different than running down to your local brothel for a piece of secretive ass on the side. Help me to understand. ::

 

HT

[JJsushi]

HIGH THAIED said:

Just thinking.......what is the general aliance with the general mia noi situation? Due to the high maintainace costs, it must be love, in some form, unless you are just filthy rich. If I guy is paying 30,000 a month, is comes out to over US$9,000.00 a year, and this is just for allowence. Other costs bring it to US$15,000 per year, at least. What is the motive for that?

 

I'm thinking of what I could have there for $15,000 a year, and it drives suporting a single girl right out of the picture. Holy shit....what are they thinking? It can only be love, because it sure does not make good business sense.

 

Honestly....what is the motivation to pay for a mia noi?

 

HT

Your problem is that you get too hung up with the numbers or the money. There are alot of ways to spend US$10-15k on frivolous things.

 

Having a kept woman is a lifestyle choice. The same as a guy who travels 4 times a year to LOS to indulge in the nightlife and the same as you spending countless hours chatting up Thai women online. Personally I don't "get" the online chat thing to look for women but for many it is a lifestyle choice.

 

Maybe I can shed a litle light on it for you from another perspective.

 

I have an uncle that left the States 30yrs ago and moved to the Phillipines. He fell in love married a local girl and had a kid. He learned to spek Tagalog but for some reason he couldn't figure out why the local men generally avoided him. He was a devoted husband, good father and helped people when he could. Yet he never made that "male bond" connect thing.

 

Finally a Fillipino guy told him that many of the men thought he was not a real man and a hard worker. He explained to my uncle that a hard working and real man would have several other women and not just stay with one woman exclusively. A man with several women had to work hard in order to take care of those women.

 

My uncle for whatever personal reasons he decided, started to mess around with more women and eventually had a few "minor wives". Before he knew it he was treated like any other Filipino and accepted by the men. This acceptance opened up a whole new world for him relationship and business wise. It may sound silly but that one act gained him alot of respect with the locals because he ceased to be an outsider.

 

His wife and all the other women accepted this behavior even thought they didn't like it as long as he took care of them appropriately. Along with his primary wife with whom he had 2 children he fathered another 5 with his other 3 "wives". Everybody knew about it and everybody got along because he paid the bills and did not publicly embarass anyone. He has been in the PI for 30yrs now and has no intention of coming back to the States.

 

The point of my story was to show that for many it is a lifestyle decision and it does not become an analytical exercise in which you have to run a spreadsheet to have it make economic sense.

 

Some people may puzzle as to why someone would spend US$85k on a Benz when a Toyata can provide the same function for a third of the price. The answer is simple, the buyer can afford it and most importantly he WANTS it.